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How Foreplay Affects A Woman’s Sexual Arousal

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Foreplay is the very first step in sexual arousal. How do you do that? Tease your girl into an orgasmic oblivion! There are a whole host of things that happen during the “foreplay” phase, all of which propel her further towards explosion. Here are some things to look for during that process, as well as what to do to get her moving smoothly along the path to orgasm.

What Happens To A Woman’s Body During Sex

As soon as your partner starts thinking about sex, her body begins to change. The hormone oxytocin overloads the brain in a rushing flood. This same hormone makes women want to cuddle after sex, and motivates them to bond with their newborn babies after breastfeeding. She gets ’emotionally stoned’ on this hormone according to author Theresa Crenshaw, and she needs more and more of it to flow through her circulatory system in order to orgasm.

As the blood starts pumping harder and faster throughout the body, the skin around her face, chest, back and inner thighs will start to flush, turning a deep pink or red. Some folks call this the ‘glow’ of arousal, although really it is more of a glow signalling readiness for an increase in stimulation than an indication of her proximity to climax. More blood gets diverted to her pelvic region as well with similar effects. The labia will turn dark purple instead of a mere flush. The closer she gets to orgasm, the darker the hue.

Why Teasing Makes Her Body React Better

Wherever she gets flushed, she’ll also become more sensitive, as there’s more blood flow to the nerve endings around her body. Nibbling her ears when she’s excited for example has a different reaction than when her body is unprepared. Her breasts and nipples get larger as she moves through the foreplay phase of arousal, and may take on a defined pinkish color as well. Playing with her breasts and nipples during this state increases the amount of oxytocin in her blood as well. In some women this is so prominent that she’ll be able to orgasm from this stimulation alone.

Vaginal lubrication begins during this phase as well, from two tiny ducts that line the opening of her vagina called Bartholin’s Glands. The lubrication helps both moisturize and prepare the vagina for penetration, not to mention getting the clitoris ready for full-on play.

How To Tell When She’s Ready For Sex

The best ways to figure out if she’s moved from the foreplay stage to a point where she’s getting ready to work toward climaxing is to look at her clitoral head. Keep a close look when she is not aroused; her clitoral head won’t be visible to the naked eye, difficult to find during fingering, or downright impossible to locate.

When she’s aroused, the clitoral head peeks out from underneath the protective hood, essentially saying, “I’m here and ready to come out and play!” Before her clitoral head peeks out she’ll prefer light, indirect touches, like light circles around the head, but not directly on it. Pressure along the front commissure is also pleasurable to help arouse her more. Once the clitoris emerges from its hidden place, you’re free to press with firm pressure and venture right for the nub of pleasure.

Clitoris 101 – What It Is, Why You Need To Touch It & How To Do It!

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The clitoris. This is the GRAND MOMMY of them all, the main moan zone. If you want to score, and score big, this is where you go.

Women have penises too, we call theirs the clitoris. It’s a small bump or button a few inches above the vaginal opening. And if you examine it very closely, you’ll see that it does look like a very small penis. And true to that nature, it can engorge with blood and go erect. It also has a tiny shaft which feels like a thin bony cord.

Why The Clitoris Exists

The clitoris exists for one good reason – to give PLEASURE. Although size doesn’t give it justice, which is why some guys have a hard time finding it, its role is nothing to sneeze at. The concentration of nerve endings at the pleasure bud is tremendous, to say the least. Easily by the thousands, it is one of the most heavily innervated part of a woman. It packs in one very tiny area nerves similar in number to that of the penis!

Why are nerves important, you ask?

Because they connect to the brain. Stimulating the clitoris sends bliss impulses that rock her brain silly. The CAVEAT, however, is that the same nerves that make it sensitive to pleasure, also make it sensitive to pain. So you gotta take it easy.

How Big Is It?

4 inches!

Not many people know this, but the clit is more than just a button or a bump, much of it is not visually accessible. What people refer to as the “clit” is just the head of the clitoris – like the head of your penis. When we say that it looks like a knob, this is what we’re talking about. Unseen is the organ branching into 2 forks, extending down and passing along the vaginal opening and terminating near the anus.

Inside, a woman’s clitoral system really looks like a thick wishbone. But for our purposes here, we will talk about what you see the outside.

How Do You Find It?

Your landmark will be the inner-smaller lips, or labia. The inner lips are very easy to spot, they look like petals or misshapen tongues and are usually darker than the rest of the vulva. Do an upward trace of the lips. You will notice that both left and right lips converge at the top. The clitoris sits on top where both lips converge.

The clitoris is sheathed inside a hood of skin, similar to the foreskin your doctor may have removed when you were circumcised. Sometimes, you really have to push back the blanketing hood to unveil the knob. Be wary of doing this though, because if she’s not sufficiently aroused, this can hurt!

At times, when she’s really hot, the knob will retract under the hood and won’t be visually accessible. This isn’t bad news – it does this on its own when she’s excited and nearing orgasm.

Why Is The Clitoris Important?

ORGASMS. Ring any bells? Any bells at all?

Orgasms are a woman’s best friend as they are these waves of contractions that bring intense pleasure. They are 21 birthdays, Graduation, Wedding & Driver’s License rolled into one – fleeting slices of heaven that transform even the most prim & proper of ladies into cussing savages.

The clitoris is the main organ that serves her these orgasms, it’s little wonder why millions of research dollars and entire lives have been spent studying it. Compared to the g spot, for example, the clit is the more consistent server of climax. In fact, many women orgasm only via clitoral stimulation. You can thrust like hell for hours, use all types of lube, but as long as the clitoris isn’t in on the action, a woman won’t budge.

Before you get flushed with excitement and channel all sexual energy on her pleasure bud, consider this – the clit may look like a button, but it doesn’t function like one. Do not make the mistake of immediately feeling for it and expect a girl to shoot up the horny-meter. Not so.

Use Indirect Stimulation

How is indirect stimulation possible?

Reviewing how the vulva is configured, you’ll see that the clitoris sits on top of the inner labia. During intercourse, a thrusting penis tugs on these lips – which consequently tugs on the clitoris. In short, intercourse stimulates the clitoris indirectly.

The problem for women is that this indirect stimulation is grossly insufficient to result in climax. Although there are women who cum by penetration alone, most women don’t. Your penis just going in and out of her vagina just won’t do the job. You have to give direct clitoral stimulation while thrusting.

How do you do this?

Do THE GRIND.

The key here is pelvic & hip movement that provides both pressure and friction. Not the inside friction between penis and vaginal walls, but the friction caused by pressing and rubbing your pubic bone on her clitoris.

Because of the clit’s location, forward-backward thrusting won’t avail much, but by sensually grinding your bush area, you let the pleasure bud in on the action. Actually, your pubic bone has a better chance of delivering her orgasms than your jimmy, it can give DIRECT clitoral provocation.

So when you penetrate, don’t pull-out immediately, keep your member inside. In this position, you can directly stimulate her clit by rubbing your pube against it. Grind in circular and “8” motions. (Be sensitive when she guides you by placing her hands on your buttocks, or when she synchronizes with your movements.)

The grind creates a huge, HUGE difference in your woman’s orgasm potential. It’s more effective than bouncy moves because it stimulates the same area women excite during masturbation!

5 Most Common Kissing Mistakes

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Kissing tips aren’t rocket science but you’d be surprised at how many guys mess it up! Girls are always talking about how bad guys are at it and wishing they could give them kissing tips. Are you making these fatal kissing mistakes?

1. Bad Breath

It just really ruins both your game and the mood. Knights in shining armor don’t have halitosis – they smell minty. You may be no knight, but that does not give your mouth license to smell like sewer. Bad breath is a major turn-off and a deal breaker, she’ll kick you back to the Middle Ages.

The easiest, fastest way to mask smell is thru mouth wash, mouth spray or mints. But if you’ve got rotting teeth inside, who would want to suck on that? So march up to your dentist and have it fixed. Yes, it will probably hurt, so get over it.

Drink plenty of water and stay away from stuff like onions, cigarettes and alcohol when you know you’ll be making out. (Brushing 4 hours prior is useless.)

2. Immediately Slipping Her The Tongue

There’s time for that. Play the whole game and begin with lip-on-lip action without the tongue. Relax your lips, and don’t push on hers like you’re grating them back to her teeth. Get busy with her luscious reds first, both the upper and lower sets. Make use of head and neck motions to slide lips past each other.

When you do slip her Mr. Tongue, don’t give it all away. Reveal him bit by bit. And when you’re already frenching away, draw him back every once in a while and make her chase you. Pull back and tease!

3. Ramming Your Tongue Down Her Throat

That is not cool. Passionate kissing is good, but thrusting too deep is highly invasive, you’ll make her gag. (When that happens, kissing’s over.) If she badly wants your tongue, she’ll be sucking and swallowing it down herself, so don’t force feed her. Keep focus on the first 1-1.5 inches of her tongue.

4. Thinking That Kissing Only Happens During Foreplay

Don’t leave all the kissing (and caressing) outside the bedroom door during foreplay. If anything, you need to hand-out more of those during sex, throughout the sack session. A woman will always want to be kissed, and everytime she recounts a wonderful encounter, it always involved a lot of mouth action.

5. Thinking That Kissing Only Involves Mouth To Mouth Action

This is rarely so. Around 80% of the time, the lips are not the target of a kiss. You can kiss virtually anywhere there’s skin. Neck, shoulders, back. Take advantage of your lip’s & tongue’s softness and make her body quake.

How To Get Out Of A Sex Routine

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Sex tips are essential for spicing up your lovemaking, especially if it’s gotten monotonous. Try out these red hot sex tips TONIGHT!

How Does Sex Get Boring?

First, let’s look at how something as wonderful as sex becomes so pathetic. It has a lot to do with settling down – settling down to habits and set expectations.

As we said of most sexual relationships, knocking boots begins hot, hot, hot! Life was good, it was freakin’ good! Then, it kinda gets simply warm – still nice, but not as hot as before. Then, after some time, sex with the same person loses much of its initial appeal. It gets colder and colder. Soon it gets so frigidly cold, nobody wants to shed their clothes anymore!

One of the suspects could be monotony.

How Predictability KILL Your Sex Life

Sex habits and predictability aren’t bad in and of themselves. When utilized properly, they afford stability in sexual relationships by creating an atmosphere that’s both familiar and safe. This is the good light of them.

What’s wrong with doing what you love over and over in the first place? Your fave sex positions, even foreplay mannerisms, all reflect personal preferences – and you love them because they have worked for you in the past. Blending them into an evening of pleasure makes for efficient & effective sex, and proficient & competent partners. – UP TO A POINT.

Trouble begins when, after discovering what works, couples become one-hit-wonders and stop trying out other stuff. They become so engrossed with what they like and get too lazy with the rest. Before you know it, they’ve been doing the same thing for the last 35 years!

A sex schedule for example, can be helpful, but if it kills all the spontaneity, then it can also work to your disadvantage – sex becomes predictable. Habits make that which is wonderful look so ordinary and mundane – robbing it of its appeal. Throw in laziness & apathy and you have a deadly combo.

And here’s the kicker – predictability suits men.

Why He Loves The Monotony

Guys love efficiency and predictability in getting their orgasm. But oftentimes, the same can be flat out disadvantageous for women, so that while a man may be enjoying a sexual custom, your girl could be harboring a loathing for it.

Habits, even the good ones, have the tendency to degrade into its core elements (i.e. penetration & ejaculation). While in the past, it may have worked just fine, it can degenerate over time. It used to be good when he used to engage her in finesse foreplay, penetrated her with gentlemanly flair, and finished her off with his tongue. (In this context, the habit works for the couple.)

But over time, the kisses, caresses and eye contacts diminish ‘til they become ancient history. Now, only penetration and ejaculation elements remain and what used to be hot and passionate has gone tasteless and dry.

Beat predictability to death and it will eventually kill your sex life. Can you now sense the potential dark side?

But can you also see that you can do something about it?

Heat It Up!

The most powerful aphrodisiac in the world is not a plate of oysters – it’s NOVELTY. It’s the allure of something new, something unknown and something you may never have done before. It’s the freshness of the unfamiliar, the excitement of not knowing what’s happening, or the vagueness of it.

It’s the newness of things that make intimate encounters both exhilarating and refreshing. Do you know why romantic-scented-candles-and-sensual-music set-ups work? Because they don’t happen every night. They require work, so men save them for special occasions.

Watch what happens when such romantic gestures happen on a nightly basis. Right! The sweet set-up gets old, no matter how grand they may be. Suddenly, the scented candles cease to be so “Awwww,” they become signs of a gross inability to pay electric bills.

Habits serve well by keeping us from stumbling in the dark, but sometimes, human beings need to stumble in darkness to see the light. Sometimes we need unpredictability and unfamiliarity in order to feel alive. Come to think of it, these standards don’t really improve our sex lives, they merely make it stable. “Stable” is usually not enough, and oftentimes, it gets mistaken for “boring.”

But you should know that falling into some sort of habit is human nature, everybody yields to it. But just as everything else, there exists in our nature a counterpoint that balances our fondness for habits and stability – that’s our desire for novelty.

Trying New Things & Using Your Imagination

Novelty is the perfect antidote. When sex becomes a stale act, give your vintage moves a rest and bring in SOMETHING NEW.

This “something” could actually be almost NOTHING. For you’re not required to radically alter sexual practices, it just takes little touches to spark erotic encounters to life. Don’t think extreme, excessive or extravagant. If you can enrich just a tenth of the experience, she’ll love it – a single touch technique for example, can make a huge difference.

This “something” could be ANYTHING – even something totally unrelated to sex. (And I want you to really open your eyes for this one.) Just as anything in a room can be a deadly weapon – telephones, vase, pillow, keyboard (depends on how you use it and where you strike), anything can be a sexual weapon. Anything at all!

For example, a piece of smooth stone may have nothing to do with sex, but under the hands of a creative lover during an erotic massage, it can do magic.

And so we arrive at the concept of PERSONAL CREATIVITY.

As always, everything starts in the mind, with YOUR IMAGINATION. A lot of imagination is rendered next to useless in this world of comfort zones. You are lounging everyday, carrying the most exciting and insightful sexual ideas in your head. Free your imagination, let your regular thinking patterns, your normal, your usual take the first beating.

But do it in your own pace.

You and your girl will have that initial hesitation reminiscent of human beings trying out something new. But that’s okay. It’s totally understandable, part of the charm actually. And when it works, it works! If not, then move on to a thousand other things.

Creativity is the super highway to novelty. It is the blank check with which new sexual experiences are written. Creativity looks at a woman’s body in a different way, frames sex into new exciting perspectives and reveals avenues and alleys before unnoticed.

It diversifies sexual practices into variations never even thought probable. And the beautiful thing about it is unfettered creativity ALWAYS WORKS! It never fails you when you give it a chance. It keeps trying ‘til it hits pay dirt. CREATIVITY is innovative, imaginative, artistic and resourceful.

How To Be An Alpha Male

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Dating tips are essential for scoring women – and you have to be in control if you want to do that. Step up and be an alpha male with these helpful dating tips!

An alpha male is something that a lot of guys strive to be, but ultimately fail at. Being this kind of guy can lead to a lot of dates and respect from co-workers. It’s important to remember that being an alpha male can easily bleed from your dating life into your work life. Standing up for yourself and not avoiding conflict can liberate you from the pack while helping you gain confidence.

The metamorphoses into an alpha male cannot happen overnight. You have to condition yourself for it. Once you have mastered this persona, you should see a lot more dates and have a better perception of yourself throughout your career. Here are some ways that you can develop your inner alpha male.

Thinking Is Being

An alpha male is more confident than the rest of the guys around him. While you don’t have to be a complete dick, offering an opinion that goes against the grain and not being afraid to be yourself is a trait that you should be striving for. Have a good attitude and think highly of yourself.

These kinds of guys have minimal insecurities when it comes to women. They don’t let women push them around and they don’t play games. Think of yourself in this light and you will start to see yourself as the kind of guy that you want to be.

Keep Your Fitness In Check

Alpha males are physically fit. You don’t have to be a gym rat, but you should start thinking about getting into shape if you want to adopt this persona. Running 2-3 times per week is enough to help shed some of your winter weight. Think about investing in some small weights to keep around your house. Having decent biceps and a good chest can change your confidence level immensely.

Join a gym if you have to, but make sure that you are getting into shape. It’s going to be hard to implement your new alpha persona if you are self-conscious about your body.

Don’t Try Too Hard To Qualify Yourself!

In most dating situations, the guy will try to qualify himself to the girl. This is seen through bragging about his education, job or income status. You never want to qualify yourself to the girl. You want to be the guy that has women qualifying themselves to you. Have you ever been in a bar and seen a guy trying way too hard to get a girl’s attention?

Maybe they’re being too loud and telling stories about the big deal they just closed. These guys are paper-thin and women see right through it. You don’t want to be that guy. Being an alpha male is about conveying confidence without looking like you’re trying.

Ban Jealousy From Your Life

Alpha males do not get jealous. One of the most common characteristics of men is that they get jealous when their girlfriends or potential dates are hanging all over another guy. Because this is a common characteristic of men, women know how to use it to their advantage. If they are not getting the attention they want or they are simply trying to make you jealous, it is in your best interest to not respond. Your goal is to go against the grain.

When a girl is trying to make you jealous and you show that it doesn’t bother you, she will take notice. She will start thinking, “Why isn’t he getting upset?” Even if it does make you angry, don’t let it show.

Ban Neediness From Your Life

There is nothing more pathetic than a guy that is needy or clingy. If you have ever been accused of being needy or clingy, it’s time to make a change that will stick. Calling or texting all the time, having to see her every day or inviting yourself along to different events displays clinginess and neediness. If you feel the need to call all the time, set up a schedule. Make sure that you’re not calling her every day. Call her every 2-3 days so that she knows that you’re interested, but that you’re not needy.

Women can’t stand a needy guy and alpha males do not need to have women around them. Jealousy shows insecurity. You should have enough confidence in yourself to know that she is not going to be interested in other guys after she meets you. Resist the temptation of calling and texting, especially the day after a date, and you should start to see more positive results. When you do call or text, she will be a lot more open to seeing you again.