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11 Ways To Get Your Girlfriend Back

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Talk is cheap and you need money to pay the rent – or a better way of stating it is you need to fill the hole in your heart that’s been left there after a breakup. It’s time to act rather than speak. What is it they say, “Actions speak louder than words.” She’s not taking your calls, so these are the type of things you need to do:

Leave Flowers & A Note In Her Car

If she drives her own car, leaving a red rose on her windscreen with a hand note from you explaining that you know words are cheap and that you ask her to give you a chance to show her why the two of you are meant to be together. You need to leave a little hint of a proposed romantic rendezvous that gives enough information to show your sincerity but not too much so as to create an allure.

Leave Flowers Or A Gift On Her Doorstep

If she has moved out and is living with a friend/sister or parents, make sure that you do the same but leave it on her/their doorstep at a time you know she will definitely find it.

Don’t Give Her A Chance To Rethink

Ensure you have set the romantic date for the following evening (which you have planned well in advance) so that she does not have time to get 100 negative input ideas from over-protective friends and family.

Make Sure You Look Good!

Deck yourself out in the most attractive NEW clothes you can find, have a haircut, shave and use an aftershave she cannot resist.

Surprise Her With A New Place

Choose a restaurant that you two have never been to, that is extremely romantic, make sure you book the secluded corner table, even ask for a separate dining room/area if possible and arrive EARLY.

Treat Her Like A Queen

When she gets to the table (which she will if you have done what we tell you), then make sure you stand up as she approaches and treat her like a queen, pulling out her chair, and after you sit down, look at her, drink her in and hold her eyes with yours as you tell her how exceptionally beautiful she looks. Before she can scoff at her compliment (which she might view as a superficial compliment), rise from you chair, get down to eye level next her while she is seated in her chair and put your finger gently on her lips and ask her to just listen to what you have to say before she responds.

Explain Yourself – And Apologize

Staying where you are, you tell her how much she means to you, what a complete idiot you have been, how having her gone has left a hole greater than all the black holes in space, in your life. Tell her you are prepared to do anything and keep on doing anything for as long as it takes, even your entire lifetime, to prove this to her.

Kiss Her The Right Way

When you leave alone that night (a must in this case), ask her permission to kiss her and then kiss her with hedonistic ferocity that leaves her hungry for more, then gently pull back.

Be A Gentleman

Make sure she has a ride home, whether with you, a cabby or walk her to her car, like a gentleman.

Send A Follow Up Text

When you get home, text her telling her how much you enjoyed the evening, tell her how beautiful she looked and that you can’t wait to see her again.

Don’t Let Things Sit For Too Long

Follow up and confirm your next date and don’t leave it too long. There is a reason they call it the “art” of seduction. It involves creativity, patience and time.

7 Ways To Rekindle His Interest In You And Your Relationship

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Are you frustrated that your relationship doesn’t have the magic and romance that it once had? Scared this may affect or eventually end your relationship? You’re not alone. Living with the same partner for a long time can become stable and comfortable, and, as a result, can also cause the loss of the spark that made your relationship so special in the first place. Here are some simple, fun and creative ideas to reignite that magic!

1. Send Your Partner A Unique Gift At Work

Get a piece of paper and some crayons. Draw a bright childlike picture with a smiley sun and two stick figures holding hands. Add labels with your two names pointing to the stick figures. Write “I Love You” inside a heart. Next, get a large formal envelope. Place your drawing inside and type up a formal address label of your partner’s workplace, such as: “For the immediate and urgent attention of: Rebecca Jones, Level 20, Collins & Smith Solicitors, New York.” Mail it to your partner so they receive it in the middle of a busy day. Your partner will feel so surprised when she opens the letter, thinking that it will be something boring that she needs to do for work and instead finding the picture you drew saying that you love her!

2. Become Kids Again

If you are walking by a park, visit the swings and give your partner a ride. Push your partner on a merry go round, or go skating at the skating rink. Grab an ice cream cone as a treat, or play a game of Monopoly at home if it’s raining or the weather isn’t nice. Doing anything that you used to do as a kid with your partner will often bring back happy memories from their childhood as well as yours and make you both feel giddy again.

3. Have Fun With Water

On a hot summer day, buy two large water pistols and take them to the beach with you. If you can’t get to the beach, head outdoors to your very own backyard! Pull them out and throw one to your partner and then have a huge water fight. You can also do the same with water balloons or even just the water hose! You’d be surprised at how much fun you can have when you’re acting like a kid again and how turned on you both will be when you’re soaking wet and panting for air!

4. Bring Back Another Childhood Memory

Contact your partner’s family and ask if there was anything she always wanted when she was a little girl. For example, if she always wanted a porcelain doll, buy one for her birthday. If he always enjoyed a trip to the toy store, take him and let him buy anything he wants. Your partner will not only appreciate the gift, but also the fact that you were thoughtful enough to find out what they always wanted or enjoyed doing as a child.

5. Organize A Picnic In Your Backyard

Spread a picnic blanket on the ground and get together some snacks, sandwiches, chocolates and champagne. Put them in a picnic basket and head outside. Lie down on the blanket with your partner and gaze up at the sky together. You can do this during the day or at night, depending on whether you want to be looking at clouds or stars. You can go to the park too, but if you have a fairly private backyard, you don’t have to worry about people catching a glimpse of you and your partner if you start kissing or decide to get a little frisky.

6. Show Your Partner You’re Grateful For Them

Leave a long-stem rose where your partner will find it, with a note on it saying, “thank you for coming into my life.” You can also do this with a box of chocolates, a card or anything else that your partner would think is special. Doing small things for your partner on a regular basis is a great way to let them know that you love them “just because.”

7. Spice Up Your Sex Life

Surprise your partner with a little gift after you make love, try new sex positions, learn to give your partner a sensual massage before or after sex,  or just spend some time staring into each other’s eyes and caressing their bare skin before making love. Give her oral sex if you don’t do so very often, or make the night all about her and her pleasure. She can also do this for you too on a different night! Better sex means a happier, closer emotional relationship too.

Space Invaders – When Your Ex Wants Back In Your Life

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This blog is an open letter to all of you space invaders out there.

You know who you are … or do you?

No, I’m not talking to those of you with an affinity for handling joysticks and playing early 80’s video games with poor graphics and creatures making funny “gobbling” noises as they ate things. This open letter has nothing to do with video games.

I’m also not talking rodents or anything else that invades your living space. Hell, I’m not even talking about clutter on your desk.

The space invaders I’m talking about here are ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends (we’ll just collectively call them “ex’s” here). This open letter is directed to all of you ex’s out there who are space invaders out there torturing your ex’s.

Now I know all you space invading ex’s know who you are, and this open letter is directed to you. So listen up and pay attention!

Weaseling Their Way In

It’s amazing. Ex’s always seem to find their way back into your life to drop their shit all over you at the very moment when you’re most happy with someone else. It’s like they have this beacon or special radar which alerts them that it is the perfect time to try to get you back at the very moment you are in this most happy place.

They will have an epiphany wherein they decide they are a new person and that they need to convince you to give your relationship with the “new them” a second chance. In their mind they will think “Wait! My ex is with someone else. How could they possibly be with someone else? I realize now that if we get back together, everything will be different because I’ve changed. They need to give our relationship another try with the new me!”

Here’s the thing that is really so crazy about these thoughts. Your ex is your ex for a reason.

They’re an ex because you already learned the lesson that they did not satisfy you in ways you needed to be satisfied. They are an ex because your heart was not touched by them in ways your heart needed to be touched. Your ex is an ex because they weren’t able to get into your soul and get deep into your core like you needed.

These are the reasons your ex is an ex. The same issues are still there. People don’t change, at least not in these ways. They really don’t.

Ex’s don’t go on some miracle trip or special retreat where the light bulb suddenly lights up over their head and they realize all of a sudden everything in the relationship will be different. The core of each person is still the same.

When an ex all of a sudden decides things will be different and invades your space when you are at your most happy place with someone else, the ex is doing it because in reality they are not happy. Deep down they still have feelings for you, but those feelings are all about their own issues and not about yours.

What To Do About A Space Invading Ex

An ex’s space invading is all about their issues. The only result for you when an ex invades the sacred space you’ve set up with a new person, is that stress will be brought into your life and your current relationship for no reason at all.

So at the first sign of an ex invading your space you need to be totally upfront and honest with your ex about everything. You are doing no one any favors when you “protect an ex’s feelings” by not being totally upfront with them.

By you not being totally honest with an ex, you are actually not protecting them from hurt. In fact, you are really causing them more hurt because you are not making it clear to your ex that there will be no second chance together.

It is also important for you to completely let your past with your ex go in order for you to move forward and have the love that you really deserve. You need to also remember that each time an ex invades your space, it hurts the sacred space you are forming with the person with whom you are currently in a relationship.

You need to be as open and honest with your ex about your feelings about them and about your current relationship as you are with the person you’re currently seeing. The reason you with the person you’re currently seeing is because you feel free to be yourself in the purest form.

Now back to all of you ex’s though, because there seem to be no shortage of ex’s who are space invaders no matter what the situation or what you are told. So I implore you to consider all the following things before you engage in any more space invading activities.

Are You A Space Invader?

It is no coincidence that so many ex’s experience the sudden revelation that they need to get their ex to give their relationship another try ONLY after that ex has found someone else with whom they are genuinely happy. You need to see this “epiphany-come-lately” for what it really is: your knee-jerk reaction to the fact that your ex is with someone else.

It is an only slightly more complicated version of the “you want them only now that you can’t have them” syndrome. While you may believe that you all of a sudden see things differently, it is really a function of feeling like you are about to lose your ex unless you say something right now.

Here’s another thing all you space invading ex’s need to remember. You are not an NFL coach gifted with a red flag that you are entitled to throw a certain number of times during a game demanding the refs review a play. You don’t get to just “decide” that your ex needs to give you and your relationship another chance and invade their space to do it.

Your ex’s touchdown (i.e., the new relationship they’ve found that is making them completely happy) stands. You don’t get to review the play. You don’t get to replay the down. Your ex’s new relationship takes place entirely in the last two minutes of the game and only they get to decide if any plays get reviewed.

Further, just because you believe you are a different person or that “things” are different than when you and your ex were together does not mean that the two of you are more compatible now than you were at the time your relationship ended. It is really irrelevant that you have made some miraculous change or turn-around in your own mind, because what ultimate made your relationship not work out with your ex was about something much deeper than that.

What made your relationship not work out the first time was that the two of you at your cores were different people, people whose hearts and souls did not have an ultimate connection. So while you very truly may have made some changes, deep down you are the same person (and so is your ex). You were two people with whom you did not share that ultimate peaceful feeling you have with someone with whom you share a true soul connection.

Ex’s also seem to inevitably show up at absolutely the most inopportune times. So many space invading ex’s seem to operate under the delusion that they are starring in their own romantic comedy movie.

You know the basic plot line: Boy had girl. Boy loses girl (becoming the “Ex”). Ex doesn’t think twice about girl he lost until girl finds someone else. Ex has “the epiphany” moment that he loves girl and needs to get her back (thus becoming a space invading ex). Space Invading Ex discovers that girl’s new boy is not the good guy that girl believes him to be and that HE is the right man for her. Space Invading Ex sets up large scheme to crash girl’s wedding/relationship and declare his true love to girl. Space Invading Ex gets girl back in entertaining romantic wedding-crashing scene.

Ahh – the tears fly, women frantically search for tissues in their purse. It all seems so romantic! This is great entertainment and is very fun to watch in your local movie theater … but is not a good model to follow in real life.

Life Is Not Always Like It Is In The Movies

Think about what this typical movie plot line involves, and what you have to assume to make it the great romantic story that is shown. First, notice that each and every one of these films rests on the major premise that the Space Invading Ex IS the right man for the girl and that the girl’s current guy is in reality NOT such a great guy.

As we’ve discussed, and as all you space invading ex’s know is true, that is not what is going on in your situation. Your ex is in a relationship with someone who is making them truly happy. You are not Patrick Demsey or Hugh Grant, so you need to stop trying to play the lead in this kind of movie plot with your ex!

Another flaw in these movie plots is that they paint the Space Invading Ex as the “hero” doing his ex a favor by exposing the rotten current boyfriend and having the Ex declare his undying love to her. Think about what you are really doing by being the space invading ex.

When you are a space invading ex into a relationship where your ex is genuinely happy, your invasion into that space is not romantic – it is selfish. Really, that’s what it is in its true sense.

Think about it. When you invade your ex’s space, you are bringing stress not only to your ex but to their relationship. Stated simply, you are bringing unhappiness into your ex’s happy space. The only person who is served by this space invasion is YOU.

Also, consider how you would feel if you were in a relationship with someone and that person’s ex continued to invade your relationship space. How do you think it feels to know that your significant other has been on the phone throughout the day with their ex. Let me tell you how it feels. It makes you feel disconnected with your significant other when someone is invading your relationship space. You can feel it happening. Then when you get emails from your significant other telling you how emotionally drained they feel because their ex keeps calling, it causes you to feel emotionally drained yourself. You become emotionally drained because you start wondering what your significant other’s ex said, and what your significant other thinks and feels about what the ex said.

After connecting with your significant other at an emotional and spiritual level deeper than than you have with anyone in your life, to be in the dark about what was said by an ex is a terrible feeling. You want to be there for them and to help them through this, but you also don’t want to be in the dark yourself. Also, this space invasion causes your ex’s energy to be directed totally away from their currently happy relationship, and into a place where they shouldn’t have to explain themselves.

What If You Want To Be “Just Friends?”

Many space invading ex’s will invade an ex’s happy relationship space under the guise of “wanting to become friends.” This is another very selfish act dressed up as an altruistic one. You can’t be friends with all of your ex’s. It all comes down to whether you and your ex were friends in the first place. If you were, then you would not be invading their relationship space in this way. You would already be a part of their life.

You trying to create this sudden friendship with your ex when it wasn’t there before is again nothing more than a selfish act, because a true friend would not want to cause their friend all this stress and pain. A true friend would see that their ex had moved on and has given their heart to someone else, and would not want to do something to directly disrupt that.

Finally, a bit of advice to all you space invading ex’s. Did it ever occur to you that the reason why you all of a sudden feel the urgent need to get your ex back is that you see them feeling the kind of peace, connection and happiness with someone that you wish you had in your own life?

Instead of invading your ex’s happy relationship space and causing damage to the happiness they are feeling, why not instead take your ex’s happiness as the inspiration for you to go out there and find the same kind of happiness for yourself. This is the perfect time to work on yourself so you can find the same kind of true soul connection that your ex has found.

So, to all of you space invading ex’s, I hope this open letter has opened your eyes to what kind of impact your space invading is really having on your ex and their relationship. If you are someone who still has feelings for an ex who has moved on and found a truly happy relationship with someone else, then it’s time you let them move on and be happy.

It’s time that the only space invading you do from here on out is with a joystick and on a vintage arcade game. Stop pining over an ex who is not the right person for you … and stop torturing that ex you claim to love so much!

Start working on yourself so you can cultivate a wonderful relationship for you with someone with whom you share a true and deep heart and soul connection. Maybe once you find them, the four of you can meet up at an arcade for a friendly game of Space Invaders…

How Can I Get My Ex Back?

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You’re in a relationship and suddenly, before you even know what is happening, it’s over.

You mourn the loss of your relationship and your partner and you wonder where you went wrong.

If you’re lucky, you’ll figure it out, because some people never do. If you’re able to understand what happened to cause the relationship to end, will you be able to get your ex back?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Hi! I discovered your videos on YouTube, and figured you could help me out. I had been with my ex-girlfriend for just over 18 months. Everything was going great for the first 12 mos. We broke up a couple of weeks ago, and I was devastated.  She said things had gotten boring and that the past few months she didn’t really feel like a couple. She said she still wanted to be friends and needed time to think. I haven’t heard anything from her since then. I’m getting worried that she’s forgotten about me and never wants to see me again. I’ve realized where I went wrong.  I just want to know if my ex-girlfriend will ever come back to me and if it’s possible how I can get my ex-girlfriend back. Can you help me!

– Matt, Cumbria, England

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnE7-O5GVys[/youtube]

Realizing the mistakes.

It takes many people a long time to realize their relationship mistakes and even then, the realizations are sometimes biased or one sided. Some people never understand why their relationships end, and this can be frustrating!

You may find yourself in a situation where a relationship has ended and you’re wondering what happened. Take time to really sort out what happened between you and your ex, and what role both of you played in the ending of the relationship. A relationship’s untimely demise is seldom the result of just one person’s actions.

Take a look at what your ex contributed to the relationship’s end, but beware of placing blame all on them. You also need to examine what you contributed to the relationship’s end. If you are able to get to a point where you can truly admit the part you played in what broke you and your ex up, consider yourself better off for it!

Learning from your mistakes.

You’ll never get anywhere if you realize your mistakes but never learn from them. If you’ve figured out what you’ve done that wasn’t right, or that helped bring your relationship to a close, make sure it’s not something that you continue to do in other relationships.

If you and your ex get back together, make certain it’s not something you continue to do in that relationship! You’d be surprised at how many people end up repeating the same mistakes over and over again. It’s important that you use your mistakes as an opportunity to grow and learn.

No one is perfect, and everyone makes mistakes in a relationship. Part of being in relationships is making mistakes, learning from them, and stopping the behavior in its tracks.

Moving on.

You may be tempted to try to get your ex back, and it’s certainly worth a good try. It’s never certain if you’ll be able to mend what was broken, but you’ll never know unless you give it a shot. Try to contact your ex and let them know that you’ve come to a point where you understand how you contributed to the end of the relationship. Find out if they’ll talk to you and if they’ll accept your resolve to make things different the second time around.

This doesn’t always work, however, and sometimes your partner may not want to pick up where you left off. That’s okay. It may be frustrating and even hurtful, but if your ex doesn’t want to resume the relationship, there’s really nothing you can do about it.

Take this time to cherish what time you and your ex had together and then put it to bed. Learn from your mistakes and take the opportunity to turn something that didn’t happen the way you wanted into something good. Make the next relationship even better! It’s all about growing and learning, and moving on if you have to. Just make sure you’re not repeating the same mistakes over and over again.

Can You Get Your Ex Back With The Law Of Attraction?

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One of the Biggest Law of Attraction Mistakes

The Universal Law of Attraction (LOA) is a very powerful force in our everyday lives. As human beings, we are very powerful attractors and can use this wonderful, God-given, power to attract or manifest more of what we want in life simply by paying attention to where we place our focus, thoughts, and desires.

One of the biggest mistakes that people make with the Law of Attraction is trying to control another person. For example, picturing your ex-taking you back is actually a form of trying to control his or her actions and feelings. You simply can’t control how another person feels or acts, only how you react to their feelings and actions.

Here’s a question from Barry who’s not quite sure how to apply this powerful concept in his own life…

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’ m a 23 years old Taiwanese boy who goes to school in Vancouver BC. When I was 16, I met a girl in Taiwan. Pretty soon after we met, I had to leave Taiwan to return to school in Vancouver. We started a long distance relationship. She met another man in LA, and she overlapped me and him for a while. This was very heartbreaking for me, however I had no doubt in my mind about wanting her back. However, last year (after a 6 year relationship) she broke up with me again for the same reasons.

Since I have read The Secret, I understand the Law of Attraction is to focus on what you want, pretend this is really happening, and accept the fact that it is going to happen. After we broke up, I often pictured the scene of her begging me to take her back again, but I understand that you can never change another person with the Law of Attraction. Is it best me to just move on?

Thank you so much for your time.
–Barry

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5YjwTfNxCM[/youtube]

Focus on What You Really Want

Rather than focus on your ex and getting him or her back, focus on what you really want in a relationship and a partner who is good to you and loves you in return.

You need to stop focusing on your ex…

I know that’s hard but you really have to stop and think about the kind of relationship you do want, but not necessarily in terms of your ex or any particular partner. Focus only on your ideal relationship.

Think of a radio. It has many different stations. To tune into a radio station, you dial up a specific frequency on the dial. As soon as we turn our attention to this certain frequency, it begins its journey to us. We start to experience that radio station. If we want to change it, we simply tune into another frequency.

To change something you no longer want in your life, simply tune in to a different vibration (frequency or radio station) — tune into something that you do want! And whatever you do, don’t dwell on what you don’t want – or you’ll keep getting more of it!

Focus on Your ‘Perfect’ Partner

Visualize the perfect partner for you and focus on what you want to experience together. Focus on how a happy relationship makes you feel. What do you do together? How do you feel when you’re together? What does your life look like with this person?

The Law of Attraction is neutral. You are like a living magnet. You get what you think about, whether wanted or unwanted. So only give your thoughts and focus to what you want!

Stop Telling the Universe HOW to Do It’s Job

Don’t tell the Universe, or God, or Spirit, “how” to give you your dreams or to achieve what you want.

Focus instead on what you want and then choose to be happy with or without it (i.e. your ex). You have to let go of control and trust that the Universe, or God, truly wants all of your dreams to come true. If you’re a parent – think about what you want for your children. It’s not misery and suffering. You want your children to be happy and live a wonderful, fulfilling life. That’s what your creator wants for you as well.

When you focus only on this one particular person, its like telling the universe how to do it’s job. When you say that you only want to be happy if it can be with a specific person, you’re telling the universe that if it doesn’t happen with this particular person then ‘I don’t want it!’. What you have to remember is that this specific person has their own wants and desires, and they may not match up with yours.

Be open to whomever comes into your life, under whatever circumstances. Don’t worry about how it’s going to happen. Let go of your ex and the right person will come along for you. You just have to be looking for them and open to meeting them. You can’t do this if you’re still hanging on to your ex.

The Law of Attraction is working in your life right now, whether you are aware of it or not. You are attracting  people, situations, jobs, and much more into your life this very minute. Stop and answer this: what are you thinking about right now?

Focus only on what you want. And give no energy to the things that you do not want.