Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for Love & Relationships

Romance Tips: How to Make Your Anniversary Truly Special

By

Romance can be hard to come by in a marriage, but your anniversary is coming up and you need some date ideas! Here’s how to fill your anniversary with romance.

Whether your date nights have grown generally boring or you’re looking to really set this year apart from previous ones, your anniversary is a great time to plan a truly special and exciting date. Though some people value anniversary celebrations more than others, no one can resist a spectacular night of celebrating. You don’t even need a big budget to pull off an out-of-the-ordinary date. Plan ahead, consider your partner’s likes and dislikes, and get those creative juices flowing.

Planning Ahead

Depending on what you’re hoping to do for your anniversary, you should start planning anywhere from two weeks out to a full year beforehand. The first two things to take into account are your budget and whether or not you’re getting a gift for your S.O. If you’ve got a sizable budget or have lots of time to start saving money, you can come up with some pretty outlandish date concepts.

If you don’t already have a physical gift in mind, your date can actually become your gift, which then gives your budget a boost. They say that people who spend money on memory-making experiences are happier than those who buy tangible items. Unless you know that your mate expects a piece of jewelry or techie gadgetry every year, give them the gift of a truly memorable time together.

Take them to a concert for a band that they love or to a major sporting event. Do yourself one better and go to something that’s relevant to your relationship. Did you propose at a baseball game? Did you meet at a certain rock club? Go back there and recreate that special night. The tickets are your gift to them, and the awesome anniversary date is built right in.

Go Out Of Town

If your budget goes even further, give the gift of a trip. Plan a weekend getaway. It can be to somewhere that your S.O. has talked about wanting to visit, or it could be to somewhere else equally thoughtful. Maybe you no longer live where you first met.

Go back to the town where your romance blossomed and visit your old haunts. The act of being somewhere other than your current home will instantly spice things up. Demonstrating your thoughtfulness by picking a meaningful destination will show your mate that you’re still in love with him or her.

Local Date Ideas

Of course, if you don’t have the budget for a trip or a more expensive night out, you can still plan a great anniversary date. Plan a night or day full of the things you both enjoy doing most. Eat at you two’s favorite restaurant, grab a drink or two at your favorite bar, and do at least one thing that you both really enjoy.

If you’re both into Latin dancing, find a salsa night somewhere near you. Or if you both love going to the movies, go to a late night showing of something funny or romantic that will put you both in a good mood. Lots of cities have smaller theaters that sometimes show older movies, so you might even be able to find an older favorite of both of yours to watch on the big screen.

Sure, dinner and a movie or drinks and dancing might seem like typical dates, but if you put that extra special spin on it, it becomes a much more interesting night. Just make sure that whatever you do is something both you and your S.O. really enjoy. That way you’re both guaranteed to have a great time. Then head back in for the night and let your great moods carry over into passionate sex.

Low Cost Date Ideas

Should all else fail and your budget be nearly non-existent, remember that a picnic is always romantic, particularly after dark. Even if it’s just in your own backyard, dining al fresco and imbibing a little wine under the stars can make for an incredibly lovely evening. Depending on the remoteness of your location, bring a few blankets along and you could end up creating some extra hot memories, too. You’ll cherish them forever, even if you can’t tell anyone else about them.

Make Her Fall In Love With You – Using Only Words!

By

Love advice can be complicated, but did you know you can make a woman feel love for you just by using the right words? If you choose the right phrases to make her feel happy, excited and warm towards you, she’s going to fall for you fast. Here are the phrases that you need to use if you want to make her go crazy over you!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XBFXA1uGI8&feature=relmfu[/youtube]

Words Are Very Powerful!

Don’t underestimate the power that language has on a woman. Certain phrases can trigger thoughts,emotions and fantasies and can easily affect how a person feels in both good and bad ways. There’s no denying that words can be used to affect someone in many different scenarios. You can also read into the way another person is feeling and thinking by paying attention to the words they’re using in a conversation.

Of course, not just any word is going to make someone upset, happy, angry or excited. It’s the use of emotional language that does that. Emotional language is certain phrases that evoke emotion in someone, whether it makes them feel good or bad or anything in between. You can use innocent words to turn a woman on, or make her feel happy or ecstatic. So it’s no surprise that you can affect how a woman feels just by paying attention to the words you’re using and using the right phrases to make her feel the way you want her to!

Actions Speak Too

Remember that even if you take the best love advice to heart and use the right phrases to win a woman over, you’re still not going to get very far if you don’t follow them up with the right actions. If you’re going to “talk the talk” so to speak, you’ve got to be willing to “walk the walk.” If you say something flirty and nice, and then turn around and do something else that negates what you just said, any girl is going to be able to spot you as a fake. Make sure that your actions go along with what you’re saying and that you’re being genuine about it.

Examples Of Things To Say

Here are some excellent examples of phrases that are going to evoke emotion in a woman:

  • Happy – “I feel so happy being with you!”
  • Excited – “I’m so excited to see you.”
  • Love – “I love it when you….”
  • Adore – “I adore you!”
  • Confident – “You make me feel confident.”
  • Amazing – “I feel amazing around you.”
  • Incredible “You’re incredible!”

Using Words The Right Way

To have the impact you want on a woman when using language, it’s important that you pay attention and use it the right way. Avoid talking about things that create a negative energy around you, such as talking about your problems or complaining about the things around you. If you’re creating negative energy around you, you’re not going to be able to make anyone feel good regardless of what language you’re using.

Pay Attention To The Words She’s Using As Well

Women communicate with words much, much more than guys do. In fact, it’s estimated that women use on average 15,000 words a day while men use about 6,000 – so you can pretty much guarantee that she’s going to let you know how she feels and what she’s thinking in her language, even if she doesn’t come right out and say it. Listen to the hidden meaning behind the words she’s using and look for the emotions buried within.

Is she using phrases that suggest she wants to touch or kiss you? Are the phrases she’s using suggesting that she’s happy or having a good time? If so, you’re definitely on the right track! Alternatively, watch for phrases that suggest she’s not having fun or that she isn’t interested in you at all. A lot of guys don’t pay attention to it when a woman makes it clear that she’s not interested in them, simply because it’s not what they want to hear.

Consider Taking A Language Course

Because women use words so much more than men, if you want to really understand girls and how they think, you might want to consider taking a course on the subject. Becoming more knowledgeable about how people use language and the meanings behind certain phrases is going to help you indefinitely when it comes to understanding and talking to women. If you don’t want to take a course, there is tons of information out there on the Internet to help you learn to understand language and how people use it to communicate with each other!

Long Term Relationship: How NOT To Be A Nag

By

A long term relationship take some effort to keep. Nagging is one of those things that can destroy long term relationships if you let it – here’s how to stop!

Are You A Constant Nagger?

No one likes being called a nag. The term is full of all sorts of negative connotations. Yet all of us have probably done it to someone about something at one point or another. Maybe you find yourself repeatedly asking your mate to put their dirty laundry in the hamper and not on the floor. Perhaps you’ve requested over and over that your partner remember to deposit that check at the bank. Whatever the point of it, you know that it’s no fun being on either end of it.

When you’re the one being nagged, you feel annoyed with your S.O. Their nagging is a reminder that you’re not living up to their standards on this particular issue, and that never feels good. If you’re the one doing the fussing, you feel frustrated and exasperated. It’s not as though you want to get on to someone—you just want them to do something the first time you ask them to do it. The worst part of nagging is that you start to feel more like an angry parent and scolded child than a pair of two adults in a romantic long term relationship.

Are You On The Giving Or Receiving End?

The key to halting this in your long term relationship is being considerate and forgiving of each other. If you’re typically on the receiving end of it, ask yourself why. When your partner asks you do them a favor by picking up the dry cleaning once a week, be considerate of their wishes. Surely that partner does things for you. Maybe you get distracted easily and forget to pick up those clothes. To your partner that seems inconsiderate. That’s why they become annoyed and then get on to you about it.

Since you know that you’re prone to forgetting things, come up with a way to remind yourself, like putting a reminder into your phone. Sure, you might still forget from time to time, but if you do a better job overall, your partner will be more likely to forgive you when you do screw up. That means less fussing for you to have to endure.

Give Yourself A Reality Check

Should you be the one constantly fussing, try to check in with reality. If you’re doing it about little things, you might want to consider letting the issue go. Say your significant other always leaves the dishes on the counter instead of putting them into the dishwasher. This is probably a bad habit of theirs that they’re not likely going to change.

Instead of wasting your time and energy on fussing at your partner about it, just put the dishes away yourself. It probably takes less effort for you to load the dishwasher than it would to regularly complain to your S.O. about it. Don’t ever forget that you probably have a bad habit or two that bothers your mate. You’re not perfect, therefore you shouldn’t expect perfection from them either.

Is The Issue Bigger Than The Little Stuff?

What if there’s a bigger issue at hand than dry cleaning and dishes? Maybe you’ve been nagging your partner to stop smoking or cut back on their drinking. Instead of nagging in the moment, sit down and have a heart to heart with your mate. Do this at a time when you’re both in good moods and the problematic issue is not directly at hand. You truly are trying to help them overcome big problems here, but nagging may not be the right way to go about it.

Tell them how much you care about them, and why you need them to break their unhealthy habits for you. Then you should work together to come up with a plan. Promise them that you won’t be on their back about it every five minutes if they show you that they’re working to get better. Seek outside help or marriage counseling so that you’re not the lone person policing the issue. Above all, make sure that your S.O. knows that you’re doing this because you love them. If they love you as well, they’ll understand how well-meaning you are being.

Do Women Expect Too Much From Men?

By

A relationship is about give and take, but many men think that in a relationship with a woman, they’re doing nothing but giving. Is that true?

What She Said

Umm, no. Granted, I am a woman and you haven’t given us much to go on with this question. In general, society still plays a large part in defining roles of gender and, thusly, behavior. It’s up to us as individuals to unravel what that means in our lives.

What IS Expected Of Men?

I assume you’re speaking from the vantage point of what’s wanted from men and dating, given the nature of our column. I acknowledge that men have certain pressures when it comes to relationships – the biggest sticking point with many guys being the assumption of who pays on dates. We’ve covered that several times here, but I’ll say it again – it’s not how much you spend, it’s the thought that counts. Being honest while living within your means will make for a happier relationship.

Every Woman Wants Different Things From A Man

Since I don’t have much to go on, I’ll tell you what I want from a guy – the same thing I expect from myself. Honesty, respect, communication, love and companionship all rate high on my list. Money, childcare, romance, how much time spent with the in-laws and who cleans the house are common issues. Every couple has different answers as far as these expectations go, but I’d assume the happiest relationships are where the balance of the responsibilities is relatively equal.

If He Feels Overwhelmed

If a man feels that too much is expected of him, he might want to take a look at two things – himself and the relationship he’s in. Expectations are just that – it’s up to you how (or if) you decide to fulfill them. It’s your life and resentment is a terrible waste. Don’t be a victim and assume you have to live up to someone else’s vision. Make your own rules and find a partner who believes in a similar way of life. You can’t control what others want from you (much less an entire gender), but you can control how you react.

What He Said

Do girls want too much from men? Hell yes! You want us to pay, you want us to be nice, but not too nice, you want us to love you for your mind as well as your body, you want us to put the seat down, you want us to want to do the dishes. You want a bad boy, but you want him to be monogamous, you want passion, you want consistency, you want him to have six pack abs, you want him to eat healthy, but not eat like a girl, you want him to last all night and fuck like a porn star, blah, blah, blah.

Is It Too Much?

That’s a lot to live up to. It used to be that girls were the ones burdened with all the unrealistic expectations that society heaped upon them in droves. Now men are getting our fair share. When did that happen? Where’s gender inequality when you need it? Men are starting to be as insecure as the ladies, if not more so, about sex and their bodies. That’s not right! That’s your problem. Not ours! Damn feminism. Damn you Gloria Stenheim!

Wait…what was I talking about?

Being A Supportive Partner When Times Get Rough

By

A relationship go through many ups and downs. Here’s how to be a great spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend in your relationshipp when things are difficult.

For Better Or For Worse

Everyone who’s ever been to a wedding or seen one on TV or in a movie knows the gist of typical wedding vows. There’s a line in there about sticking it out whether you’re healthy or sick, rich or poor. This shouldn’t just apply to married couples, of course. If you’re in a relationship with someone and they fall ill or lose their job, you should be there for them. You would want them to help you through your rough time, so you should treat them in the same manner.

How To Show Love When Things Get Hard

There are so many different ways that you can show your love during tough times. Whether your S.O. has lost their job or a loved one, just being there to listen to them will get you off to a good start. Offer to help where you can, but never be forceful about it. Say your boyfriend just got laid off from his job. Give him a few days to be upset, and then ask if there’s anything you can do to help. If he says he doesn’t need help, keep in mind that his ego is suffering.

Forcing your help on him right now might just make him feel worse and in even less control of his life. So give him space where he needs it. When someone is upset and hurting, it’s important to be observant. Follow their cues and you’ll help them in the best way possible.

Empathy Isn’t Everything

While empathy is incredibly important, don’t ever pretend to understand what your mate is going through if you haven’t been there yourself. If your girlfriend’s parent just passed away, and both of yours are still alive and healthy, you can’t tell her that you get what she’s experiencing. If you do, that could start an argument.

When a person is grieving, they feel like no one can really understand their pain. Your job is to make sure that your mate doesn’t feel alone. Tell her that, even if you can’t truly understand her particular sorrow, you want her to know that you’re here for her. If she needs to cry, yell, or just be held, you’ll be with her for all of it.

Be Throughful

Perform thoughtful acts without being asked to do so. If your S.O. typically does the cooking or the cleaning, take on some of that work so he or she can have extra time to do whatever helps them mellow out. Encourage them to get some form of exercise, which will help them feel better. Gently nudge them out into the outside world so they can’t just sit around all day focusing on their unhappiness. Of course, if they resist, never push them.

Perhaps if they’re not up for going out, you can coax them into watching their favorite funny movie or playing a game they like. Just try to get them smiling again. Sex can also be very healing, though you should try to be understanding if your significant other needs a break. When you’re stressed or depressed, your sex drive can take a real dive, so don’t take it personally if they’re not really in the mood.

Be Kind

Ultimately, the key to being a really supportive S.O. is to make sure that you are there when you’re needed. Be respectful of your mate’s need for alone time as well as together time, and never force things on someone who’s upset. Treat you S.O. kindly during a difficult time, and they will appreciate it on many levels, for many years to come.