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You are here: Home / Archives for sex tips

How To Naturally Last Longer In Bed And Give Your Woman The Best Sex EVER!

By lloydlester

Premature ejaculation can make sex terrible for both you and your lover. Here’s how you can last longer in bed NATURALLY, and give your girl amazing sex!

Let’s face it. When it comes to sex, one of the worst things that can happen to a man is not being able to last long enough to fulfill their female partners. The simple truth is that over 70% of women are unable to achieve an orgasm during intercourse. Unfortunately, a lot of the blame is placed squarely on the man’s shoulders. But there is also another truth about lasting longer and giving a woman an orgasm. Curious to know what it is?

Lasting Longer Is NOT The Key To Great Sex

Despite conventional wisdom, that is true. You see, for the vast majority of women, how you bring them to an orgasm is much more important than the end climax. Many guys want to improve their sexual stamina thinking that is the only way to satisfy a woman. It is great to have an exceptional stamina. But the thing is, most women are not able to have penetrative sex for more than 15 minutes without feeling uncomfortable or even painful, due to the vagina drying up from the constant thrusting.

What women want is really simple – proper foreplay and an emotional connection during lovemaking. Many women like oral sex, so it pays to incorporate this into your sexual routine before heading into intercourse.

Why? Well, your tongue has the strongest muscle in the human body. It can easily provide the stimulus to bring her to an amazing orgasm through clitoral stimulation using just the tongue. In addition, having an orgasm BEFORE intercourse can make her multi-orgasmic during actual sex!

So Is Stamina No Longer Important?

It is still vital in a sexual relationship. You just need to last as long as it is required to bring her to a climax FIRST. Most women need about 10-15 minutes on average to climax, so it’s great to be able to last at least that amount of time.

But more importantly, pay attention to HER needs first. Do whatever you can to bring her to an erotic boil. Adequate amounts of foreplay, oral sex or even verbal seduction can get her aroused and prime her for an easier (and faster) orgasm during intercourse.

Something “magical” happens when you are able to satisfy her first. You see, for most men, the inability to last during sex arises from “performance pressure”. But once you have given her an orgasm BEFORE intercourse – for example, through oral sex – you will no longer feel the pressure to perform. And ironically, that will naturally help you last longer and give her the wildest time in bed imaginable!

Filed Under: Erectile Dysfunction / Last Longer In Bed Tagged With: better sex, how to last longer in bed, male orgasm, orgasm, premature ejaculation, sex tips

What To Do When She Won’t Talk To You About Sex

By loveandsex

Sex tips are thought of as a road map for sex, but they are more than that. It’s about communication, and here’s what to do when your partner won’t discuss it.

When it comes to sex, communicating with your partner is absolutely essential. You’re not a mind reader – unless you’ve been with your lover for many years, you just won’t automatically know what she wants or needs in bed. Even if you have been with your partner for a substantial amount of time, it’s still a bit of a guessing game because let’s face it – you’re not a mind reader.

You can’t know what she’s thinking about, or what she wants next or whether she wants you to move a little to the left or to the right. While some women are very up front and straight forward about what they want during sex, many women are not. This is because many women grow up believing that sex should only be pleasurable for the male partner, or that it’s “dirty” and “wrong” to derive any sort of pleasure from sex. Although this couldn’t be further from the truth, their belief systems lead them to never speaking up during lovemaking.

These women aren’t going to say, “That doesn’t feel good, here, I need you to do it like this.” They’re going to smile, act like they’re into it and possibly fake their orgasm. So because communication is so important for a healthy and mutually satisfying sex life, you may very well have to take the initiative in that department.

What Happens When You Don’t Communicate

When you and your partner don’t communicate about sex, it leads to one or both partners being unsatisfied. You’ve got to talk to each other about what you both want and need, and what you like when you’re in bed together! She won’t know what you like and you won’t know what she likes if you don’t talk about it, so you’ll both be a couple of bumbling idiots in the sack, stumbling around blindly, hoping you hit the jackpot and being disappointed when you don’t. Neither of you can expect the other to know exactly what you want and what turns you on, so you have to tell each other.

When you expect your partner to know what to do during sex and they inevitably don’t do it, you’re going to be left sexually frustrated and possibly orgasm-less. The same goes for her! If she expects you to know what to do (and you really don’t) and she doesn’t tell you, you aren’t going to give her the kind of pleasure she wants and needs.

This is going to leave her very unsatisfied and possibly resentful! The problem is, it’s partly her responsibility to communicate with her about what she likes and doesn’t like during sex. Unfortunately, for the reasons mentioned above (and many other reasons) she might not want to talk about it.

Why A Woman Might Not Want To Communicate With You About Sex

Many women don’t like to talk about sex. There are many reasons for this, and if your lover doesn’t want to communicate about intercourse, it may be more than one reason! This can leave a guy feeling confused and wondering what to do. First, take a few minutes to understand her point of view. You already know that some women grow up thinking sex is wrong and that they shouldn’t get pleasure out of sex. However, that’s not the only reason a woman might not want to discuss doing the nasty.

  • She’s never masturbated before and doesn’t know herself what feels good and what doesn’t, so she can’t very well tell you
  • She’s scared of being judged or criticized for what she likes or doesn’t like
  • She’s not confident enough in herself to assert what she wants and needs in the bedroom
  • She’s more worried about your pleasure and you getting off than she is about herself
  • She doesn’t know how to put into words what she wants (or is too shy to use the words that she will inevitably have to use when discussing this type of thing)
  • She has other emotional baggage

These aren’t all the reasons a woman might not want to talk about sex – in fact, since every woman is different and has lived different experiences, the possibilities of a woman being shy about discussing lovemaking are really endless! Take heart though, because even if your girl doesn’t take the initiative to tell you what to do or how to touch her just the right way, you can still glean the information in other ways.

Non-Verbal Communication

Women will almost always give non-verbal cues about what they like and don’t like during sex. Unless you’re having sex with a statue, you’re bound to get some kind of non-verbal feedback on what you’re doing – you just have to be paying attention. Body movements are probably you’re biggest clue here, because even some women who are shy will be too shy to be very vocal during sex. But body movements are often involuntary, so you can use these as sort of a “compass” to tell you if you’re going the right way. Here is some body language that will tell you if you’re on the right track:

  • She bucks her hips towards you and grinds her pelvis against you (either against your face during oral sex or against your penis during intercourse)
  • She begins to breathe heavy and seems as though she is concentrating
  • Her skin turns pink and flushed, particularly in her face and neck
  • Her legs begin to shake
  • Her eyes close or roll back in her head

Her body will also tell you if you’re doing something wrong, or aren’t in the right place:

  • She’ll move slightly to help position you in the right spot (if she does this, go with it! Don’t fight it thinking you’re in the right spot, because you’re not! This movement is very different from what she will do if she’s enjoying it and bucking her hips)
  • She’ll shrink away from you (this usually happens if you’re hurting her in some way – for example, if your facial hair is chafing her or rubbing too hard against her sensitive clitoris)
  • She isn’t breathing heavy and can even talk or carry on a conversation
  • She doesn’t seem as though she’s concentrating or is very into it
  • Her eyes are open and she’s looking around, possibly watching television or checking out photos on the vanity

Apart from body movements, you can use her vocalizations as a clue, although many women won’t make any noise during sex whether they’re enjoying it or not. Here are some ways to tell if she’s enjoying it by listening to what comes out of her mouth:

  •  Again, breathing heavy is a big indicator of pleasure. This may be accompanied by sharp intakes of breath or moans and groans
  • She screams your name, or says, “Oh God!” (This is almost always a winner unless it sounds totally fake)
  • She says disjointed things like, “Yes, Yes!” or “Yeah….right…uh….good…yeah….”

You can also tell if you’re totally bombing it by what she’s saying or how she sounds:

  • She’s screaming your name or other things in a way that sounds less convincing than a porn star in a low budget film
  • Her breathing and vocalizations seem to be on an even keel. For example, a regular “Mmmm” sound that doesn’t seem to be at all connected with what you’re doing or how you’re changing your techniques

Also pay attention to your instincts! As naive as you may be about a woman’s pleasure, if your gut is telling you she’s just not into it, she’s probably not!

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, female orgasm, orgasm, sex tips

Is YOUR Vagina Healthy?

By serenapaige

The vagina is a mysterious organ. Sometimes it can be hard to realize whether or not your vagina is healthy. There are times when a discharge of mucus is actually healthy. For the most part, the vagina has some of the best “self-cleaning” properties on the female body.

The vagina can maintain a great balance of bacteria and can even make mucous that will wash away foreign substances. When you are wondering if your down there area is healthy, keep in mind that a healthy vagina does not have a bad odor. There are a few different reasons why your vagina could start to smell. Some of these reasons include STI’s, bad hygiene and infections.

Bad Hygiene

Bad hygiene is not something that anybody will admit to. However, when you have great hygiene you are already a one step closer to stopping vaginal odors. You can use a regular bar soap or body wash on your vagina and the outside of the genital area. Make sure that you are drying the vagina properly so it stays clean.

If you use overly scented soaps or body washes, you run the risk of creating irritation in the vaginal area. This irritation could eventually lead to infection so be careful. One of the most common infections occurs due to feces entering the vagina after a bowel movement. Remember to wipe front to back to avoid this.

Combating Infection

One of the best ways to combat infection and odors is to get a little air down there. Start to wear loose fitting, cotton underwear. This will bring more airflow to your vagina and decrease the amount of sweat to the organ. When the sweat builds up in the vaginal odors can occur. If you ever smell “fishy” down there, you probably have a bacterial infection.

There are a variety of medications that will treat bacterial infections. You can either buy something over the counter you can see a doctor to get a prescribed medication. Although rare, some women could mistaken their vaginal odors for infection when they actually have pelvic inflammatory disease. This is also known as cervical cancer. If you think that you might be at risk of PID, talk to your gynecologist about getting tested.

Avoid Douching

While douching seems like a great idea, it can actually hurt you. Despite popular belief, douching does not help treat odors. Douching is usually employed before sex to make sure that everything is clean. The problem is that when you squirt water into the vagina, you wash away the natural fluids that are used to combat infection.

Douching can increase the development of bacterial infections because it increases the acidity level. Douching can also cause the vagina to become irritable. Only douche if your doctor has instructed you to do so. Instead of douching, wet the genitals with warmer water. Do not put any of the water inside. Simply wash the outside of the vulva and then pat down your body with a towel.

Yeast Infections

One of the most common infections to the vagina is a yeast infection. A very usual symptom of a yeast infection is itching. Another sign is soreness in and around the vagina. If your vulva is red or swollen, you probably have a yeast infection. It is never recommended to have sex while you have a yeast infection. This can make your problem even worse. Yeast infections can also lead to abnormal discharges. Sometimes the discharge can be white or clear.

Other times the discharge can be gray or green. If you have a very strong fish smell, you might want to see a doctor. You could have bacterial vaginosis or trichomoniasis. Your doctor will be able to tell you what you have and what will clear it up.

STI’s

STI’s are another cause of vaginal discharge and odor. STI’s  (also known as STD’s) are generally given through unprotected sex or when a condom breaks. Gonorrhea is a very common STI that usually appears within 2-5 days after the infection has occurred. Gonorrhea can cause vaginal discharge and increased urination.

This can also cause pain or burning when urinating. Chlamydia is another STI that typically causes vaginal odor. Chlamydia can cause burning during urination and vaginal discharge. This can also cause very painful sexual intercourse. Get tested regularly to you know whether or not have come into contact with these particular STI’s. Both of these can be cleared up in matter of weeks through antibiotics.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, sex tips, STDs, vagina

What Is An Anal Orgasm & How To Give One

By loveandsex

Anal sex can be extremely pleasurable, but you have to know what you’re doing. Here’s how to give an orgasm through anal penetration alone.

You might think that an orgasm is an orgasm, no matter which hole was being penetrated, but let me tell you that is not the case.

What Is An “Anal Orgasm?”

The anal orgasm is, as you’ve already figured out, an orgasm brought on by anal stimulation, such as from an inserted finger, penis, or sex toy. All women are able to achieve it, but only a few have the luck to actually experience it. The sexual climax can be either complete or incomplete, depending on your ability to touch, and thrust her at the right moment. Some lucky ones may come to experience an anal orgasm without even stimulating the anus, but by stimulation of the buttocks and anal cleft with the tongue.

How it actually happens: typically, through stimulation of the G spot, through the wall shared between the vagina and the rectum. Yes, it’s an indirect stimulation, but perhaps that’s why so many women (and men!) praise its intensity. As a matter in fact, anecdotal evidence suggests that some women experience anal orgasm as qualitatively different from clitoral or vaginal orgasm.

So yes, anal orgasm is not just a ‘convenient’ theory promulgated by men who want to get their respective girlfriends to try it. It’s real, it’s happening and it can be taught.

There are probably three different sources of sexual stimulation produced by anal intercourse: sensation from the anus, the rectum, and the G spot. Each of these tissues send sensory signals to the brain through different pairs of nerves- the anus through the pudendal nerves, the rectum through the pelvic nerves, and the G spot through the hypogastric nerves.

The orgasm thus achieved is described ‘deeper’, more global and intense, longer lasting and associated with greater feelings of ecstasy.

How To Give An Orgasm During Anal Sex

  1. Start with a firm/soft massage of her buttocks. Use contradictory moves- to enhance pleasure- light vs. firm, teasing vs. real pinching, etc.
  2. After separating the buttocks a little bit, start massaging the area near the anus, but this time use gentler moves
  3. With a well lubed finger start by circling the anal opening with light moves.
  4. Try the analingus technique called Rose Petals, in which you move your tongue in tiny circular loops, as if you are tracing the sepals (the small green leaves at the bottom) of a rose, and then move your tongue in a circle around the rim of the anus (this is known as rimming).
  5. 5. Once you insert a whole finger or a penis and you reach the rectum, another set of pleasures are involved. The outer portion of the rectum, like the vagina, has several nerve endings. The inner portion responds mostly to pressure. Rectal pressure is particularly important to enthusiasts of fisting, a form of anal sex in which several fingers or even the entire hand are inserted into the rectum and sometimes into the lower colon.
  6. 6. When you feel she’s ready to come, if you want to facilitate its appearance, additional manual stimulation of the clitoris is advisable.
  7. Also, for women who love a full feeling, try simultaneous penetration of the anus and the vagina, pairing it with clitoral stimulation, as mentioned above.
  8. The intensity of the anal orgasm can be achieved by psychological aspects as well as physical. The anal taboo adds to the thrill of the forbidden. The most common myth against anal sex (it’s dirty!) sometimes returns as a source of kinky excitement. Rimming enthusiasts may enjoy the feeling that they are being delightfully perverse. Other people regard the anus as a secret, special place. Sharing it with a partner is an act of openness and giving.
  9. The easiest way to NOT have an anal orgasm is to become determined to have one. Seeking it will create new pressures and disrupt the pleasure.
  10. Diet also contributes to the feeling of anal pleasure. Regular bowel movements and a sufficient amount of fiber in the system prevents irritation of the bowel tissues, which causes discomfort and adds up to muscular tension.

Filed Under: Anal Sex Tagged With: anal sex, female orgasm, orgasm, sex tips

How To Prep For An Amazing Blowjob (For Her)

By loveandsex

A blowjob not only requires hygiene for him, she also needs to do a few things to get ready as well. Ladies, here’s what to do to get ready for a killer blowjob.

You might think that hygiene during a blowjob only applies to your partner being showered and trimmed or shaved down there. While his hygiene is important for both you and him, your hygiene matters too. There are a few things you want to observe before you go down on him, and many of these things may already be in your grooming repertoire. However, keep these things in mind before you go down on your lover and the blowjob will be that much sweeter.

Brush Your Teeth And Make Sure Your Breath Is Fresh

While a surprise blowjob in the morning can be lots of fun, morning breath isn’t. But dragon breath isn’t only present in the morning – you need to be aware of how your breath smells throughout the day. Most people are already concerned with this and keep gum or mints handy, especially if they have a profession in which they talk to people often or are in close quarters with others. You certainly don’t want to give your man head after you’ve just eaten garlic bread or had fresh onions on your sandwich!

To ward off bad breath before you go down on your man, consider carrying a toothbrush with toothpaste with you, tucked in your purse or pocket. There are actually travel toothbrushes out there that only require only water – they can typically be found in gas stations and grocery stores where you would find the gum. If you can’t carry something to brush your teeth, at least carry with you a pack of mint or cinnamon gum (fruit flavored gum will rarely kill dragon breath) or breath mints. Altoids are excellent because they’re small and travel friendly, but do an excellent job of fixing bad breath!

Make Sure Your Lips Are Soft

You don’t want to give your partner head if your lips feel like lizard skin. If your lips are dry or cracked, they can make your lover uncomfortable when you rub them up and down the skin of his penis when you’re giving him head. You want your lips to be kissably soft – because you’ll likely be kissing him on the lips too!

A great way to soften your lips on the fly is to use a toothbrush with plain water (another reason you should have a toothbrush handy). Dip the brush in water and “brush” your lips like you brush your teeth. You don’t want to do this as hard as you brush your teeth – make sure you’re using soft, gentle strokes. This will exfoliate your lips and remove the flakes of dry, dead skin that are responsible for rough lips.

When you’re finished brushing your lips and they’re soft and smooth, apply a good lip moisturizer or lip balm. This is something else you want to keep handy. Apply it regularly to keep your lips soft and in fellatio ready condition.

Have Clean, Soft Hands And Trimmed Nails

You’ll likely be using your hands at some point on your lover’s genitals when you’re going down on him, whether you’re just holding his penis in place for you to work on it, or using your hands as part of the action. Keeping your hands clean and soft is just as important as brushing your teeth and keeping your lips soft!

First thing’s first – you’ll want to make sure your nails are clean and trimmed or filed. Hangnails or ragged nails can be exceptionally uncomfortable if you accidentally end up poking or scraping your man when you’re giving him head. It’s an excellent excuse to get a good manicure! Exfoliate your hands with a good scrub and lotion them up afterwards, so you have the most gentle touch possible when you put your hands on your partner’s genitals. If you do get a manicure, they’ll cover the exfoliation and the lotion as well – so getting pampered with a manicure means you’ll actually leave the salon with blowjob and handjob ready hands!

Filed Under: Oral Sex Tagged With: blowjob, fellatio, oral sex, sex tips

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