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Orgasm Tips: How To Build Her Orgasm In 3 Phases

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For women, achieving orgasm is a process, and a fun one at that.  Foreplay is an essential part of reaching orgasm for a woman. All of the kissing, touching, licking, and caressing are vital parts of sex for the fairer sex, not just stuff you do until you cum. She feels intense delight at the touch of your lips and the stroke of your finger tips.

In fact, there are instances where a woman enjoys the sexual experience, even if she hasn’t climaxed. The more you make a woman feel like she’s special, like you’re really into her and that you’re super turned on by her, the more she will enjoy having sex without without having an orgasm. However, those instances are few and far between, so it’s best if you know how to make give a woman the climax of her life.

There is not a single technique that will absolutely guarantee your woman’s satisfaction, but rather a building of mood and touch that eventually send her over the edge.  Since there’s no “right” way to do it that applies to all women, it’s a bit of a difficult concept for men to grasp, since a warm vagina, or even a fist full of hand lotion, is all it really takes to get where you need to be. Perhaps a better understanding of the phases a woman goes through to reach orgasm is in order.

Phase I: The Beginning

This is the part when she just decided she wants to have sex with you.  When she reaches this stage, her breathing is slightly heavier than normal, and her pulse has quickened.  This can happen at any time – even without you knowing that she wants to have sex with you. That’s why paying attention to her body language is so important! If you notice that she seems to be more “into” you, has started touching you softly or licking her lips, some serious making out just may be in order at this point. While you’re kissing her, let your hands wander all over her body.

Run your fingers through her hair, stroke her back, and even get in a bit of nipple play. If your hands head south of the border, avoid direct contact with her clitoris. Make sure you use slow, gentle strokes. Rubbing your palm slowly and deeply over her vaginal lips is a great way to give her a hint of what’s to come without irritating the parts of her vagina that are ultra sensitive.

Phase II: The Build-Up

Now things are really getting heated up. Her breathing has turned into almost a pant, and she’s probably let out some audible moans.  When she’s in this phase, you can make more direct contact with the clitoris, but don’t just hang out there.  Tease your partner by keeping more indirect contact going, brushing the head of the clitoris every once in a while. Rub the sides of her clitoris along the shaft, and then pinch the head lightly with the pads of your fingers.

Make sure that either your fingers are lubed up before you touch her, or that she’s very wet and you can use her natural lubrication to wet your fingers. Touching her clitoris with hard, dry fingers isn’t going to feel good to her at all. A dab of lube will go a long way here. If you don’t want to finger her, these same concepts can be applied to oral sex as well.

You can also vary strokes and speeds at this point. You may want to rub the head of the clitoris in a circular motion at a high frequency, and then slowly rub the shaft up and down. Experiment with different strokes and play around with her – listen to her cues to let you know which strokes she likes the most.

Phase III: The Big Finish

Phase III is typically signaled by her screaming, “Faster! Faster!”  Now is not the time to mess around or change what you’re doing. Whatever it was that you were doing when she reached this phase is the exact same thing you need to do to finish her up. Some guys get the idea that they need to try something else – for example, when a woman gets closer to orgasm, he may decide that instead of flicking the head of the clitoris with his tongue, that he’s going to lick slowly around her labia. Resist the temptation to change what you’re doing!

Get in there, and get the job done! Zero in on that one spot, and rub it like you mean it. Use quick, circular motions right on the head of the clitoris until you hear her scream in ecstasy! If you don’t change what you’re doing when she starts to enter the third phase and keep at it, following her directions for harder, softer, faster, etc., you’ll bring her to climax in no time.

How To Stop A Breakup In Its Tracks

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A breakup isn’t always inevitable. If you realize a breakup is about to happen, here’s what you can do to stop it – and put your relationship in reverse!

When you are faced with problems in your relationship, it would be easy to walk away and let it fail, while it is harder to stay and work it through. When you are faced with these issues, to keep it in perspective, think of the way you felt when you first met and the reason you fell in love. Remember the good and the bad times you shared, and what makes it worth it.

You know that it takes two to tango, and this applies to your relationship as well. An effort from only one party is not going to prove to be successful.

Realize Why Relationships Fail

Many relationships fail for a number of reasons here are a few of the common ones:

  • High expectations generally happen when entering a relationship viewing everything through rose-colored glasses/spectacles. When these expectations are not met disappointment and frustration soon follow.
  • Financial issues are not taboo between couples. A household budget should be discussed early so you know what is expected of you. It is important to speak up about money issues when they first arise, and not scream about it when you both are angry.
  • Manage your stress. Recognize what stresses you both out and do whatever you can to not fall prey. Too much stress can hamper one’s ability to think and respond properly.
  • Compromise and do things as a couple. Go to a football match with him and take her shopping, or go on holiday together. Don’t be afraid to speak up and tell your significant other what you want and need. No offence to you guys, but you don’t take hints well, so learn to LISTEN, not just hear! Part of listening also involves not get defensive when she speaks to you, be genuine, compassionate, understanding and sincere.
  • Spice up your relationship and go out and have a night on the town together. Bring home flowers and chocolates for no particular reason. Apologize if you have done something to upset her, and surprise her with something that she’s been wanting but do it for “no reason whatsoever” not because it’s her birthday or Valentine’s day.

It Takes Two To Make A Relationship Work

Both of you have to be committed to make this relationship work. Don’t scream, argue and curse, rather sit down, call a meeting and be reasonable and logical about it. Try not to get too emotional, speak calmly when you say what you have to say.

There are an abundance of tips that can stop your breakup, but like with all advice, it may not work in all situations. An understanding of your partner and what your relationship requires can provide you with what you need.

 

 

Female Masturbation: 10 Must Haves For The Bedroom

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Female masturbation is something every woman does – but do you have the right equipment? Don’t use your hands – here’s ten things no woman wants to be without.

Lube

Many girls don’t believe they need lube during masturbation, especially if they’re just using a clitoral vibrator. While this is true to an extent , lube can make things feel a lot better no matter what kind of sex toy you’re using, or even if you’re just using your hands. Dab a bit of lube on to your favorite clitoral vibrator and move it around a bit – you’ll be surprised at how good it feels when combined with the vibrations? The We-Vibe Touch is an excellent toy for this, because with a little lube on the tip, it can feel almost like a real tongue!

Our Recommendation:

A good, water based lube, like Astroglide, is going to be your best bet. Water based lube is compatible with all condoms and sex toys, so you don’t have to worry about degrading your toys with a lube that isn’t compatible, such as silicone lube with silicone sex toys. Water based lube is inexpensive, comes in lots of varieties including flavored, cooling, tingling and warming.

Condoms

When you think of female masturbation, condoms don’t usually come to mind right away, because you’re not trying to protect yourself from getting pregnant or contracting an STD. However, condoms can really benefit you during masturbation. When using a condom with an insertable sex toy, you can often skip the extensive clean up afterwards and just slip the condom off and throw it in the trash. Using condoms with your sex toys can keep them looking and feeling like new for longer.

Also, many sex toys are made with phthalates – a dangerous chemical used to soften jelly or rubber products. Phthalates have been shown to contribute to cervical cancer and other problems. If you use a condom with a sex toy that you suspect or know contains phthalates, you’re protecting yourself from coming into contact with these dangerous toxins.

Our Recommendation:

Any! When you’re using condoms with your sex toys, the idea is to keep them clean and safe – especially if any of your toys contain phthalates. So don’t worry about the brand – get something colorful or something that smells great like chocolate or strawberry!

A G-Spot Vibrator

Every girl needs a g-spot vibrator, especially if she’s never discovered her g-spot. Don’t expect your guy to find it either until you’ve found it first – he’ll probably need you to show him the way and if not, you’ll at least need to know what it feels like first so you can let him know that he’s hit the jackpot.

Our Recommendation:

The Lelo Elise. This vibrator is made with a soft, silky feeling exterior and is curved at exactly the right angle to reach the g-spot easily and quickly. The hard surface  is perfect to help a woman squirt during her orgasm, because soft jellies and products with more “give” just aren’t going cut it if you want a sheet soaking, rock-your-world orgasm.

A Clitoral Vibrator

A clitoral vibrator is also something every woman needs and there are a great deal of g-spot vibrators out there that also have clitoris attachments. However, a clitoral vibrator by itself can provide a lot of pleasure, especially for girls who have never experimented with sex toys before or girls who are virgins and don’t want to use insertable sex toys.

Our Recommendation:

The We-Vibe Touch. This is definitely a must have for any woman’s toy box. It’s small and fits perfectly into a woman’s hand. It’s designed with special curves that fit directly over the clitoris, but you can also use the pointed tip of the toy as a “tongue” when you explore your body. This one is a lot of fun!

A Waterproof Vibrator

Lots of ladies like to masturbate in the shower and there’s a reason why – it’s private, the shower sounds drown out any shouts of pleasure that may escape and the warm water helps get a woman relaxed enough to reach orgasm. All in all, the shower really is a great place for female masturbation! With this in mind, you want to make sure you have a great waterproof vibrator on hand for those times you want to slip in the shower and satisfy yourself before work or after a long hard day on the job.

Our Recommendation:

Again, the We-Vibe Touch because it’s also waterproof! If you’re looking for a insertable vibrator that is waterproof, try the Jack Rabbit (a rabbit style vibrator with both a g-spot and clitoris vibrator) or the Lelo Elise. Both of these a great options when it comes to stimulating your g-spot in the shower.

A Travel Vibrator

Sometimes, a woman needs to let go while she’s on the road. Perhaps your dinner date is so smoking hot that you can’t help but go to the bathroom and polish one off before dessert – or maybe you’re a woman on the go who takes business trips and spends many a night in a hotel room alone. Either way, a travel vibe is something that you really don’t want to leave home without on those days where you know you’ll need to relax a little but aren’t sure when and where you’re going to be able to do it.

Travel vibrators are also a great option when you fly, because most of them are discreet enough that even if they dump your bag out on the conveyer belt at the airport, nobody will know what it is!

Our Recommendation:

The Lelo Mia. This little vibrator is a perfect “purse” sized vibrator and looks like a tube of lipstick when it is closed. Open it up and you’ll find that this vibrator charges using a USB port – which you can leave plugged into your laptop or desktop anywhere (even at work) and no one will have a clue that it’s not a jump drive!

A Small Butt Plug

If you’re into anal sex – or have never tried anal stimulation before and want to – a small butt plug is something you’re going to want to have stored in your sex toy drawer. While anal stimulation isn’t something that girls often think about during female masturbation, a little anal play can really change things up and intensify your orgasm. Think about it – many girls enjoy anal play with their partners during sex or oral sex, but it’s not something they do when they’re flying solo. Why not? Next time you shut and lock your doors for some private time, try slipping in a small butt plug before you get started and see what happens!

Our Recommendation:

The Basix Rubber Works Mini Butt Plug. This small, slim butt plug is only 1.5” wide and 4” long, making it perfect for beginners or for ladies who just want a little bit of extra stimulation while they masturbate. Imagine the intensity of your orgasms when you combine anal stimulation with clitoral and g-spot pleasure!

An Erotic Novel Or Magazine

Most guys masturbate to porn – that’s a given. They’re visual creatures who are sexually aroused by visual stimuli – while girls are sexually aroused by mental stimuli. Anything that gets a woman’s imagination going is a great female masturbation companion, but a large majority of ladies don’t actually use anything during masturbation other than their imaginations.

Next time you’re browsing through an adult toy store, check out the erotic novel section. Find a novel or a magazine (one with lots of stories) that entices you and take it home with you. Next time you’re ready to masturbate, read a few paragraphs first and allow your mind and body to really get worked up. Your orgasm will be more intense and an even greater release.

Our Recommendation:

Anything that turns you on! There are tons of erotic novels in adult toy stores, and there are also some great resources online that are free. Browse around and find something that really gets you hot!

Something Comfortable To Wear

You don’t want to try to masturbate in your work clothes – it’s just not going to allow your mind to let go of your inhibitions and really get into it. So slip off whatever you wore that day and get into something comfortable – whether it’s your favorite lingerie or even just a comfortable camisole that you love. You can even go nude! Whatever you choose to wear, make sure it’s comfortable and allows you to completely relax and focus on your pleasure.

Our Recommendation:

A soft cotton nightie that is lightweight and breathable – and washable!

Your Favorite Relaxation Techniques

Ladies usually come home from work with their minds all wrapped up in their to do lists, dinner plans or taking the kids to practices, etc. The fact is, if a woman isn’t relaxed and she hasn’t purged the daily “crap” from her mind before female masturbation, she isn’t going to get anywhere. It’s like spinning your tires in the mud. Take a few minutes before your masturbation session to relax and put the thoughts and the feelings of the day completely away.

Our Recommendation:

A hot bath and a glass of wine (if you’re of age) does wonders to get your body relaxed before masturbation. Do whatever it is you need to do to get rid of the day’s stresses and focus on yourself and your pleasure.

5 Tips To Make A Handjob More Exciting

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A handjob isn’t something a woman often gives her guy because he can do it himself, right? Why would he want to feel her hand on his penis when he can just as easily use his own – besides, he knows what he likes. However, a handjob given by a girl isn’t quite the same as masturbation – it can be even better. Surprise him with an incredible handjob TONIGHT with these hot tips.

Hey Dan and Jenn. I wondered if you had any advice on giving my boyfriend a handjob. Every time I do it, it’s just seems so boring for the both of us. It takes ages for him to climax and he says he likes it, but it doesn’t seem that way. It would be nice to get some advice since I don’t always feel like having sex, and I don’t feel like giving him a blowjob every time I dont feel like having sex. Thank you.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aw3-ZT-8QWM&feature=channel_video_title[/youtube]

Attitude Is Key

There’s a reason that what women do in porn flicks is so popular – because no matter what they’re doing, they act like they’re completely enthusiastic about doing it. If you’re giving your man a handjob and you’re acting like you’ve got better things to do (even if you really do), he’s not going to be as into it either. On the other side of the coin, if your attitude says that there’s nothing that you’d rather be doing besides giving your guy manual pleasure (even if there is), he’s going to get more and more into it.

Make Sure You’re Using A Good Lubricant

A handjob without lube isn’t going to feel very good at all. Make sure that when you’re giving your partner manual stimulation, that you have a generous amount of either water or silicone based lube on hand. Contrary to popular belief, saliva isn’t a lubricant.

Even if you produce enough saliva to completely coat his penis, it will dry out quickly and it really doesn’t feel that good. If you’re using a good lubricant during a handjob, it’s going to feel better for him (a lot better!) and it’s going to be much easier for you. You won’t have to work as hard to stroke his shaft up and down because the lube will make things smooth and slippery.

Use A Vibrating Bullet

Some guys don’t respond to vibrations on their penis, but some really do! Take a bullet vibrator and hold it in your hands while you give your man a handjob. It’s definitely a little different sensation, but if he likes vibrations, then he will REALLY like this! Another thing you can do with a vibrating bullet or egg is to place it firmly underneath his scrotum, right on the perineum. This will stimulate his prostate gland from the outside, which is a great option for men who are squeamish about anal sex or anal stimulation of any kind.

Remember that it’s okay to use props during a handjob – just because it’s a “handjob” doesn’t mean that you can’t use sex toys too – such as vibrators, anal stimulators, prostate massagers or even masturbation sleeves. In fact, a masturbation sleeve can feel divine for a guy getting a handjob – because so many of them feel close to the way a mouth or vagina feels – and it makes giving him pleasure completely easy and stress free.

Handjob Techniques

With the right attitude, some lube and maybe some props, giving a handjob doesn’t have to be about technique at all. However, for those women who really want a great technique to use to give their man an orgasm manually, these techniques are tried and true:

Twist And Shout

Grab the base of his penis and pull the skin tightly towards his groin. Use your other hand to stroke his shaft up and down (with lube), while rotating your wrist in a “twisting” motion. The idea behind this technique is that you’re tightening the skin and twisting – so it feels completely different than the way he masturbates himself.

Bookends

Place your palms together as though you were praying, and then slip your man’s penis in between your hands. Your hands should look like a pair of bookends on either side of his penis. Lightly put pressure on his penis as though you were pushing your hands together, and then move your hands up and down to stroke his shaft.

Add Some Great Products To The Mix

You can make a handjob even better for your man by adding some great products to the mix. For example:

  • Use a sensitizing lube to make his penis more sensitive and responsive to your touch
  • Use a male masturbator, such as the Super Head Honcho Masturbator by Adam & Eve
  • Use warming or cooling lubes to give him different sensations
  • If he really likes cool sensations, tease him with an ice cube

Remember that giving a handjob is all about having fun and giving your partner great pleasure. It doesn’t have to be perfect and it doesn’t even have to end in a climax – although, that is definitely a much anticipated bonus! Relax and have fun, and don’t worry about “doing it wrong” or things getting “boring.” Experiment with different techniques, lubes and props and a handjob will never be the same again – for you or your partner!

How To Plan An Incredible Date

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Dating involves coming up with new ideas for dates all the time – check out these amazing tips if you really want to add the “WOW” factor to your next date!

Whether there’s a special occasion on the horizon, like your significant other’s birthday, or it’s just your turn to decide on Friday night’s date, you can make plans that will impress your partner. A little effort and forethought can go a long way toward coming up with a fantastic date concept.

How To Plan The Perfect Date

The key to planning the perfect date is to build it around your mate’s interests. In an ideal world, you’ll be able to find points of interest that you both share. Sometimes, however, you’ll find that you need to go with some ideas that won’t be quite as enjoyable to you as they are to your S.O. Either way, by demonstrating that you’ve paid attention to your partner’s interests, you will be sure to impress and please them.

So start mulling over your mate’s favorite activities, and think back to anything they might have mentioned in recent conversations. Is he/she a music fan, a sports fanatic or a film buff? Whether they’re a foodie, a bookworm, or a theater lover, try to find an out-of-the-ordinary event tied to their big interest.

How To Find Great Date Ideas

Check out the internet or the arts and entertainment section of your local newspaper for upcoming events. Then start thinking outside the box. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is an art lover, see if the city nearest you has a gallery crawl night. It’s like an extra-special trip to the museum. If she is in love with boos, take her to a reading by one of their favorite authors at a local bookstore.

If there’s not a particularly fitting event coming up, try finding a learning experience you can enjoy together. If your S.O. is a gourmand, try taking a cooking class or going to a wine or coffee tasting seminar. If you’re both fitness fiends, look for a walk-in yoga or kick boxing class to attend. Learning experiences are the dates that keep on giving, whether you end up signing up for more classes together or practicing your new skills as a team at home.

Great Dates Can Last All Day – Or Night!

Another key to planning the perfect date is going beyond one simple event. Don’t just buy two tickets to a hard to find foreign film playing at the art house theater near you. Make a full night or afternoon of it. Plan a meal before the movie at a nearby restaurant that serves your S.O.’s favorite kind of food. Then, after the film, grab coffee or drinks together at a new bar or café you haven’t gone to before.

Experiencing new places and things together helps give you both unique memories together. Likewise, you can go the opposite route and recreate elements of a favorite date from earlier in your relationship. Demonstrating that you paid such great attention to a previously beloved evening can be very romantic.

Planning A Theme Date

Going so far as to plan a theme for your date can also be very impressive. Say your boyfriend or girlfriend is a big jazz lover, and you get tickets to see a jazz band perform. Try planning a ‘50s beatnik evening, starting at a coffee house before the performance followed by dinner at a French bistro. You don’t have to dress the part or anything, but that extra attention to detail shows your S.O. how much thought you put into your date ideas.

Even a night in can be more fun with a theme. Instead of your normal Friday night of pizza and TV, try surprising your mate with something unexpected. A homemade Moroccan dinner followed by mint tea and Casablanca on DVD can make for a great evening. In the end, if you show that you considered your partner’s unique tastes and took the time to plan something special, you’ll be sure to have an amazing time together.