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Not Ready for Sex? Here Are 5 Tips For Steamy Makeout Sessions Without Going All The Way

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If you’re not ready for sex yet, you’re not alone. There are couples who have decided to not go all the way for one reason or another. Maybe it has something to do with their beliefs and their principles. Maybe they’re just not ready for the consequences of sex (early pregnancy, starting a family too early, etc.).

Your reasons for waiting to have sex are your own; don’t let the pressure get to you. Some women think that they’re letting their boyfriend suffer because of their decision not to go all the way. If you’re one of these girls, you shouldn’t believe that penetration is the only way to make love to your boyfriend.

What’s really important in love making is how you can make your guy feel the ultimate pleasure without giving up your cherry. In short, there are more ways to make a guy reach orgasm than they teach in Sex Ed. Read on to discover five of the best make out techniques you can use to please your man….

5 Tips For Steamy Makeout Sessions Without Going All The Way

Learn The Art Of French Kissing

Torrid kissing is one of the main aspects of your makeout sessions, so you must do it right. Feel free to suck and nibble his lips when you’re feeling playful. Use your tongue to tease his tongue out, not for him to choke on. Play with his tongue using your lips.

Fondle His Member

Give your man a hand job while you’re kissing. One way to make sure his arousal will peak is to coordinate your kissing with your hand movements. For instance, whenever you suck his tongue, squeeze his member a bit and stroke faster. Do the same trick when you’re kissing his neck and ears.

Main a good stroking rhythm and you can bet he’ll be ready to explode by the time you move down to give him head.

Let Him Touch Your Breasts

One way to make him feel that you’re connected with him erotically is to allow him to touch your boobs while you’re kissing and stroking him. He will hear you sigh and moan while you’re kissing him, and this will increase his arousal.

Move Downward Slowly

Getting him excited means moving slowly. This will also ensure that he can feel every stroke of your tongue and every movement of your lips. Moving your head gradually downward while stroking him with the same rhythm will move him closer to orgasm.

Alternate Licking His Member And His Balls

While you’re stroking him up and down, kiss the tip of his member or lick his balls. Let his moans and movements be your guide and be extremely conscious of his reactions so that you know when to intensify the blow job.

Applying these techniques will improve your foreplay skills. The good news is that your man will be more than satisfied, and he will not be looking elsewhere for release whenever he’s horny.

4 Secrets Guaranteed To Spice Up Your Sex Life

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Sex is a healthy, fundamental component of all good relationships. It unites men and women everywhere, both physically and emotionally and allows both the guy and the girl to truly unleash and express their animalistic AND sensual sides.

But no one’s sex life is perfect. Things slow down, the energy seems to disappear, it’s not as fun or exciting as either of you would like, in short, it needs improving.

So what can you do to get back (or even create for the first time) that special spark that makes great sex so…well, great? Here are 4 top tips.

1. Play Games

The thing that often grinds sex lives to a halt and makes lovemaking become so much of a hassle is the pressure and responsibility that surrounds the whole subject.

For the man, there’s the burden of having to make the girl reach her own climax. For the woman, there’s the strain of making sure her man is sexually satisfied and not bored and liable to go looking elsewhere for sex or questioning the stability and longevity of the relationship they’re both in.

To counteract these negative pressures, try making having sex a less traditional, scheduled, boring task. Instead, pick a couple of fun games that you can play together that are fun and flirty and that can lead casually and smoothly into the actual sex.

Twister, strip poker and spin-the-bottle are all great games that incorporate physical contact and allow both you and your partner to have a little no-hassle, no-responsibility fun that does or doesn’t have to lead to a bout of impromptu lovemaking.

2. New Locations, New Positions

People often have a very 2-dimensional outlook on the nature of sex and how one should go about having it. The vast, vast majority of people, for example, only have sex in the bedroom.

And even they have a set routine, lights dimmed or off, the same progression through the various stages of sex: a little foreplay, intercourse in missionary and maybe doggy if the guy’s lucky and the girls feeling up to it, then it’s pretty much over. Even if your personal situation has more life than that, sex in the bedroom can still become a drag after a while.

So, switch it up. Think about different locations you can use: the living room, bathroom, kitchen…consider all possibilities, even if they at first seem far-fetched and silly. Also, think about locations away from the home once in a while.

Motels and cheap hotels offer a couple a fresh place to explore each other. Secondly, improvise and experiment with the positions you use. Missionary, girl on top, spoons, and doggy are all great, but always try to mix in a few more unusual, adventurous ones to spice things up.

Even if you find yourself in a tangle with your partner, you’ve still had fun and been spontaneous, which is a key component of any great sex life.

3. Communicate Fantasies

Something few men and women do is talk to their partners about what turns them on, about things they’d like to try, scenarios they’d love to act out, etc. etc. Make telling your partner about things that turn you on a regular thing and, in return, you listen to their previously private fantasies and day-dreams.

If doing it face-to-face is too embarrassing, consider sending saucy messages via email or text message. You’ll find that after reading about what really gets your partner going, you’ll be much more excited and motivated to please them sexually, and they’ll feel the same way back!

4.  Special Occasions

When you do the same thing many times, even if it started out feeling new and exciting, it can get a little run-of-the-mill and boring. So, to inject a real sense of passion and renewed excitement into your sex life, make certain evenings special nights in (or out, then in!).

Go the whole way to making it feel almost like a celebration and do whatever’s necessary to separate it from your usual lovemaking sessions. Popular favourites include getting dressed up separately from your partner, perhaps at a friend’s house, then meeting them in a restaurant for a meal.

Then, on returning home, you can indulge each other with a slow and sensual massage or perhaps carry out one or more of the fantasies you’ve been hinting to each other about. From there, sex can begin. Maybe on the floor of the living room or even on the stairs.

Remember, impulsiveness and adventurousness are a turn on, use them to kick-start your sex life!

Top 10 Things Women Wish Men Would Do Before, During and After Sex

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These days it should come as no surprise that women enjoy sex just as much as men do, but one thing that has stayed the same is that they would like men to ‘just know’ what they want without having to break down and tell them!

This article should make sex a real no-brainer for you from here on thanks to these ten things that women admit to wanting even if they don’t necessarily admit it to you!

Before Sex She Wants You To…

1. Kiss Her

It seems that kissing has become a bit of a lost art in this day and age and this is especially the case when a couple has been together for a long time. Spend a few minutes just kissing (a.k.a. making out) the way you did when you were a teenager. You’d be surprised at how hot kissing can really be!

2. Indulge in Some Foreplay

Women need a little more than guys do in order to get really turned in and primed for action. By treating them to more foreplay, not only do you increase their chances of an orgasm, but you’re also setting yourself up for some very hot sex to follow!

3. Be Romantic

This should come as no shocker to anyone as it has been a problem since the beginning of man! While women enjoy a hard sexy throw down on occasion, they still want to be pampered and romanced a little.

Take some time to light a candle or two or just say something romantic. It doesn’t take a bed sprinkled with rose petals to make a woman happy-though that would be great too.

During  Sex She Wants You To…

4. Look Into Her Eyes

You can’t even begin to imagine how incredibly arousing it can be to keep your eyes focused on each other during sex.

It creates an intimacy like nothing else which most women crave from their partners and it can really help you get in tune with each other so you’re better able to know what feels good to them and what could use a little work; all without having to say a word.

5. Be A Little Rough

Yes, women want romance and tenderness, but most often before sex. During sex a woman wants to feel the passion and the urgency that comes from being wanted and desired.

Men are often afraid to be too rough, but the truth is that many women want to be handled a little harder during sex. Note: Tip #5 is a great one to help gauge just how rough you should be with her.

6. Not Forget Her Clitoris

The clitoris is the female equivalent of the penis, meaning that it is full of pleasure-feeling nerve endings that need to be stimulated to achieve orgasm.  Most often a man will be so wrapped up in all the thrusting that he will neglect the most sensual part of her body. Spend some time on the clitoris and you’ll make her one happy camper!

After Sex She Wants You To…

7. Cuddle

Big surprise; a woman wants to be held a little after sex as opposed to having you roll over and fall asleep like she’s not even there. Put your arms around her, let her rest her head on you and try to stay awake for the next tip.

8. Say Something

Again, this one should come as no surprise. This is because women tend to feel more vulnerable after sex and by taking the time to listen and talk to her; you are making her feel more at ease and special.

9. Be Tender

Once the passionate, raw sex is done and over with, it’s time to treat her like a delicate little lady again.

And Finally…

10. Have sex with her again!

That’s right; while most men need to rest and regroup after they climax, women are usually good to go again rather quickly and would appreciate another round!

Touch – It’s More Than Sex

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Every wonder why a man gets instantly excited by the slightest little touch?

The reasons behind his reaction may not be as simple as assuming that he’s just over-sexed. It may go much, much deeper…

We all associate different emotions (good and bad) with different types of touching such as holding hands, hugging, getting a massage, and kissing. Some of these emotions can be very powerful and have a significant impact on how we relate to others.

Read this great article from featured author Melody Brooke to find out why the way we touch one another is extremely important to a happy and secure relationship.

Touch – It’s More Than Sex

by Melody Brooke, MA, LPC, LMFT

For many men, the opportunity to be touched, even casually by a woman is arousing.  And, no, it’s not because men are different than women innately.  This is because boys are often raised with little physical nurturance.  Some men are so touch deprived that they shut off the awareness of the need for it entirely.  As a result they appear cold, distant and emotionally unavailable.  They have little understanding of why a woman wants to be touched or cuddled.  It completely baffles them.

Many cultures within the larger American culture work to toughen up boys and assume that cuddling, hugging and kissing boys makes “Mama’s boys” or “Sissies” out of them.  This creates an environment in which our male children are raised without physical touch.  Yet we know, from years of research that touch is a basic need.  Babies deprived of touch do not survive; they will quit eating and die.  While men, even 5 or 6 year old boys are not infants, they, like all of us have a basic need to be held, to be touched, and otherwise physically nurtured.   This need for touch can be hidden away for years, until perhaps in their early teens, a girl steals a kiss or holds his hands.  Suddenly he finds himself aroused and from that moment on, associates touch with sex.

Then these poor guys get accused of being hyper sexual because the need for touch, which has been repressed for years, suddenly emerges as sexual desire.  The hormone oxytocin carries messages of bonding, safety, overall well being and of love to our brains and to our bodies.  It also increases sexual arousal. This hormone is released when there is any type of skin-to-skin contact. This generally happens at the same time as the developmental hormonal changes of adolescence, further complicating matters.  From the male perspective then, touch=sex.

Every touch experienced carries a different electrochemical message to the brain. Even small, very light touches can create tremendous brain activity. When you expanded to hugging, the response is magnified many times because it brings with it memories of previous experiences (or lack thereof) and the attached emotional meaning. (Welch, 1988) When a person is upset or stressed, taking their hand usually produces a soothing effect, reducing anxiety, and generating a feeling of greater security as the oxytocin is released.

Couples observed touching affectionately test as being more securely attached and having a more satisfying sex life.  If you are unhappy with the amount of sexual activity with your partner, notice what happens when you become more affectionate in general with each other.  Increasing overall affectionate behaviors can have a positive effect on each of you individually, as well as increasing the amount of sexual activity between you…

Touch alone can transform the quality of your relationship.

If you are not feeling safe enough with your partner to enjoy copious amounts of affection, you might want to ask yourself why not.  Is this because of your own discomfort with touch?  Or is it because you fear that touch will initiate sex when that is always what you want? Is your partner uncomfortable with touch and therefore reluctant to express their affection physically? These are all questions that you and your partner should discuss, certainly before committing to a long-term relationship.

While some couples settle into a kind of comfortable physical distance, their emotional connection is often just as distant.  If you are not comfortable with idea of an emotionally distant relationship, then you should be aware of the impact of physical distance on the quality of your relationship.

Try livening up your relationship by making it a point to hug and kiss your partner when you come home, or being sure that you cuddle up close before drifting off to sleep.

Hold hands while you walk together. Women, spend time giving your partner a massage. Non-sexual touch can evoke strong feelings in a touch-deprived male.  If your partner has an intensely emotional response, be open to allowing him to have those feelings in the safety of your presence. It can be deeply bonding.  Men, touch your partners’ arms while she is talking to you, touch her face as you tell her about your day, it will make her feel cherished and valued.

Increasing the amount of touch you give will improve more than your relationship in the process.  Infusing your body with Oxytocin, through touch, will provide you with reduced stress and boost your sense of well being.

Here’s How to Make the Transition from Friends to More Than Friends a Little Easier

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The Question

I’ve recently had feelings for this girl and it turns out she’s had feelings for me as well.

We’ve been friends with each other for years but there’s always been something more there.

She told me that she had liked me more than a friend in the past and she does presently, and it’s the same story with me.

A few days ago we kissed for the first time after we had been out with a group of friends but were alone at the time. From that point on I considered us to be “official” and that’s also what she said to me after the kiss.

However, just two days later she sent me a text message saying “I can’t do this, I just can’t right now.”

She has been messed around by boyfriends in the past and treated particularly badly by her previous boyfriend. I’m afraid this has something to do with it.

I really want to make it happen with this girl. Any ideas?????

So what would you do in this situation?

Force the issue and tell her to get over it or maybe sit back and wait for her indefinitely?

Here’s what I would do in the same situation.

The Answer

It sounds like she’s a little “gun shy” and who can blame her. Give her time and show her that you’re not like her previous boyfriends. She may just be really nervous about crossing the “dating” line and taking the risk of losing you as a friend.

Talk to her.

Tell her openly and honestly how you feel without putting any pressure on her. Let her know that you’re there for her regardless of whether or not she’s your girlfriend or just your friend. Whether your relationship with her is labeled as “romantic” or not, it sounds like you have a good relationship, one worth keeping. Too many people let their hormones drive their intellect and ruin a perfectly good relationship – don’t be one of those.

If she just wants to keep you as a friend, it doesn’t mean that she’s rejecting you as a person. It simply means that she’s not ready for a romantic relationship and doesn’t want to date you right now. So many men get angry over this situation because they take it personally, but most likely it has nothing to do with you – she’s already told you that she’s attracted to you.

Ask yourself why you want to take the relationship to the next level.

Is it physical attraction and sex? Are you looking for a long term relationship? Do you just want to know that you have a girlfriend?

There are no right or wrong answers, but it’s important for you to know what you’re looking for so that you can help her better understand. And if you don’t know what you’re looking for that’s OK too. Just make sure to be honest with her.

Ask her to be honest with you and don’t judge her when she is.

If the previous boyfriends really are the reason, then you’ll need to respect and accept that if you really care for her. If she’s just not emotionally ready to be in a romantic relationship, then she shouldn’t be in one with you or anyone else.

So many people make the mistake of getting into a relationship when they’re really not ready to be involved at that level with another person and it usually ends badly and with regrets on both sides. So make sure she’s ready and don’t push. Let her know that you’ll be there for her when she’s ready – if that’s something that you’re willing to do.

Don’t stop being friends just because of a kiss.

I’ll take one good friend over 10 girlfriends any day!

Maybe there’ll be more to your relationship and maybe there won’t, but you’ll both have more respect and trust for each other in the end. It’s not always easy, but try to enjoy your relationship for where it is today.

Whatever is going to happen tomorrow will happen tomorrow and that’s OK. Always live in the Now.