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Q&A: Sex Positions And How She Can Last Longer When She’s On Top

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Sex positions can help you go faster in bed or last longer, depending on which ones you use. Different sex positions help accomplish different things, such as reaching the g-spot better or providing more clitoral stimulation.  Many women like to be on top to speed orgasm up, but there are a lot of women that can actually climax too quickly this way! Here’s how to last longer when riding your man.

Question: My boyfriend really likes it when I’m on top, but I’d like to know how I can last longer in this position. After 2 minutes I get tired! If I let myself go and enjoy, I get paralysed by the pleasure, if I try to focus I lose it. Please help me!

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdJcRDL06CE&feature=relmfu[/youtube]

Why Girl On Top Is So Great

This sex position is great for many women, because it allows them control over basically every aspect of sex with their partners. When a woman is on top, she can control the pace, as well as the angle and depth of penetration. Having her man underneath her and being in control of everything will often help a woman reach orgasm faster than during other sex positions like missionary or doggy style.

Unfortunately, it’s easy for a woman to get tired when she’s riding her man, because she’s basically the one doing all the work. Her legs or arms may cramp up, or she may get a cramp in her hip depending on what angle she’s at. If she’s trying to go faster after her orgasm so that her man can catch up, she may get tired quickly and be uninterested in continuing, especially if she’s already “gotten hers.”

Go Slower

If you tend to get tired easily when using woman-on-top sex positions, try going slower. Ladies, you don’t have to reach climax within minutes of getting on your guy, just because you can. Stretch it out and make it last – not only will going slower feel better and allow your pleasure to really build, it will also help your guy catch up to you more easily when you can’t hold it in anymore. You’ll last longer because you’re not getting tired as quickly, and also because you’re concentrating less on reaching orgasm and more on prolonging intercourse.

Also, try supporting yourself some with your arms, or use pillows so that your partner can take over some of the thrusting when you get tired. He can do this easily by lifting his legs up a little, bending his knees and putting his feet on the bed (or the floor, couch or wherever you’re at), allowing him to use his feet and legs as leverage to thrust. Not only will this give you a break from doing all the work, it will feel really amazing for him!

Change The Angle And Depth Of Penetration

If you find that you’re just simply reaching orgasm too quickly when you’re on top and your guy is lagging behind, you may need to change the angle or depth that your partner’s penis penetrates so you don’t get too excited too fast. Pull back a little bit and don’t bump up against his pelvis if you notice that gives you a lot of stimulation to your clitoris. Or, sit back or move forward a little to keep the head of his penis from rubbing so much against your g-spot.

Try The Reverse Cowgirl

One of the best sex positions for women to last longer when she’s on top is the reverse cowgirl. This involves a woman riding her man, but while facing his feet instead of his torso. Not only does this give your guy quite the show, it also helps you to keep from reaching climax too quickly. This is because you’re not grinding your pelvis so much against his and stimulating your clitoris, and his penis is also at an angle that doesn’t rub the g-spot as much.

Trying Different Sex Positions

While you may really enjoy girl on top sex positions, if they’re not working, they’re not working. You may need to switch to something else – at least for a while anyway – so you’re not climaxing so fast and leaving your partner in the dust so to speak. Finding different sex positions that allow you and your partner to orgasm closer together (or even have a simultaneous orgasm!) may soon become your new favorite.

Sex is supposed to be fun and enjoyable. If you’re stressing out over not being able to last very long in one sex position, just try another and go with the flow. Experiment to find what works! Chances are, it’s going to be more than one thing that does the trick, but it just may not be what you expect.

How To Make Everyday Activities SEXY!

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Flirting isn’t just for dates – you can flirt anytime, anywhere! Here’s how to use flirting to up the ante when doing normal, every day things! You may not realize it, but there are numerous opportunities throughout your day to work in some valuable, sexy couple time. It might not feel like it, of course, between all those hours spent at work, doing chores around the house, and trying to stay healthy with regular exercise. However, if you’re willing to take a second look at the things you do every day, you will soon see that many of them can involve your partner in new, fun ways.

Flirting When Exercising Together

Your workout is a great place to start. What do you and/or your significant other typically do for exercise? Is it something that you can start doing together, like running, biking or hiking? Having your S.O. there with you won’t just add to the time you spend together each day, but it will also give you both an extra incentive to stay on top of your workouts. You may even find that having a little friendly competition will push you to run faster, bike for longer, etc.

Best of all, exercise boosts your endorphins and your overall mood, along with your sex drive. If you’re both getting fit together, you just might find you’re in the mood for sex more often than before. You can even spice things up by making little bets here or there—i.e. whoever finishes your running route the fastest gets to pick the position you use in bed that night.

In addition to blending your preexisting workouts together, you might also want to look into new forms of exercise. You could both sign up for a team sport together, or start playing one-on-one basketball or tennis with each other. Better still, try taking a Latin dance class together. You’ll be surprised at how much of a workout you both get, and all that close contact is bound to put you in the mood for sex.

Flirting While Doing Chores Together

Working out together is hardly the only way to build more couple-time into your days. You can take some of your least-loved things, like chores, and use them as an excuse to get closer with your sweetheart. Turn chores into games. Divide up the house cleaning, and whoever completes their chores first each day gets to choose a sexy activity to participate in that night. Wash the dishes together, and each time the person washing or drying falls behind the other person, they have to take off one item of clothing.

Though you might be tempted to take a little extra time doing the dishes—all in the sake of stripping down to your undies—you’ll surely end up enjoying it. You can even do the whole French Maid costume thing while actually cleaning your bedroom, although you might not get very far if your partner can’t handle the wait. In general, though, one of the best things about doing all of your chores together is that the work will be evenly divided up, and you’ll ultimately end up with more downtime to spend together.

Flirting While Cooking Together

Perhaps one of the most fun everyday things you can enjoy with your partner is cooking. When you’ve both gotten home from work, instead of flipping on the TV and waiting for takeout to arrive, try making dinner together. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. It just needs to be something that you can both cook together. Take turns being the head cook and the assistant cook so no one ever feels like they’re secondary. Food is highly sensual.

It’s said that, outside of actually having sex, feeding someone you’re attracted to is one of the most sexual things out there. So don’t be afraid to taste test with each other as you go. Licking a little of that sauce off your partner’s finger certainly can’t hurt. You’re not at a restaurant, either, so you can feel free to cook in an apron and nothing else if you’d like. Just don’t set the kitchen on fire if you get too distracted with each other.

Whether you’re racing each other down the block or playing naughty chefs, the key to spicing up everyday life is simple. Involve your partner in your routine and try to put a positive, sexy spin on otherwise mundane things. The more often you do it, the more natural it will seem to find joy in everything simply by being together.

Male Sex Toys – 5 Things That AREN’T For Her!

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Male sex toys are becoming more and more popular as guys realize that they’re not only for women. Men can have just as much fun during masturbation as a woman can! Here are some must have male sex toys!

A Masturbation Sleeve

Every guy needs one of these! Forget masturbating with your hand – these soft jelly or skin-like sleeves are specifically designed to maximize a man’s pleasure during masturbation. Male sex toys just don’t get any better than this – there are hundreds of different materials, sizes and looks to choose from, so it’s not at all difficult to find one that you really enjoy. Men who use masturbation sleeves report better, deeper orgasms and more overall satisfaction.

Also, keep in mind that to use a masturbation sleeve, you need a bottle of lube hanging around. Most lube will work, but pay attention and don’t use silicone lubes with silicone sleeves, or oil based lubes with latex sleeves. A good, water based lubricant will work with any material.

A Cock Ring

Most guys don’t think about using a cock ring during masturbation, but it can make a world of difference! Cock rings aren’t just for guys who have erectile dysfunction and can’t keep it up, nor are they just for couples who like a vibrating bullet in between them. A soft jelly cock ring can just feel great during masturbation, while a stiffer one can prolong a man’s erection and make his orgasm absolutely incredible.

A Prostate Stimulator

You may have heard that the best male orgasm comes from massaging the prostate gland – however, many guys are still too shy to try anal stimulation. If you can get past the “ick” factor that many men have when thinking about playing with the anus during masturbation, you can have a lot of fun and even more pleasure.

A good drawer full of male sex toys isn’t complete without a prostate stimulator. If you’re new to it, or are still a little creeped out by it but want to achieve that amazing orgasm that everyone is always talking about, try starting with a smaller prostate stimulator. A tiny butt plug will get you used to anal play during masturbation, and as you get more and more into it, you can replace your beginner’s sex toys with more advanced ones.

A Penis Pump

Penis pumps are also not male sex toys that are confined to men that struggle with erectile dysfunction. Any man can enjoy a penis pump, especially if he wants to mimic the sucking feeling produced during oral sex or if he just wants a bigger, harder erection. Penis pumps are often inexpensive, and you can even get pumping models that have a soft jelly or skin-like “masturbation sleeve” attachment.

Be careful when using a penis pump, and never, ever use a vacuum cleaner instead of a pump made specifically for sex. If you pump too hard, you can cause bruising or pain and discomfort. Not worth it! But when used correctly before or during your masturbation session, you can experience more pleasure with a bigger, longer and harder penis.

A Masturbator Mount

If you really want masturbation to feel like a vagina, try purchasing a masturbator mount. Some mounts may only be compatible with some brands of masturbation sleeves, while other types of sleeves cannot be mounted at all. If you’re looking into a mount, make sure you choose one that is compatible with the masturbation sleeve that you already have or are willing to purchase a new one.

A masturbator mount will hold the masturbation sleeve for you, so you can enjoy it absolutely hands free. There are different styles of mounts depending on which sex position you enjoy most – and you can pick the one you like instead of trying to find one that you and someone else will enjoy!

You will love the hands free action that a mount can provide, because it makes it feel even more like sex. Even with a masturbation sleeve, there’s something about doing it with your hands that makes it feel not as good as the real thing (probably because it isn’t the real thing). However, with a mount, you can trick your brain into thinking you’re actually doing the dirty, especially if you close your eyes or have your favorite porn playing on the television in front of you. Just don’t forget to lock the doors!

Anal Fingering – 6 Techniques To Introduce Your Partner To Anal Play

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Anal fingering can be a great way to introduce new sensations in your sexual repertoire. The anus is packed with tons of pleasurable nerve endings – but many of them receive pain as well. Anal fingering can be extremely pleasurable or painful, if you don’t do it right. Never tried it before? Here’s how.

Use Plenty Of Lube

You may already know this, but there’s no mistaking the importance that a good amount of lube does for anal sex or any kind of anal play – including fingering. Don’t try to use spit, saliva or oil as a lube – it’s just not going to work. Instead, make sure you have a bottle of water based or silicone based lubricant on hand before you ever get started.

A scented lube can work really well for anal fingering, because not only do they work well, but they smell great too. Your lover may be apprehensive that they will smell bad if you’re that close to their nether region, but if they’re showered first and if you use a scented lube, it most likely won’t be an issue at all.

Never use a desensitizing lube when engaging in anal play. While it may seem beneficial to make sure your lover can’t feel it as much, that means you can do more damage than you intended to and not have any clue that you’re doing it! Your lover will wake up in the morning sore or bleeding, and won’t ever want to try it again!

Start With One Finger

This may seem like a no-brainer, but many people get so excited to try anal fingering with their lover that they try to use more than one finger to start off with. This won’t work very well and may cause  intense pain or discomfort. It’s important to start with one finger (your pinky finger if your hands are extremely large and your fingers are thick) until your lover gets used to the sensation. Once your lover seems to be enjoying it and is well lubed up, you can work on introducing more fingers, one at a time.

Give Them Oral Sex First – And During

For your lover to enjoy the sensations you’re giving during anal fingering, they have to be really, really turned on first. Even with plenty of lube, you’re still going to have a difficult time inserting your finger if their anal muscles are tight and not relaxed. So spend some time getting them turned on first, through foreplay and oral sex. Oral sex is an excellent precursor to anal fingering, simply because it is such an erotic activity.

Lube your finger up and slip it slowly into your lover’s anus while you’re performing oral sex on them. They will be more apt to enjoy the feeling than shy away from it, simply because what you were doing before already felt so good!

Wear Gloves

Consider donning a latex or vinyl glove before anal play. It may make you feel a little awkward, but your lover will appreciate it. You may think you have your nails trimmed and your cuticles cut, but if your hands are at all callused – as in, if you do any work for a living at all – your fingers are going to hurt your lover. Ladies, acrylic nails can hurt a man when you’re trying to massage his prostate gland!

Invest in a good box of gloves and keep them around for using during anal fingering. Your fingers will go in much more smoothly, especially with enough lube on hand. Also, it will protect you from getting bacteria and solid waste under your fingernails! Just be aware that petroleum jelly or oil based products will break down condoms and latex gloves!

Go Slow!

When you’re first fingering your lover, don’t be tempted to go too fast. It’s easy to go fast when you’re excited, but you can really hurt your lover this way. Instead, take your time and go slow. Build up their pleasure with oral sex while you massage their anus. Even if you can only slowly get your finger in and out once, you’re doing good for your first time.

You may not even get to have a really amazing session the first time you try anal fingering with your lover – the first time may actually be just “trying” it. Your lover isn’t sure what to expect and they don’t know what it’s going to feel like. The first time might simply be them getting accustomed to what it’s like. The next few times you’ll notice your lover getting more and more into it, as they get used to how it feels and they learn how to get pleasure out of it.

Use A “Come Hither” Motion

Anal fingering is much the same as vaginal fingering. You want to slowly insert the finger, palm side up. Once you get into position, slowly move your finger in a “come hither” motion, as though you would if you were trying to stimulate the g-spot. This is pleasurable for a woman, and even more so for a man, because it stimulates the prostate gland.

Many people make the mistake of thinking anal fingering is pushing the finger in and out of the anus. This is not going to be pleasurable at all! In fact, insertion and pushing past the tight sphincter muscles is actually the most painful part and only when it’s over can the recipient actually begin to experience pleasure. If you’re just pushing your finger in and out, you’re just repeating the worst part of anal fingering over and over again.

Instead, use the come-hither motion to gently massage all the nerve endings on the inside of the anus, and to put pressure on the pelvic floor. Combined with a glove, patience and plenty of lube, you can get your lover to really enjoy anal fingering!

Mutual Masturbation: How To Get Your Man To Try It

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Mutual masturbation can be super fun, but it can be difficult to get a guy into it. Of course, guys love watching a woman masturbate, but a surprising amount of guys are actually too shy to do the same in front of their girl. If you want to try mutual masturbation, here’s how you can get him interested.

Why Isn’t He Jumping At The Chance?

You’d think that the majority of guys would actually be jumping at the chance to not only watch their girl masturbate, but to masturbate with her. While some guys are confident enough to be able to do this, many of them aren’t. Why?

He’s Afraid Of You Seeing His Porn

A lot of guys are too shy to try mutual masturbation because they think they need porn to masturbate – and they’re afraid of you seeing it. Many men watch porn that they would never in a million years want their partners to see. Whether it’s fetish porn that he thinks his partner would be appalled by, or he just doesn’t want to hurt her feelings (because in most guys’ experiences, women are bothered by their men looking at porn). Either way, he may be too shy to try mutual masturbation simply because he doesn’t want to turn on his porn in front of you.

He’s Been Busted Too Many Times For Masturbation

Unfortunately, there are lots of women that think that if a guy is sexually satisfied in his relationship, that he won’t need to masturbate. This couldn’t be farther from the truth! It’s normal and healthy for a man to masturbate – and even watch porn – if he’s in a sexually satisfying relationship. In fact, it’s healthy for women too.

He may also feel shame over masturbation, especially if he grew up being taught that masturbation was wrong or sinful. Not that he doesn’t do it – he does. But he may do it quickly to “get it over with” and may not see it as something pleasurable or even enjoyable, just something that “has to be done.”

Make Him Feel Comfortable With It In General

If the idea of mutual masturbation seems to make him uncomfortable, it could be due to harbored feelings about masturbation. Encourage him to enjoy his self-love. Get him a masturbation sleeve as a gift, and make sure it’s in an easy to get to place with a bottle of lube. Leave him alone in the house for long enough periods of time that he can do it without fear of being interrupted. If you catch him, politely excuse yourself and allow him to continue if he wants.

Also, talk to him about it. Let him know that you do it, and don’t be afraid to let him catch you getting your self love on too. Don’t act ashamed about it and over time, he will learn not to be ashamed as well.

Try Watching Porn With Mutual Masturbation

While just watching you do yourself may be enough visual stimulation to get him off, watching a porn flick with him while you do might help him get even more into it. However, don’t suggest that he pick it out or that he use any of the videos or pictures that he does when he’s alone. Instead, choose a naughty film together. Select one neither of you have ever seen before, or select one and surprise him with it. Ask him if he’d like to watch it, or just put it on loud enough for him to hear it and see what happens!

Let Him Watch You First

Start by letting him watch you first, before you ask him to engage in mutual masturbation. Go slow at first, and give him time to ogle you and really get turned on. Let him watch you touch your clitoris, or use a sex toy on yourself to stimulate your g-spot. Show no inhibitions – spread your legs wide and let him see every bit of what you’re doing. Chances are, with a combination of sexy moves and confidence, he won’t be able to help but touch himself!

Give Him A Great Handjob And Encourage Him To Take Over

You can also nudge him towards mutual masturbation by giving him a great handjob. Make sure you have your sex toy nearby too, and settle in to give him a great handjob. Use lube and start slow, building speed until he’s incredibly turned on. When he’s closer to orgasm (but not too close), replace your hand with his and whisper to him that you’d like to see him do it himself. He’ll most likely happily oblige.

However, you can also get him close to orgasm and then stop, proceeding to touch yourself or use your sex toy. Chances are, he’s not going to be able to stop himself from masturbating while watching you!