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You are here: Home / Archives for Relationship Advice

How To Make Everyday Activities SEXY!

By loveandsex

Flirting isn’t just for dates – you can flirt anytime, anywhere! Here’s how to use flirting to up the ante when doing normal, every day things! You may not realize it, but there are numerous opportunities throughout your day to work in some valuable, sexy couple time. It might not feel like it, of course, between all those hours spent at work, doing chores around the house, and trying to stay healthy with regular exercise. However, if you’re willing to take a second look at the things you do every day, you will soon see that many of them can involve your partner in new, fun ways.

Flirting When Exercising Together

Your workout is a great place to start. What do you and/or your significant other typically do for exercise? Is it something that you can start doing together, like running, biking or hiking? Having your S.O. there with you won’t just add to the time you spend together each day, but it will also give you both an extra incentive to stay on top of your workouts. You may even find that having a little friendly competition will push you to run faster, bike for longer, etc.

Best of all, exercise boosts your endorphins and your overall mood, along with your sex drive. If you’re both getting fit together, you just might find you’re in the mood for sex more often than before. You can even spice things up by making little bets here or there—i.e. whoever finishes your running route the fastest gets to pick the position you use in bed that night.

In addition to blending your preexisting workouts together, you might also want to look into new forms of exercise. You could both sign up for a team sport together, or start playing one-on-one basketball or tennis with each other. Better still, try taking a Latin dance class together. You’ll be surprised at how much of a workout you both get, and all that close contact is bound to put you in the mood for sex.

Flirting While Doing Chores Together

Working out together is hardly the only way to build more couple-time into your days. You can take some of your least-loved things, like chores, and use them as an excuse to get closer with your sweetheart. Turn chores into games. Divide up the house cleaning, and whoever completes their chores first each day gets to choose a sexy activity to participate in that night. Wash the dishes together, and each time the person washing or drying falls behind the other person, they have to take off one item of clothing.

Though you might be tempted to take a little extra time doing the dishes—all in the sake of stripping down to your undies—you’ll surely end up enjoying it. You can even do the whole French Maid costume thing while actually cleaning your bedroom, although you might not get very far if your partner can’t handle the wait. In general, though, one of the best things about doing all of your chores together is that the work will be evenly divided up, and you’ll ultimately end up with more downtime to spend together.

Flirting While Cooking Together

Perhaps one of the most fun everyday things you can enjoy with your partner is cooking. When you’ve both gotten home from work, instead of flipping on the TV and waiting for takeout to arrive, try making dinner together. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. It just needs to be something that you can both cook together. Take turns being the head cook and the assistant cook so no one ever feels like they’re secondary. Food is highly sensual.

It’s said that, outside of actually having sex, feeding someone you’re attracted to is one of the most sexual things out there. So don’t be afraid to taste test with each other as you go. Licking a little of that sauce off your partner’s finger certainly can’t hurt. You’re not at a restaurant, either, so you can feel free to cook in an apron and nothing else if you’d like. Just don’t set the kitchen on fire if you get too distracted with each other.

Whether you’re racing each other down the block or playing naughty chefs, the key to spicing up everyday life is simple. Involve your partner in your routine and try to put a positive, sexy spin on otherwise mundane things. The more often you do it, the more natural it will seem to find joy in everything simply by being together.

Filed Under: Flirting Tips Tagged With: flirting, Relationship Advice, seduction, sex tips

4 Ways To Be An Amazing Boyfriend

By loveandsex

A relationship requires effort from both partners. She’s putting it in, but are you? Are you really such a great boyfriend, or is she just hanging on to you until someone else comes along? Here are four ways you can make your relationship incredible, so your girl will want to be with YOU and only you.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-AScZyAfAE&feature=relmfu[/youtube]

Don’t Be A Boring Boyfriend

Girls want a guy who knows how to have fun. Don’t be boring – strive to plan fun, exciting things for you and your girl to go out and do. Don’t just sit at home on the couch eating take-out and watching movies or playing video games. While staying in and eating bad Chinese food in front of a DVD marathon is really fun every once in awhile, it’s not something she wants to do all the time.

Plan ways you can show her a great time, whether it’s taking her out to a new restaurant or club you’ve never been to before, or doing something really adventurous like rock climbing or horseback riding. Making her feel great by getting out and doing things (and showing her that you’re interested in doing things with her) is one of the best ways to prove that you’re a great partner – and not boring at all. Also, learn how to carry on a great conversation and engage your partner mentally. Women are so emotion and mind oriented that if you learn how to give her mental and emotional stimulation often, she will really love spending time with you no matter what you’re doing.

Be Someone That She Can Be Proud Of

Yes, there are many girls that will fall for a bum. But most of them won’t. If they do, you can pretty much bet that before long, she’s going to get tired of you and move on to someone else. Instead of letting that happen, be someone she can really be proud of. Be someone that she can tell her friends and family about. Be a motivated, confident, ambitious and energetic guy!

Have a job or other things going on in your life that she can tell other people about, such as a killer position at a popular company in your city, or volunteering as a firefighter for the local fire department. No matter what you choose to do, make sure you’re actually doing something and not nothing, and that it’s something your girl can brag a little about!

You also want to have things of your own that you’re doing that don’t always involve her. Have fun with your guy friends! Don’t be too clingy or suffocating, because if you are, your relationship won’t last long. Have things that you love and are passionate about in your life that don’t necessarily have anything to do with your girlfriend at all. Encourage her to go out and spend time with her girl friends and you do the same!

Value Your Time Together

Too many guys out there take their partners for granted when they’re in a relationship. They may rush through the dating process to have sex, or they may just get so comfortable with their partner that they take for granted any time spent with them. Don’t be that guy! Make sure that you take the dating process step by step, and enjoy each different phase of your relationship. When you’re on a date with your partner, make sure that you are fully present and that you’re engaging your partner in conversation. You want to be paying attention to her, not the game on the TV behind the bar or the cute waitress.

Also, show your partner that you really value her by making her feel sexy. Compliment the outfit she’s wearing and tell her that she’s beautiful. Take her on dates that allow her to dress up and do her hair, so she feels sexy and beautiful when she’s around you. If you’re always hanging around the house and she never gets the chance to get out of her sweatpants or put her makeup on, she’s not going to feel good about herself at all. When you touch her, tell her how soft her skin is or how nice her curves are against you. Make her feel like a million bucks!

Develop A Close Connection With Her

Don’t wall yourself off from your partner emotionally. Women speak the language of emotion, so if you’re a robot with her, she’s not going to be interested in you for long. Let your guard down some and make yourself a little vulnerable to her. Share how you’re feeling about her and about other things, and respond to the things she’s feeling when she tells you about them.

Work on developing a close connection with your partner and when you do achieve that level of emotional intimacy in your relationship, everything is going to be better. Sex is better when you’re really close with someone, and life is better in general when you have someone you can share those intimate details with.

Filed Under: Relationship Advice Tagged With: committment, confidence, dating, love, Relationship Advice

Is He Ready For A Serious Relationship?

By dicksinthecity

Dating is fun, but sometimes you want to move on to something more committed. How can you tell if your partner is ready to move past the dating phase?

I’m dating this amazing guy. But I’m the first girl he’s dated seriously since his last serious relationship ended. I want a future with him, and I’m ready to open myself up and give my heart to him, but I want to be sure. How do I know I’m not his rebound girl?

What She Said:

Beware of “Ghost Sex!” He may like you; or he could mentally be placing his ex-girlfriend’s face on your body and going to town. Sorry to sound so crass – but the old adage, “The best way to get over someone is get under someone” is often true. I’m sure he enjoys your company; but the fact is, depending on how recent the breakup, your presence might just be keeping him warm until his heart has healed.

Are You A Rebound?

How to spot a rebound? Be honest with yourself. Does he talk about her a lot? Are there still pictures everywhere? Does he seem angry or flinch if her name is brought up? If so, chances are his mind is still on the relationship and not in the present with you. If it was a long-term relationship, his penis will most likely be ready to move on before his heart. If you’re looking for sex and nothing more, this can be a fun time for both of you. If you’re hooked on this guy, stay away until he’s had time to sort things out.

Honestly, if I’m into a guy, my rule of thumb is to not be the first girl he’s with after a serious relationship. I find that you’re usually dealing with the fallout of the past and not the good stuff. Even guys need time to work through their feelings – whether they show it or not. It’d be great to move on as if nothing ever happened – but the hurt is there somewhere, and it will find a way to come out.

Getting His Mind On YOU

You’re worth 100% of his attention. Again, if you’re looking for a fling, this is a fine time to get some no strings attached lovin’. But, given that you’re bummed out, I’d cool it with this guy. Chances are if you set your boundaries and treat yourself with respect, it’ll be you and not his ex he’s thinking about in no time.

What He Said:

I feel really old, because I thought “Ghost Sex” involved Whoopi Goldberg, Demi Moore, and Patrick Swayze. Nevertheless, I am undaunted and proudly declare “Ghost Sex” to be my new favorite word and hereby dedicate the remainder of my existence to the gratuitous use of the term until it gets old for me (hint: it won’t. I’m like a five year old.)

Here’s a thought: if you haven’t met his friends, or if he doesn’t spend money on you or if you only meet in the backseat of his car, then well, you’re just for fun. You really need to figure out how long it’s been since the end of his last serious relationship and how serious was it (marriage, living together, etc) and how messy or amicable was the break up.

Trust Your Gut Feelings

Recovery time is a tricky thing. Everyone heals from injury at different speeds, so he may be ready for another relationship right away. Or maybe not. And he may not know where he’s at in that process. So go with your gut if it feels right, then it is. If it doesn’t, well…it’s time to cut the cord.

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: commitment, Dating Tips, love, Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice: My Partner Isn’t Who I Thought They Were!

By loveandsex

A relationship is built on trust – what do you do when your significant other isn’t who you thought they were in the beginning? Can you save the relationship?

It can feel like total betrayal when you discover that your mate isn’t exactly who you thought they were. Maybe you’re horrified to discover that they’ve had a completely different romantic past than you thought. Maybe you’re just shocked to discover their religious or political beliefs aren’t what you thought they’d be. Regardless, you need to talk things through, unearth other possible secrets, and decide whether or not this is still the right person for you.

When They’re Not Who You Think

Few things are as jarring as discovering that your partner isn’t who you thought him or her to be. Sometimes it’s our own fault, of course. You immediately jump to great conclusions about someone because you want them to be golden thanks to how attracted you feel toward them. Then you get to know them a little better and find out they’re not as perfect as you’d imagined.

On the other hand, sometimes your mate is going to pretty great lengths to make sure that you don’t find out something unsavory about them. So what do you do when a secret about your S.O. comes to light? How can you decide whether or not you should stay together, and, if you want to stay together, how can you move past the bad news? A good long talk or two with your partner can help you begin to rebuild trust.

How Bad Is It Really?

The first thing to do once your mate’s negative secret has been revealed to you is to assess just how bad that secret is. If you find out that your boyfriend has another girlfriend, that’s grounds for immediate breakup. If you’re a bleeding-heart liberal and your new girlfriend casually announces that she’s a conservative Republican, you might be annoyed about it, but that’s not a reason to immediately give up on the relationship.

Decide Whether It’s A Relationship Dealbreaker

You basically have to decide whether the secret is just something unsavory about your S.O., or something that indicates they will not make a good mate. In other words, if your mate tells you before the first time you have sex that he or she got an STD from their ex, that’s a problem that should be worked out. If they tell you they got that STD when they were cheating on their ex with a hooker, or they wait and tell you after you’ve had unprotected sex, that’s grounds for dismissal.

People certainly make mistakes in their life, and we do change as we mature. Finding out that your partner was quite the playboy back in college might make your heart sink a little. If he’s shown in more recent years that he can be in serious relationships, it’s worth looking past his previous mistakes and giving him a chance (though you should certainly insist he gets tested for various STD’s).

People are also allowed their own quirks and opinions. Let’s take the case of our conservative girlfriend and her liberal boyfriend. While he might initially be bothered by the fact that she believes in different political practices than he does, they could ultimately find that their opposing opinions give them something truly interesting to debate about. Additionally, just because she’s a registered Republican doesn’t mean she might not agree with some of the policies that he believes in. Some people truly can’t respect other’s opinions or beliefs, but a lot of people can. How else do people who practice completely different faiths end up together?

Talking To Your Partner About It

Once you get over the initial shock of the big reveal, sit down and have a really detailed discussion with your partner about it. If they were holding out on you about something and you discovered it via another source, you have the right to be angry that they hid something from you. That’s true whether the secret is something you can get over or not.

You need to talk to them about how they’ve damaged your trust in them, and then try to figure out how to work together to rebuild that trust. Open up about any secrets you might be keeping, and get your S.O. to do the same. Make the point to them that hiding things makes them even worse. If your partner is genuinely apologetic about keeping secrets from you, then you will be able to work together to get back to trusting each other again.

Filed Under: Relationship Advice Tagged With: breaking up, cheating, fighting, Relationship Advice, STDs

Jealousy Controls Me! How Can I Change It?

By dicksinthecity

Jealousy is something that everyone experiences at one time or another. But if it overrides you and affects your relationships, you’ve got to stop. But how?

I’m the jealous type. Big time. It affects everything. Friendships, relationships, you name it. I don’t want to be this way. What do I do?

What She Said:

It’s normal to feel pangs of jealousy, but it sounds like you’re suffering from more than an occasional twinge. The good news is that this problem is actually a great opportunity for you to examine your own life!

While you’re at it, be sure to show your friends some gratitude. They obviously love you and are supporting you while you go through this painful period.

What It Really Is

Jealousy is really an outgrowth of fear – fear there’s not enough to go around and that you won’t get a piece of what is available. It’s a belief in lack – lack of opportunity, money or love. Jealousy is also usually a sign that you’re not following your dreams. If you’re sated in your life, there’s no call for ill will when others are happy with theirs.

What makes you feel jealous when you get together with your friends? Is someone glowing because her love life is going swimmingly? Do you envy your pal’s promotion? Is someone raving about getting to decorate her new fab pad? Whatever it may be, note it – these are your triggers, as well as your clues.

Using A Journal

Start to journal after you meet with your friends. Notice what makes you cringe. Now sit back and go over this list. These are the things most likely missing from your life. There’s an easy fix – now that you know what’s bumming you out, you can take control and start working on getting these things for yourself. There’s actually more than enough to go around! Celebrate with (and for) your friends, knowing that you can (and will) have a wonderful life as well. Once you take chances and create a fuller life for yourself, odds are that you can vanquish that painful feeling.

What He Said:

Focus on what you do have, and not what you don’t. If you don’t have a lover, partner, or anyone to have sex with, go out and get one! Don’t hang around your house moping over not having a boyfriend or girlfriend. Why would you continue to devote time and energy to perpetuating a cycle that gets you a huge serving of deep fried nothing? Where’s the upside in that? (Stop looking, grasshopper. I’ll save you the trip. You can’t find it. Because it doesn’t exist. Yeah, I know. Shocker. In other news, water is wet. Film at 11.)

The next step is to realize that your current pattern isn’t helping. Life isn’t about what’s fair, it’s about what works. Why would you keep doing something that isn’t working? No real reason. It’s just a habit, and you’re in it.

Breaking The Habit

The next step is to realize that this is a habit that you created and you can break. So break it. It may be a bit uncomfortable at first, but realize that you can break it and it will happen if you are dedicated and consistent on your path. If nothing else, just start by doing the exact opposite of what you normally would. That will help enormously.

Give yourself permission to move into this new space because your success is guaranteed if you don’t quit and continue to do the work. Enjoy!

Filed Under: Relationship Advice Tagged With: fighting, jealousy, Relationship Advice

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