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Oral Sex – Do You Need A Condom And Can You Get An STD?

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Oral sex isn’t something that makes you think of STD’s automatically –  you’ve probably heard that the greatest risk for transmitting sexual infections such as HIV, AIDS, chlamydia and syphilis come from anal sex and vaginal intercourse. But can STD’s be transmitted through mouth to genital sex? What do you need to do to protect yourself?

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I am still young and recently had the “talk” and my parents told me to navigate to this channel. Do you have any tips for a person new to the sex world? Also, I was still confused about oral sex and didn’t want to ask my parents. Do you still need a condom and can you get a STD?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prT-oMvekBs[/youtube]

Remember That You Can Only Eliminate Risk Through Abstinence

No matter what kind of sex you’re talking about – whether it’s oral sex, vaginal sex, anal sex or even giving your partner a handjob or fingering them – you’re never 100% safe from sexually transmitted diseases. Even if you use spermicide, condoms or the withdrawal method, there is nothing you can do short of abstinence to completely eliminate your risk. If you’re engaging in any kind of sexual activity whatsoever with another person, you are putting yourself at risk of getting STD’s.

That said, there are lots of ways you can safely and easily reduce your risk – and be fairly confident that you’re not going to contract an STD. First of all, being in a monogamous relationship with someone who has been tested for and is free from STD’s is a start. If you have multiple sexual partners, condoms are your best asset as far as safety during sex is concerned.

Yes, Oral Sex Can Transmit STD’s

Generally speaking, the risk for spreading sexually transmitted diseases through mouth to genital sex is much less than the risk of spreading them through anal sex or vaginal intercourse. However, there is still a risk there, because STD’s like AIDS and HIV are found in vaginal fluid, pre-cum and semen. Don’t assume that just because your partner doesn’t “ejaculate” in your mouth that you are safe from STD’s.

If you have a sore or cut on your mouth before giving someone cunnilingus or fellatio, your risk of getting an STD multiplies by quite a bit. Hepatitis C, HIV and AIDS are spread easily through blood contact, even semen or precum to blood – which is the case if you have a cut or sore on or around your mouth.

You may not even know you have a cut or sore in your mouth – many times, people have small lacerations on their gums from brushing their teeth and if your gums bleed when you brush your teeth, you can be pretty certain that you have an “open wound” in your mouth all the time, at least when it comes to talking about the transmission of STD’s.

Your Risk Of Contracting An STD During Oral Sex Varies

There’s no sure way of determining how high your risk of getting a sexually transmitted disease through fellatio or cunnilingus is, because it varies. For example, pre-cum has a lower concentration of virus than semen or blood does, and if a woman infected with the HIV, Hepatitis C or AIDS virus and is on her period, she is much more likely to transmit the disease to her partner during sex.

Because how high the risk is depends on so many different factors, there’s no way to accurately say that you’re going to be safe from getting an STD during fellatio or cunnilingus without a condom.

It’s Not Just AIDS Or HIV That Can Be Spread

While HIV and AIDS are probably the most worrisome of viruses that you can contract from mouth to genital sex, they’re not the only ones. There are lots of different sexually transmitted diseases and infections:

  • Chlamydia
  • Hepatitis C
  • Gonorrhea
  • Syphilis
  • Herpes
  • Pubic Lice
  • Genital Warts
  • HPV
  • Hepatitis B

That’s a pretty long list – and while some of these diseases can be treated with antibiotics, others can’t and some can even contribute to throat and mouth cancers later on in life. Furthermore, be aware of the fact that you may not know someone has an STD – in fact, they may not even know it. They may not be displaying any symptoms at all, so it’s best to be safe and assume that you have a risk of contracting any of these diseases through oral sex at any time.

Using A Condom Or A Dental Dam During Oral Sex Will Greatly Reduce Your Risk

If you want to reduce your risk of getting an STD during fellatio or cunnilingus, using a condom or a dental dam will make it much less likely that you would take anything home that you didn’t want to. Here are some tips on how to make yourself safer when giving (or receiving):

  • Wear a condom. Try flavored condoms or a flavored lube to make things taste better (and they smell great) and definitely avoid condoms that have spermicide on them.
  • For cunnilingus, make sure that you use a dental dam. If you place a dab of lube underneath the dental dam on the clitoris and vulva, it will create real feeling sensations that are just as good – if not better – than unprotected fellatio or cunnilingus.
  • Don’t use oil based lubricant at all. Oil based lubes will break down the latex and make the condom pretty much pointless.
  • Get a fresh condom after anal sex or vaginal sex if you’re going to have mouth to genital sex. You don’t want to be using the same condom for fellatio as you did for vaginal or anal sex. Not only does that make the condom less effective, it’s a great way to spread lots of harmful bacteria.
  • If you don’t have a dental dam on hand for cunnilingus, you can do one of two things. You can use a nice, large square of plastic food wrap, or you can cut a condom lengthwise and spread it out over the vulva. Either way is better and safer than using nothing at all.

How To Get Your Man In The Mood – TONIGHT!

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These sex tips to turn the heat up with your lover are almost GUARANTEED to work! Even though men are usually up for having sex, sometimes you need to put in a little effort to get your partner to start thinking about slipping in between the sheets with you. Apart from telling him up front that you want to get it on, try these super steamy sex tips tonight and have him begging for more!

Cook With Cloves

Cloves have long been known to be an aphrodisiac for both men and women, but they get a lot less press than other aphrodisiacs such as oysters or ginseng and ginkgo biloba. One woman who ate a clove soup with her man ended up having sex with her man all night – and it happened again the next time she made the soup! Cooking with cloves can definitely revv up your lover’s libido and have him craving sex – and it will work for you too! Next time you make dinner, find a recipe that has cloves in it, such as a ham baked with cloves or a clove flavored Bundt cake.

Be A “Damsel In Distress”

Men love to rescue women – it’s hard wired into their DNA to do it. Does this mean you have to completely give up your female independence to make him feel like the Alpha male though? Of course not. However, playing a “damsel in distress” every now in then will be all you need to get your partner wanting to lift your skirt up and bend you over.

Next time you want to get it on with your lover, have him come over and fix something for you or lift something really, really heavy that you just can’t manage to lift by yourself. Whatever you ask him to do, make sure it’s something really manly that you couldn’t possibly do on your own. Bonus points if he comes over to do his job and you’re wearing skimpy lingerie. He’ll definitely get the idea then!

Play A Little Hard To Get

Men also love the chase – it’s part of the reason they really don’t like clingy women. Men want to be with a woman who is confident enough not to NEED him too much or smother him with affection. Use this tactic to your advantage by playing a little hard to get. Flirting is probably the best way to do this. Flirt with your partner unabashedly – tease him, banter with him and let him get a glimpse of your ass in a tight pair of jeans as you walk away. It won’t be long before he’s tearing your jeans off and initiating a night full of passion.

Dress Up

You don’t necessarily have to dress up to get your partner to start thinking about sex, but take some time to make sure you look good. Often, women get comfortable in relationships and don’t do their makeup as often or worry about what their wearing. Usually, this isn’t a problem because men love to see their women in a pair of pajama pants that make your butt look good.

However, sometimes women get too comfortable and a guy’s “sex mechanism” doesn’t get turned on or want to have sex as much – because you’re not looking sexy, you’re not feeling sexy. And he can pick up on that. So go get a pedicure, a manicure, a wax job and buy a new bra and panty set. Do your hair and makeup, even if you’re just hanging out around the house. If you’re confident and looking hot, he’ll want to jump your bones ASAP.

Make Out

Another thing that couples forget about when they’ve been in a relationship for awhile is how much fun just kissing can be! Remember when you first got together with your current partner and you spent hours just kissing without worrying about when you were going to have sex or even what you were going to do next? There’s really something about making out with your partner – without thinking about sex – that makes sex even hotter when you finally do head to the bedroom!

Next time you and your lover are hanging out on the couch and watching a movie, lean over and start kissing his neck softly. Move up to his lips and kiss him deeply. If he starts to move his hands to start taking off your clothes, stop him. Use your lips to show him that you just want to kiss – for now. After you’ve teased him enough with your lips, then you can let him take it further.

The Virtuoso Lover Review

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The Virtuoso Lover, written by renowned love and romance author Michael Webb, is a complete, 3 book guide that will take you from being simply “okay” or “good” in bed to being absolutely excellent! Build your sex skills from square one or add finesse to your current sexual repertoire. An easy to read, comprehensive guide that will allow you to hone your sexual talents and truly become a master of sex.

The Good

The Virtuoso Lover is a complete guide on how to become a better lover. Not only does it include the philosophies behind great sex and how to become a great lover, it also includes two books on excellent tips and techniques to get you started. That said, Michael reminds us several times during the guide that actual tricks and techniques are not what make a great lover. Read all 3 books within the guide and you’ll be armed with comprehensive information on how to have amazing sex and become stunning in bed.

The Bad

Those looking for a simple guide full of techniques will easily be turned off by the lack of actual tricks in book one. The background information contained within book one is an extremely important step in learning how to become a great sex partner, but you may find yourself tempted to skip ahead a little bit to the actual how-to instructions. Resist the urge to read right past the chapters on sexual programming and common sex mistakes, because you’ll actually find that a lot of that information will completely change your outlook on sex, thereby completely revamping your sex life.

The Bottom Line

The Virtuoso Lover is a great all-in-one guide to becoming an awesome lover. This book certainly doesn’t disappoint, whether you’re looking to do a complete overhaul of your sex life or if you just want to pick up a few excellent tips here and there. The Virtuoso Lover is definitely one book you’ll want to save to reference back to again and again. As you move through your sexual journey, you’ll find more use for it than you ever had, especially as you get better and better at sex and need new and exciting things to try!

The Full Virtuoso Lover Review

Michael starts The Virtuoso Lover off with an introduction on how to get the most out of the information contained within. Many books containing great sex tips and advice fall short here, because a number of people just aren’t sure how to use the information they’re being given about sex. One of the most powerful pieces of advice in The Virtuoso Lover is this: “The biggest sex secrets are not moves, tricks or techniques – they are specific mindsets, beliefs and mental programming.” Your attitude towards sex has much more to do with how good you are in bed than you really think.

The guide dives right into the gritty stuff, introducing sexual programming and how each one of us has a different set of beliefs and ideas towards sex. Michael teaches us how to find our own custom sexual programming blueprint by asking ourselves sets of questions that has shaped us sexually. Michael shows us exactly why our brains – the most important sexual organ of the body – are pretty much completely in charge of our sexual experiences, right down to what we expect sexually of other people and how receptive we are to certain types of sexual gratification.

The Virtuoso Lover also gives some simple, yet powerful wisdom on the real secrets to enjoying sex. Being fully engaged in sex, focusing on your partner’s pleasure as well as your own and really knowing what you enjoy sexually are extremely effective at taking sex from “blah” to absolutely “wow!” Of course, one of the biggest problems sex-wise between men and women is just that – they’re very different! Men are completely different sexual creatures than women and they often don’t respond to the same things. Michael realizes that while the differences between men and women emotionally and socially may cause problems for a couple’s sex life, he also realizes (and teaches) that these differences can actually be made to work for you and not against you.

Foreplay is absolutely essential to a successful sexual relationship and that knowledge is not lost in The Virtuoso Lover. While the chapter on foreplay lacks some actual foreplay suggestions, the “why” behind it is a fascinating and enlightening read. You definitely won’t want to miss out on the benefits that foreplay – and lots of it – can offer you and your partner sexually.

Each person’s sexual journey is different, but Michael reminds us that one thing is pretty much the same between everyone: no one taught us how to have sex and they especially didn’t teach us how to have sex well. Many men and women turn to pornography to learn how to have sex, but this will only serve to make your sex life worse, not better. The Virtuoso Lover, however, points out the many sexual mistakes that men and women make, and how de-programming yourself to stop making these mistakes will greatly improve how good you are in the sack.

The second book in The Virtuoso Lover starts off with a bang and you right into step by step techniques on how to please your partner from head to toe. Michael warns against trying too hard and of going straight for the gold. In fact, many of the great techniques contained in the second part of The Virtuoso Lover don’t have anything to do with the vagina or clitoris at all. About halfway through, however, Michael announces the book’s foray into the pleasure to be had down south with a vibrant, “Welcome to the Vulva!” These are the tips that advanced lovers may want to skip ahead to.

Two quite large chapters on the clitoris and g-spot tell you how important these two spots are on a woman’s body, and after reading these sections, you won’t be wondering what to do with the clitoris or where exactly the g-spot is. Michael ties up the second installment of The Virtuoso Lover with a comprehensive look at a woman’s orgasm from how it happens to how it sometimes won’t happen and why.

The third and last book in The Virtuoso Lover guide is more about advanced techniques and philosophies that should definitely wait until you’ve mastered many of the principles in the first two books of the guide. From sex positions to dirty talk, Michael finishes up the mini-series with just about everything else you need to know about how to become great at sex, whether you’re new at it or have been doing it for years.

The Virtuoso Lover is definitely a long read, so it’s not one you’ll want to sit down with and try to read “cover to cover.” Instead, take some time out to read and absorb a few of the principles in the guide, putting them into play soon after learning them. You can always go back to the guide and grab a few more pieces of the puzzle and start adding them to your sexual repertoire until you’ve literally become a sex master.

Of course, what ebook wouldn’t be complete without some amazing bonus materials? Michael certainly doesn’t let us down here, and has given us five incredible bonus books to only further add to your knowledge about how to fully and completely pleasure your partner.

Sex All Around The House

One way that sex gets old fast is doing it in the bed over and over and over. So you don’t have a ton of money to spend in a hotel room or anything, but you don’t have to! This lovely little companion book tells you hundreds of different ways you can turn your house into a sex playroom! You may have thought of doing it on the couch a few times, but Sex All Around The House definitely takes it to the next level.

How To Make It Bigger, Stronger And Last Longer

No matter how many sex skills and techniques you learn, it won’t help you a whole lot if you haven’t got much stamina to keep going with. If you have a short or thin penis or are a premature ejaculator, Michael includes a book that will help give you the skills you need to take control over your sex life with 100% all natural ways to enlarge and thicken the penis, as well as helping you to last longer in the sack.

Sexy Coupons

You’ve probably heard of giving your partner sexy coupons for an anniversary or Valentine’s Day gift, but what about just giving coupons to your partner just because? Included with all the other great bonus items you get with The Virtuoso Lover, you’ll get a booklet of coupons you can leave under your partner’s pillow or in their car to get them thinking about what you want to do to them all day.

How To Give Your Partner Great Massages

Massages are a great way to get your partner to loosen up and relax before sex. One of Michael’s most important tips to giving your partner the greatest pleasure (and getting the best pleasure in return) is to help your partner to relax and put the day’s stress behind them. This companion book will teach you massage basics so you can melt her muscles and make her putty in your hands.

101 Romantic Ideas

Romance is many times the only prelude to sex, so if you don’t know how to romance a woman, you’re not getting very far with her in bed no matter how many awesome techniques you know. Go from being good in the sack to being an amazing lover in every sense of the word. Romance her and sweep her off her feet and make the sex that much better! 101 Romantic Ideas will definitely take you to the next level.

Faster Female Orgasm Review

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Faster Female Orgasm is an excellent guide that teaches women how to take CONTROL of their own orgasm! Learn how to have a faster and harder O today! A step by step guide on how you can reach orgasm every time. This book will do more than teach you the proper way to masturbate alone and during sex. It will teach you how to achieve your objective of experiencing simultaneous orgasm that you may have heard of but never tried.

The Good

For women that want to take control of their own orgasms instead of leaving it up to the guy every time, Faster Female Orgasm is the perfect guide to teach you how to reach the big “O” faster, harder and more than once! You can forget ever having to fake an orgasm again, because with your help, your man’s best efforts will be rewarded and so will you. Written in an easy to read, conversational tone, Faster Female Orgasm reaches out to both women who have never had an orgasm before and those who just want to make their orgasms better!

The Bad

The section on female anatomy is quite detailed and a great way to learn all about a woman’s genitals, but it seems a bit out of place in a book written for women who probably know what’s going on down there from years of masturbation. However, if you want to learn the scientific names for all the parts of a woman’s anatomy, or you’ve never taken a peek downstairs yourself, this section is handy.

The Bottom Line

Faster Female Orgasm, written by female orgasm guru Jessica Perez, is a comprehensive guide that teaches women how they can be responsible for their own pleasure, even with the guys that have failed to give them orgasms for several years. Jessica’s book is about a woman taking control over her own orgasms instead of just letting their guys do it, because Jessica illustrates a very important but little talked about fact here – many women fake it because their men are trying so hard but just can’t seem to push them past the finish line. Faster Female Orgasm will teach you how to pick up the baton and run with it, bringing yourself to the finish line with your man right by your side! A great companion manual to Faster Female Orgasm is The Female Orgasm Black Book written by Lee Jenkins.

The Full Faster Female Orgasm Review

Jessica begins Faster Female Orgasm with several stories of women who just can’t seem to have a climax by having sex with their partners, even though they can easily reach orgasm through masturbation in five minutes or less. Sound familiar? Jessica reaches out to women who want to share their orgasms with their partners through sex, but haven’t been able to achieve it so far.

A section on clitoral stimulation starts the meat of the book off right, as clitoral stimulation is the easiest and fastest way for most women to reach climax. Here Jessica teaches techniques that can be used both during masturbation and penetrative sex. Jessica also highlights how to achieve a g-spot orgasm, as well as how to masturbate properly. Perhaps the most powerful lesson in this section is how to simulate sex during masturbation, thereby training yourself to be able to climax during sex as easily and quickly as you climax during masturbation.

A big problem that women have when they’re about to reach climax is their bodies tense up and they’re not sure how to “ride the wave.” Jessica teaches women how to relax and let the climax come so to speak, rather than inadvertently fighting it. Later on, Jessica discusses the most powerful orgasm a woman can have during penetration, called the “entry orgasm.” Many women have read about it but few actually get to achieve it, where the woman is able to have a climax the minute her partner penetrates her. Jessica shows women step by step exactly how to have this type of climax, and shows you how you can have it every single time!

Faster Female Orgasm wouldn’t be complete without a section on the best sex positions for female orgasms, and the book certainly does not disappoint. Several sex positions are listed here, from the best positions that allow for clitoral stimulation to those that are better for the “entry orgasm” or any other type of deep, penetrative g-spot orgasm.

Jessica recognizes the fact that all women fantasize, and that these fantasies can actually play an important role in a woman’s ability to have a climax during sex. In this section, you will learn how to fantasize the right way, allowing your mind to take you to places you’ve never been before! The mind and body connection is a powerful thing for all women, and most women don’t even use this to their advantage during sex!

Faster Female Orgasm ends with a great section on how to teach your partner to do the things you’ve just learned to do during masturbation, to max out your pleasure during sex. While most men try extremely hard to give a woman a climax, few of them actually succeed. Jessica shows you how to train your man to give you orgasms in addition to controlling your own orgasms. A great partner book here would be The Female Orgasm Black Book by Lee Jenkins, which illustrates in detail exactly how a man can please a woman and give her mind blowing orgasms.

Included with the download of Faster Female Orgasm are several great manuals, including another fullebook for free!

Blow His Mind Tonight

Jessica’s full ebook on how to amaze your guy in the bedroom is included, and boy will it ever come in handy! This great manual will teach you how to give your guy the best climax he’s ever had through oral sex or manual stimulation, making him even more willing to give you a great climax in return! Read our full review of Blow His Mind Tonight here.

Top 25 Female Orgasm Tips For Men

This guide will teach your man how to find your g-spot, how to hit the g-spot during sex and also how to use his fingers to bring you to “multiple escalating orgasms!” And you thought fingering was old news!

Top 10 Accelerated Orgasm Methods

Once you’ve mastered the techniques in the Faster Female Orgasm book, you’ll be ready for the next step. This free manual teaches you advanced techniques that will really make your toes curl.

 

How To Give Your Sex Life A Makeover Without Shattering Your Man’s Ego

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Sex isn’t something every guy is a natural at. In fact, a lot of guys are very awkward when it comes to pleasing a woman and some guys aren’t able to give their partners an orgasm at all, period. If your man sucks in the sack, you definitely want to give him a few sex tips to point him in the right direction – but how on earth do you do it without damaging your guy’s fragile ego? Here’s how to gently give your guy sex tips, while still making him think he’s the best.

Vocalize Your Pleasure

Even if he doesn’t get it right most of the time, there’s bound to be a few times that he hits the spot exactly the way you want it – and when he does, it’s important that you vocalize your pleasure and make a very big deal about it. You don’t necessarily have to make it into dirty talk – you can simply moan very loudly, gasp for air or yell “Yes!” – or all of the above. The point is, you want to make sure that he KNOWS that he’s done something right. Because once he figures out that he’s on the right track, he’s going to keep doing whatever it is that makes you scream and writhe with pleasure. So vocalizing what feels great to you is beneficial for you both.

Do To Him What You Want Him To Do To You

Sometimes, the best way to give your lover sex tips is to actually show him what you like – on him. If you want him to give you oral sex, try giving him a really great blowjob first. If you want him to touch you with his hands or finger you, show him what you want by giving him a handjob first! The idea here is to show him what you like by doing it to him first. He’ll probably pick up on it right away, but he may not. Keep giving him what you want and he’ll eventually get the idea. If he doesn’t, you can always wait until after you’ve given him a really amazing oral sex session and say, “I would love for you to try that on me.”

Guide His Hands – Or Mouth

If he’s going down on you and just isn’t hitting the right spot, don’t be afraid to gently guide him in the right direction. If he’s licking in the wrong place, gently use your hands to guide his head and mouth to just the right spot. Honestly, he’ll appreciate the pointers much more than he would appreciate his efforts being wasted because he wasn’t sure what you wanted – and you wouldn’t tell him.

If he’s using his hands, gently slide your hand down to your clitoris and show him with your hand how you want to be touched. This won’t upset him if you’re not cocky or condescending about it. You can also move his hand the way you want him to touch you – and after you let go, he’ll continue doing the same movements you showed him.

Leave A Magazine Or Internet Article Out For Him To See

If you find a particular juicy article with sex tips you think your man can use, leave it out inconspicuously for him to find. If it’s a print publication, leave the magazine in the bathroom, open to the page you want him to read. Leave it out as though you were simply reading it yourself and just forgot to put the magazine up. Next time he’s sitting in the bathroom, he’ll probably notice it – and read it. If it’s an Internet article, just leave your browser pulled up like you had forgotten to close it down. You can also minimize the browser and when he pulls up the Internet, the article will pop up “accidentally.” This is especially effective if you and your partner share a computer.

Tell Him – Nicely

If all else fails, you need to talk with your guy about how to make your sex life better – because if he’s getting off, you deserve to have an orgasm too (and an amazing one at that!) There’s absolutely no shame in talking to your guy about how to make sex better, but the way you bring it up is extremely important. If you start the conversation off saying “You need to do this,” or “You do this wrong,” it’s going to make him want to immediately stop listening to you. Don’t criticize your guy – because he’s probably trying very hard to please you sexually. Instead, tell him things you’d love to try, or say, “I love it when you do this, but I think this would be even better.”