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Top 5 Reasons You Can’t Get It Up

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Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a term to describe a state of impotency.

Yikes.

But ED is actually very common, and often only temporary. Most guys out there will be able to remember one drunken night that they couldn’t quite make it happen. In fact anything from one too many hamburgers, to ill health, to how stressed you’re feeling about your job can have an effect on your ability to get it up.

Here are some of the most common reasons why ED may happen to you:

1. Reduced Blood Flow To The Penis

Hands down the most common cause of ED in over 40s is that not enough blood is flowing to your penis to make it hard. This is caused by a narrowing of the arteries which is a natural part of getting older. However, you may want to eliminate the environmental factors that can make it worse.

2. Smoking And Poor Diet

Yep these are the two things you think of straight away as a cause of bad health and poor circulation. Smoking and high cholesterol foods (that would be your favourite pizza) constrict and clog the arteries respectively. The result? Crappy erections. The penis is no different to any other area of your body. For your penis to be fit, you have to be fit too.

3. Lack Of Exercise

Remember sex is a cardiovascular activity, which puts it in the same bracket as running! So if you think you’d collapse after two minutes on the treadmill, the chances of you getting a high quality erection are slim. The more physically fit you are, the more efficiently your heart pumps blood, the stronger your erections will be.

There are other physical causes of ED: like Multiple Sclerosis, cycling, and a lack of testosterone.

This is rarer though than psychological factors like stress: which are in fact the most common cause of ED.

4. Stress

Yep that same feeling of ‘headache’ caused by your boss setting you an unreasonable deadline, or worrying about your parents’ ill health, can be the same psychological burden that stops you from performing. ED that sets on suddenly is usually due to stress. So if you’re having a tough time personally, as well as professionally; often fixing what’s going on in the work place will help fix what’s not happening in the bedroom.

5. Anxiety

Erectile dysfunction pretty much sums up the saying ‘negative cycle.’ If you have ED once then it can quickly become a repeat offender: because not having the erections you want is stressful. Best way forward is to take the pressure off. Enjoy non-penetrative activities with your partner, don’t focus on your erection and you can break the cycle.

So while the bad news is that ED is pretty common, particularly as you age; it is also often temporary. Making sure you have good health, a happy head and positive relationships will do a lot to counterbalance the most common causes of ED.

11 Blowjob Places That Will TOTALLY Surprise Your Man!

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A blowjob is fun, but it can be extra sexy when you do it OUT of the bedroom. Surprise your fella with a blowjob in one of these incredible new places!

Okay, so you can only go so far with actual blowjob tricks, tips and techniques. What do you do when you’ve exhausted your entire bag of tricks? Well, there’s always the element of the surprise fellatio session! Guys love to get fellatio when they’re least expecting it – it makes it seem like fellatio is entirely new to them! Take your partner by surprise in the kitchen for a few minutes while fixing dinner or even at his desk while he is on the computer. A surprise fellatio session during your favorite movie can rev him up and you can even take him to the bedroom for a more intimate experience. The possibilities with surprise fellatio are endless!

1. In The Car

This is commonly known as “road head.” Make sure your partner is on a slow, deserted street (highways later in the evening or at night are great because they’re so empty) and go to! Make sure, however, that your partner will let you know if it gets to be too much for him and he can pull over. You DON’T want him to have an orgasm while driving! Pull over and finish the job.

2. In The Shower

This may seem a little bland, but guys love fellatio in the shower. A lot of women do too because if her partner has an orgasm, she can easily spit out the semen and rinse her mouth without a lot of extra fuss.

3. In A Pool, Jacuzzi, Etc.

Make sure these are private (or semi-private) before you start! Your partner will love feeling the kinkiness of receiving fellatio while in a pool or Jacuzzi. Have him sit on the steps of the pool or on the ladder so that you have something to hold onto while you do your magic. If you’re good at holding your breath, disappear below the surface and you’ll fulfill his mermaid sex fantasy!

4. In A Lake Or Ocean

You can quickly separate yourself from the rest of the pack in such a large body of water. A float is a great tool for putting your man on and then as your lower body is still in the water, you have full access to him.

5. On A Bus Or Plane

This is a great one if you can manage it! If you can do this discreetly, you and your partner can have a great time giving and receiving fellatio on a bus or a plane. An airplane blowjob during a night flight can be accomplished without much notice from passengers around you since they tend to be less crowded. Move to the back of the plane and ask for a few of those complimentary blankets. Once the lights are dim and fellow passengers nod off, it’s time to wake your man up! Having him ejaculate in your mouth and trying to be quiet while doing it is an awesome experience.

6. In A Public Restroom

This is a great one, because in a lot of restrooms (such as a family restroom) can be shut and locked with just you and your partner inside. If people come knocking on the door asking to use the restroom, however, it is best if you pack up and try another bathroom. And never in a port-a-potty. Duh.

7. In The Backyard

Or the front yard if you have a fairly private place. Or in a field or open area – the feeling of a cool breeze and the grass on your partner’s naked body will thrill his senses! At night, take a blanket or quilt outside and enjoy the moon and stars together. Take two blankets if you think there is a chance of being spotted. Lie on the one and slip below the top cover!

8. In Mother Nature

Take a hike in the woods! If you’re on a highly traveled set of hiking trails, just find a spot not too far from the trail and rest his back up against a tree. Just watch for poison ivy!

Find a bridge out on a ride through the country and climb under it. Once you start looking around, with the thoughts of a “fun” blowjob in mind, you’ll definitely see spots popping up everywhere!

9. At A Sports Event

Remember stories about making out under the bleachers in high school? Take that to the next level with your partner and give him awesome fellatio in a private place at a sports event. Just make sure it’s a private place! If you’re nervous about the chances of getting caught, consider this: my readers have returned to sports complexes after hours and ‘done the deed’ in the dug outs at baseball fields on the players’ benches and also on the 50 yard line of the youth football field. They’ve even gone to a kid’s playground after midnight and used the end of on the old fashioned slides! Of course, I am not advocating anything that might be illegal.

10. In The Laundromat

This may be a little risky but if you and your partner are up for a little bit of fun, you can have your partner sit up on a washer or dryer (providing that you’re alone in the laundry mat) and go to town! This is even better if the washer or dryer is operating! Keep in mind, small town laundry mats are better than conglomerate laundry mats for this task. Turn his back to the door so that it’s not obvious to anyone walking by.

11. In A Car Wash

Pull into one of those drive-in car washes on the pretense that your car needs a quick cleaning. Go for the “deluxe” package so you’ll have plenty of time. Use the secluded, suds filled location inside your vehicle to go down on him!

How To Give An Amazing Leg Massage

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Erotic massage can really make a difference when it comes to sex and foreplay for a woman. Use these leg & thigh techniques to make your girl melt!

Let’s get to the sexiest and most sexually arousing area of your lover’s body—her legs and thighs. After you’ve thoroughly primed her libido with lots of kissing and erotic massage, it’s time to go for the gold. But before you do, start out with a sweet long stroke completely around her body.

The Long Stroke

Placing both of your hands onto one of her legs (either one will do), begin moving them up her leg to the side of her body and continue up over her arm, up to her shoulder, and then up to the top of her head. Repeat the same movement down the opposite side of her body all the way down to her feet. Lightly touching and grazing sensitive and sexually arousing areas of her skin are highly encouraged with this move, and you should feel free enough at this point to tease her most private areas.

Once you’ve finished moving your hands up her body in one long stroke, you’ll want to move them back down to her legs, where you will begin your ultimate magic.

Massaging The Legs

Starting with one leg at a time, with palms facing down, place both of your hands on top of that leg just above her ankle. Now, using long slow strokes, massage up and down lightly the length of her leg. As you begin moving down from the top of either leg, let your hand drift and glide smoothly into the sensitive area of her inner thigh, then move down to her knee, over her shins, and all the way down to her foot. Repeat this move a few times over each leg and every time you do, come a bit closer to her vagina as you dip down into her thighs. You can even begin to ever so lightly graze her labia with the tips of your thumbs or fingertips to help prepare her for the erotic phase of the massage.

If she lets you go this far and is loving it, it’s time to crank up the heat. So the next technique is to lift up one of her legs by bending it at the knee. Next, place her foot flat down on the surface she is lying on.

Moving On To The Inner Thighs

By lifting her leg, it will create even more access to her inner thigh and other sensitive areas on the backside of her leg. This will allow you to massage deeper, further, and get closer to her most sensitive and intimate areas of arousal. A great location you can now easily stroke is the backside of her upper leg – this area is especially arousing in this position as you can massage all the way from the backside of her knee all the way down to her buttocks.

In this position, begin by rubbing her calf muscles gently with both of your hands in an up-and-down motion. Do this a few times and then move your hands over the top of her upper leg and then down towards her hip. As you come back up, with your hands now placed on either side of her upper leg, delicately stroke her inner thigh. Repeat this move several times.

Grazing Sensitive, Nerve-Packed Areas

Next, with a downward stroke, move your hand completely underneath the backside of her leg and stroke down towards her butt and even go underneath it a bit. On the way back up, stop at the skin behind the backside of her knee, and lightly stroke around there with your fingertips. The sensations of this combination will surely ignite her fire of sexual desire.

Another effective move for increasing her desire for sex is to place both of your hands on the sides of one of her legs, just above the top of her knee (while it is still in the bent position). Next, make slow circular motions while you run your hands down her thigh. As your movements get closer to her vagina, let the fingertips of your hand on the inner side of thigh lightly graze the outer lips of her vagina. Do this a few times up and down on each thigh area of both her legs. It will drive her absolutely crazy with desire!

By the time you get to this point of your massage, your lover should be very ripe when it comes to her level or sexual arousal and desire for sex!

Do Aphrodisiacs Really Work?

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Aphrodisiac products have quite the reputation – for both working and not working. Many people swear by them to get their libido going, while others have tried hundreds that haven’t worked for them. So what’s the real deal about aphrodisiac stuff? Is it worth it?

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What Is An Aphrodisiac?

Aphrodisiacs are foods, scents or herbs that claim to have the ability to make a man or woman more aroused. The idea behind this is that someone can eat, smell or consume certain things and their sex drive will increase – as in, they’ll suddenly start thinking about sex and nothing but sex. Many aphrodisiacs claim not only to boost sex drive, but also to make it feel better and produce faster, harder and more pleasurable orgasms.

Some foods that can be considered aphrodisiacs are avocados and oysters, while the smell of pumpkin pie or lavender is said to be a huge aphrodisiac for men. Yohimbe bark and horny goat weed are some of the popular aphrodisiac herbs and are found in many sexual supplements.

The Placebo Effect

This is where things get really hairy, because it’s actually impossible to tell if many aphrodisiacs really work or if what is really happening is the placebo effect.

What Is The Placebo Effect?

Studies have shown that in some cases, a placebo medication will work just as well as the actual medication. What happens here is if the person is convinced they’re taking something that will be effective, it will be, simply because the brain is a powerful enough tool that it can control the body.

So basically, the placebo effect plays a significant role in assessing whether aphrodisiacs are effective or not, because if someone really believes that aphrodisiacs work, they’ll most likely get positive results whether the actual product did the trick or the person’s mind did.

Is An Aphrodisiac Really Effective?

The answer to this question is a big, resounding “Maybe!” It’s impossible to tell which aphrodisiacs are truly effective on the body and which ones aren’t due to the placebo effect. Some aphrodisiacs will increase blood flow (which in turn, increases blood flow to the vagina or penis), so people who use them may notice real, tangible effects on their bodies.

The most fun thing about trying different aphrodisiacs is trying them! Experimenting with different foods, scents and herbs that have the potential to light your sex life on fire is fun in and of itself and may just spice up your sexy time without the help of the actual products. When you play with aphrodisiacs, you’re likely going to find some that are effective and some that aren’t – and that’s the way it goes.

How To Try Them

If you really want to start “testing” out aphrodisiacs, you’ll want to follow a few simple suggestions.

  • Don’t try more than one at a time. If you’re testing them and one or more of them work, you won’t be able to isolate which one it was.
  • Consider keeping notes about which ones are effective and which ones are not. If you’ve only tried a few of them, it may be easy enough to remember that avocados don’t do much for you but the scent of lavender really does. If you’re trying a bunch, keeping notes can help you remember which ones to try next and which ones to avoid.
  • Keep track of which aphrodisiacs are for men and which are for women. For example, lavender and pumpkin pie smells don’t do much for the ladies, but are said to really rev a guy’s libido up. If you’re using something that is “aimed” towards women and you’re a guy, it’s probably not going to be very effective unless the placebo effect is super powerful.
  • Be VERY aware of what you’re consuming. Do not consume products that have not been verified as safe, and if you have any health issues such as heart problems, diabetes or other issues, discuss with your doctor what is okay for you to take and what isn’t.

Does It Really Matter, Anyways?

Think about it this way – does it really matter if an aphrodisiac works because it actually is effective or whether it was the placebo effect? Because at the end of the day, you’re turned on, whether it was the product or your brain that did it.

So make a point to have fun with aphrodisiacs and don’t stress too much about whether they work or not. Focus on relaxing, having a good time and don’t put too much pressure on yourself or your partner to perform – because that will backfire and you will likely not be having sex at all that night.

Ladies – What To Do With Your Pubic Hair Before Oral Sex

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Oral sex is super pleasurable – but not if your man is wading through a forest to get there. Take care of your pubes first with these simple suggestions.

You no doubt know that showering is an important part of cunnilingus. It does two things – it makes you feel fresher and more comfortable with your body and it helps a man to enjoy your light, natural scent without feeling overpowered. Some couples more comfortable with each other may elect not to shower directly beforehand while others may consider it a rigorous part of the routine. Whichever you and your partner decide on is up to you – just make sure it is something that will make you both interested in and receptive to cunnilingus.

Discussing Pubic Hair Before Oral Sex

An overgrown forest is probably not the best venue for a cunnilingus session. Not to say that the vulva has to be completely bare either. This is another aspect of cunnilingus that must be discussed with your partner beforehand if you’re both going to enjoy it. If you feel that being too bare and exposed with very little or no pubic hair on your vulva is uncomfortable, you will not be receptive to cunnilingus and may be too preoccupied worrying about your lack of hair to enjoy it.

Similarly, a man that is choking on massive amounts of pubic hair will not find cunnilingus enjoyable either. One thing that is important to note here is that an overgrowth of pubic hair will actually impede a woman’s ability to feel a warm, wet tongue on her vulva to the fullest extent. A good trim (or shave if you desire) is an excellent way to open up your vulva so that you can experience more of your partner’s efforts during cunnilingus.

Trimming Instead Of Shaving

If you are apprehensive about shaving your pubic hair, you can certainly try trimming it closely to the skin. Surprisingly, a good tool to use for this job is a man’s electric shaver. You can experiment with different lengths to find which one suits you best. You may find that pubic hair closely shorn to the skin is more comfortable and may give you a light, airy and clean feeling.

Something for you to remember – many women shave their pubic hair for the same reason they shave their armpits. Sweat sticks to thick, long hair and will begin to collect bacteria. Unfortunately, when this happens, a pungent and sometimes unpleasant odor will arise. For many women, keeping their pubic hair under control has become part of the daily beauty routine, as with the underarms.

Shaving Instead Of Trimming

For those who would like to shave, there are many options.  You can shave all your pubic hair off, or you can leave a small patch (sometimes called a “landing strip”) on the mons pubis. Shaving can sometimes be uncomfortable when it grows back, just like with shaving any other part of the body. Shaving bumps can occur and it can be itchy when growing back. Shaving, if done properly, however, can become a simple job. Here are some great tips if you choose to shave:

  • Soak in a warm bath for a few minutes before shaving to soften the hairs.
  • Conditioner can also be used on the hair to soften it – leave it on for several minutes.
  • Trim any long hair with scissors (or an electric shaver) before starting
  • Use disposable safety razors – never use a straight blade!
  • Use your hands to manipulate skin to stretch it out before shaving it (this will also keep important parts like the clitoris or your labia out of the way)
  • Use hypoallergenic, unscented soaps, shaving creams and lotions. It will cut down on irritation later.
  • Don’t use powder unless it’s cornstarch – studies show that talc leads to cervical cancer.
  • Use a mirror – a hand mirror works well. It’s easier if you can see what you’re doing!
  • Over-the-counter cortisone cream can help razor burn should it arise.