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5 Little Known Female Orgasm Secrets

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The biggest mistake when it comes to “female orgasm” is focusing on the “how-to” techniques without paying proper attention to the best mind-set and strategies to make her climax.

In reality, the strategies are the key to unlocking the power of the sexual techniques.

You’ll understand that while sexual techniques by themselves can be effective, the noisy, wet, toe-curling orgasms lie largely in the strategy you use when applying the techniques.

Mindset

Your state of mind (and your partners’) can really make or break the chances of her having an orgasm.

The Wrong Mindset

How do you approach your lover’s orgasms?

You probably enter into sex with the intent and goal of “giving an orgasm.”

It’s this approach that leads too many guys on a wild goose chase for the “perfect” strokes and techniques. It leaves you blindly seeking out every tip and trick out there, furiously testing them out on your lover.

I hate to break it to you, but this is the wrong mental approach if you truly want to “give” a female orgasm.

It sounds contradictory, I know. But it’s true, and here’s why…

When you head into the bedroom with the goal of “giving” her an orgasm, you’re setting up expectations in both of your minds. This approach will create pressure on both you and your partner that an orgasm MUST happen. Once you add pressure to have an orgasm, it is virtually guaranteed to add some negative stress and anxiety during your intimate times together.

And…as this stress grows, it will actually make it much harder for her to cum.

Have you ever seen a football or basketball player “choke up” during a game?

The fans, the crowds, the competition build up so much pressure for the athlete to perform well that their focus is diverted from the game and to their anxieties.

Ultimately, they wind up screwing up. Too much focus and drive on your part to “give” an orgasm can have the same effect on your partner.

Effects of Stress on Your Partner

If the stress and pressure get too high, she may be left unsatisfied. And because you have set this “goal” to have an orgasm in a first place, and now that the goal is un-met, both you and your partner will be left feeling disappointed.

If this approach is sustained, you may wind up anchoring these feelings of disappointment to your times of physical intimacy – carrying it over into your next sexual encounter, further increasing her “performance anxiety.”

The Right Mindset

Here’s the paradox…

If you want to give an orgasm, you have to NOT focus on the orgasm!

Instead of focusing on the goal of achieving the elusive female orgasm, start focusing your attention on the pleasure of the process.

The key is, if you focus on giving pleasure, and making sure she’s feeling good, that orgasm will come (no pun intended.)

Communication

Not every technique will work on every woman. One woman may prefer one particular stroke or rhythm more than the next woman does.

To find out what really makes your woman tick, you’ve got to open the lines of communication. You need to find out what she likes as you’re applying a technique.  That way, you can optimize your rhythm, speed, stroke etc. to match what she likes best.

Aim for open verbal communication, but if your lover isn’t as brave with her words (especially when you’re face is buried between her thighs) you can opt for more non-verbal communicative methods, such as squeezing hands or body response.

Communicating well with your partner can make it much easier to bring her pleasure, and ultimately, more and better orgasms.

Escalation

One of the biggest mistake men make is moving too fast, too soon.  It works fine for us, but for a woman, she might not be ready yet.

For guys, we can come to an orgasm very quickly.  Men basically need to get aroused, stimulated, and we’re done.

Women, on the other hand, need a gradual escalation to come to a point of orgasm.

With each of the stages of sexual response (you’ll find out about this in an upcoming chapter), the intensity of the stimulation is increased.

Anticipation and Tension

Anticipation (otherwise known as “teasing” and “excitement”) is a powerful and effective tool to use.

In order to multiply the effects of your sexual techniques, you’ll have to add anticipation into the mix.

Anticipation will get her more aroused, give her a greater chance to have an orgasm and focuses her on the physical pleasure she’s experiencing.

And…while you’re building up anticipation, at the same time you’re cranking up sexual tension as well.

The sexual tension will have to be released (in the form of an orgasm).

The Key to Building Anticipation

The key to building up anticipation is to focus on the areas surround the main “target” before you actually hit the target.

For example, you can do this by rubbing her inner thighs, buttocks and hips before actually touching her vagina.  While you’re rubbing those body parts, she’s getting wetter and wetter by the second, anticipating you to finally move onto her vagina.  At the same time, the tension is growing within her and at some point, it’ll have to be released.

A note: when you’re building up the anticipation in her, it’s going to build up in you as well!  It’s going to be your job to maintain self control, and keep the escalation at the right pace.

Relaxation

A woman has to be completely relaxed to have an orgasm.

If she has her thoughts on her job, self-conscious about how her body looks, trying to have an orgasm, or whatever the case may be, she’s not going to be relaxed.  She’ll be tensed, and her body won’t allow her to release an orgasm.

Your job?

To help those troubles melt away and disappear (even if only temporarily) with your words, touch, attitude and preparations. Your lover must be totally and completely relaxed and free from tension.

The only tension she should be feeling is sexual tension!

Give Before You Receive

Before receiving any sexual pleasure from her, you have to make sure she receives sexual pleasure from you first.

Why?

It shows that:

1) You have control of your sexual desires

2) She’ll be in a more “ready” state to have an orgasm while having intercourse, and

3) After she has an orgasm, she’ll be ready and willing to reciprocate to the best of her abilities!

Seriously, if you can compare the quality of the blow job she gives you, the one performed without her experiencing an orgasm FIRST, will, ironically, SUCK compared to the blowjob she gives you after she RECEIVES an orgasm.

Sex goes the same too… Go ahead and test this out for yourself if you don’t believe me!

How To TRIPLE Your Lover’s Orgasm Intensity

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An orgasm is one of the most earth shattering experiences for a woman. Learn how to make it THREE TIMES as intense with these hot sex tips!

You’re going to discover the most powerful tool for unlocking screaming orgasms from your girl –  so get ready! What it is is actually quite surprising, because:

It’s NOT having a huge penis.

It’s NOT some crazy sex position.

And it’s NOT a pill, a toy, or a special “spot” technique.

Nope. The most powerful tool for unlocking screaming orgasms from your girl is actually:

Her brain!

Why The Brain Is Such A Big Deal

For men sexual pleasure is MOSTLY physical. You see a hot woman, great ass, nice breasts, and a pretty face – and these “assets” of hers trigger a biological signal to your body that makes you want to be intimate with her. You don’t care what kind of car she drives, what she does for a living, or even if she can speak!

But for a woman, the biological “trigger” for sexual pleasure is VERY DIFFERENT.

Your girl isn’t staring at your chest, your legs, or your penis. In fact, even if she’s staring at Brad Pitt, yes, she’s going to find him attractive – but women never get that same URGE that men do.

So what DOES trigger that bioligical response in a woman?

It’s when you make her FEEL a certain way. Women THRIVE on emotions. Unlocking your girls emotions – and being able to influence her emotions in bed — is extremely important for female pleasure. This is ESPECIALLY true when it comes to giving a woman what she really wants: mind-blowing, body-shaking orgasms!

When A Woman’s Orgasm Occurs

The female orgasm occurs when a woman is totally in the moment, and allows herself to surrender her emotions and control of her body to you.

Read that again. It’s important.

The best lovers are can get INSIDE A WOMAN’S HEAD and make her feel very strong emotions during lovemaking. Any woman will tell you that her strongest orgasms are those that are the most emotional for her. Sure, physical orgasms such as the g-spot, deep spot, oral sex, and clitoral are great. However, the next level is being able to not only stimulate her to have physical orgasms, but AT THE SAME TIME involve HER BRAIN.

And THAT is when she’ll really be blown away!

So the key to giving her these intensely stronger orgasms is to lead her to the emotions you want her to feel.

Talk Her Into Orgasm

This doesn’t mean CONVINCE her into it. It means lead her into it gently with dirty talk.

As she is getting close to peaking (you can tell by: moving her hips up and down, moaning loudly, gets VERY wet, says she is about to come) gently encourage her in a low, slow voice by saying any of the following:

  • “Come for me baby”
  • “Get really wet and come for baby”
  • “Relax baby and come for me”

Now, those lines may sound cheesy to you, but they work and here is why:

For a woman to orgasm intensely she has to TOTALLY give up control of her body. When you give her this gentle reassurance that she CAN trust you and give up control, she will have an extremely intense orgasm. It’s that simple.

Enjoy this technique and remember, INTENSE ORGASMS start in her MIND.

Orgasm Dilemma – What To Do If You Can’t Have One & Your Guy Gave Up

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An orgasm isn’t always easy for a man to give, and he can quickly get discouraged if he can’t find a “formula” to get you over the top in what he views as a reasonable period of time. But should you just forget about ever reaching orgasm during sex at all? And is it really only up to him to learn how to give you pleasure?

A Woman’s Orgasm

It’s not easy to make a woman orgasm, and unfortunately, many guys give up before they’ve ever learned how to make their partner climax. A woman requires a clear mind, a relaxed body, emotional immersion and the right physical stimulation to get over the top. Finding the right combination of these things (which could differ on any given day depending on the woman’s mood) can be daunting at best. Don’t put all the blame on your guy though – having an orgasm starts with YOU.

Start Masturbating

How can you expect your guy to learn what pleases you if you don’t even know? How can he learn how to bring you to an orgasm if you can’t even do it yourself? You know what gets you relaxed. When you touch down there, you know immediately if it feels good or if it doesn’t. Face it – he can’t tell what you like or don’t like unless YOU show him or tell him! It’s not like as soon as he touches you or licks you he knows whether that stroke worked or not.

Don’t turn your nose up at “clicking your own mouse” – there’s nothing wrong with female masturbation and it’s one of the only paths to supreme sexual bliss for a woman (that is, unless you’re with a total Casanova but even then, all women are different and he may not know how to please YOU). After masturbating a few times, you’re going to learn that you like it this way but not that way. You’ll figure out that you can reach orgasm faster if you do it like this, not like that. You’ll come away with a better understanding of your body and your sexuality, plus lots of new ways to play.

So grab a vibrator, use your fingers or whatever else you want and indulge in a explorative solo session. Do what feels good. Remember what it is. Do it again. Repeat.

Teach Your Man

When you find out what works, let your guy know. Don’t expect him to find out all on his own, that’s just cruel. He can’t – you don’t have a magic indicator that lets him know when he’s getting warmer or if he’s doing things the right way. If you prefer circles on your clitoris as opposed to an up and down motion, by all means tell the guy! He’ll appreciate it so much more than if you let him stumble around in the dark and get upset when he doesn’t do the right thing.

A lot of girls are too quiet during sex. They fail to let their man know what feels good during sex, so he never really knows. Many girls don’t make a peep, or much noise at all whether it feels incredible or whether it hurts like hell. So a guy will try and try and try, but will soon give up because he doesn’t feel like he’s getting anywhere. If this describes you, take a long look in the mirror if you want someone to blame for not getting off during sex. You cannot expect your guy to get it right if you don’t give him any feedback. Period.

How To Let Him Know What You Like

Dirty talk is an excellent way to not only let your lover know what really gets you going, but also to spice things up and add variety to your sex life. Dirty talk in and of itself can get you more turned on and closer to orgasm than ever before, not to mention its added use for communication of likes and dislikes.

Next time he makes a move that feels better than the rest, say “Oh yeah, just like that.” If he’s in the wrong place and suddenly moves to the right one, shout “Yes! Right there!” Don’t be afraid to get into it, he’ll think it’s hot. You can even use dirty talk to get really naughty if you want to. Tell him, “I want you to ____ my ____ right now until I ____ all over you!” Ad lib as necessary. After the initial shock and disbelief that these things are coming out of your mouth, you’ll love voicing what you want until you’re coming.

Overcoming Shyness

If you’re too shy to tell him outright what you want either during a normal dinner conversation (yes, it’s perfectly appropriate to say “Hey honey, I’d like to try ___ tonight” over braised chicken) or during sex, then you might think you’re out of luck and will never be able to communicate your desires to your lover. Wrong! You can, without using any words at all!

Just make more noise when he does the right thing. Body language is also a big indicator that he’s on the right track too. Gasp, moan, shout his name, buck your hips – do anything to let him know that you really LOVE what he’s doing. If he never gets this feedback from you, he’ll assume that every single thing he does is wrong – and then give up.

He may change his moves around and try to do something different, but he’ll figure out what you enjoy the most pretty quickly when you stop moaning when he does the wrong thing. That’s right – if he starts getting off course, you’re not going to be as vocal. He will automatically take that as a cue that he needs to go back to what he was doing before, when you were moaning, screaming and bucking wildly.

The icing on the cake? He’ll actually do what you want – meaning, you might actually get off.

3 Things All Men Need To Know About The G-Spot

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If there’s one topic about sexual health which is controversial, that is none other than the female G-spot. Some experts say that there is such a thing as a G-spot which brings a woman earth-shattering orgasms when stimulated. However, there’s this other part of the spectrum wherein skeptics say that the G-spot does not even exist. Tantric sex practitioners believe that this ‘sacred’ spot is like the Holy Grail when it comes to the erogenous spots which turn a woman on.

But whether it exists or not, what’s important is that men can use the G-spot to bring their partner to the ultimate in sexual heights. Read on to find out more about the G-spot.

The G-Spot, and Nothing But…

First, let us try to delve deeper into what this controversial G-spot is all about. This is actually named after gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg who discovered the part within a woman’s vagina which is able to bring her to the peak of sexual heights way back in 1944.

The G-spot is more of a zone than just one particular spot – and it’s located right inside the vagina, about one to two inches within the frontal wall. If you insert a finger within the vagina, you should make a come hither motion and look for a bean-shaped tissue which feels rougher than the rest of the vaginal wall.

The sensations that a woman is bound to feel when her G-spot is stimulated actually depend on the individual. For some women, the G-spot is indeed the Holy Grail of all her erogenous zones which can provide hours of mind-numbing pleasure. For some, stimulating the G-spot too much may produce a sensation like you need to urinate – while others do not seem to be sexually affected by the G-spot at all.

Now, from a man’s perspective, it might be a bit difficult to bring your partner to great sexual heights through her G-spot if she herself does not know whether she has it or not. So communication is an essential key here. Just as it is when exploring a different aspect of your sex life, familiarizing the both of you with the female G-spot should be a fun and shared experience that will bring you closer together.

The Top 3 Things That Men Should Know About The G-Spot

So here are the top three things that men should know about the G-spot:

1. What to do with the G-spot

Now that you already have a basic idea about where the G-spot is located, the next thing that you need to know about is what exactly you should do with it. Basically, the best way to stimulate the G-spot is by stroking it directly or making a tapping motion using your fingertips once you’ve managed to locate it.

As mentioned earlier, you can use your forefinger and make a come hither motion once your finger is inserted about a couple of inches inside her vaginal wall. It should be pointing towards the direction of her belly button.

2. How to feel the G-spot during intercourse

The next thing that every man should know about when it comes to the G-spot is how to feel it during intercourse. Since your penis does not have the dexterity of your fingers, you would need the help of a woman in order to be in a position wherein her G-spot will be stimulated.

A woman-on-top position, a rear entry position and the doggy style position are all geared towards giving her a G-spot orgasm. These sexual positions will benefit you, too, in such a way that the variety will be as much of a turn on as knowing that you are both working towards each other’s pleasures.

3. The role that G-spot stimulation plays in female orgasms

Finally, it helps for men to know just how important a role the G-spot plays in female orgasms. A lot of women claim that they experience female ejaculation or female orgasms when the G-spot is stimulated.

All in all, familiarizing yourself with the G-spot is just one of the many aspects of sex that you can explore together as a couple. Whether your female partner thinks that she has it or not, what’s important is that the process of discovery will be highly, sexually stimulating for the both of you.

Clitoris 101: 3 Things Men Need to Know about the Clitoris

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Would you like to be a master lover and bring your partner earth shattering orgasms in bed? It doesn’t even matter whether you have an average, below average or above average-sized penis. As long as you’re familiar with the female parts which are located down south, you will be able to keep women begging for more – because you’re that good in bed.

Why it’s Worth it to Pay Attention to the Clit

 

For men, the answer to the question about which part of the body can be considered as their most erogenous zone, the answer is easy: the penis. All the sexual sensations are concentrated to that area below the hips and above the legs. In the area of oral sex, as long as a woman agrees to go down on you, you’re bound to experience an orgasm no matter how long or short a time she’s willing to spend on giving you some oral love.

For women, however, the answer is a bit more complicated. First, when it comes to her erogenous zones, there are her breasts and her vagina that you can focus on. Second, the vagina, unlike the penis, can be considered as an unchartered territory for most men. This is because the vagina is composed of different parts: the inner and outer labia or lips, the clitoris, and the G-spot which is located about a couple of inches inside the vaginal opening.

But one thing’s for sure: if you want to give that special woman in your life an orgasm that she’s not bound to forget anytime soon, you can go for either the clitoris or the G-spot. Here, let us try to focus on learning about the clitoris.

The Top 3 Things that Men should Know about the Clitoris

Take a look at the top three things that men should know about the clitoris:

1. The ‘anatomy’ of a clitoris

Simply put, the clitoris is that tiny bud located just above the opening of her vagina, right at the top of her inner labia. Experts say that this is the only human organ which is solely dedicated for sexual pleasure. So just imagine just how mind blowing her orgasm will be if you target this spot.

The clitoris is as packed with sensitive nerve endings as the head of your penis and it becomes engorged when a woman is aroused. Don’t go heading immediately after her clit when you have sex, however. The clitoris can be extremely sensitive so she needs to be prepared to take it in, so to speak.

Another crucial information about the clitoris that every man should know about is this: most women do require clitoral stimulation – whether it’s orally or though penetration – in order to achieve an orgasm.

So if you seriously want to improve your skills as a lover, now is as good a time as any to learn everything that there is to know about the anatomy of a clitoris.

2. How to play with the clitoris

Before heading down south, remember that women need more than physical stimulation to be totally into the sexual act. Turn her on by using flirting glances, compliment her with your words and most importantly – never skip the foreplay. If you manage to get her as aroused as she can be before her clothes come off, the more intense things will be later on.

Now, there are two ways for you to stimulate her clitoris. You can either use your tongue and mouth, or your fingers. When deciding to use the latter, start by caressing her legs while working your way towards her inner thighs. Then, touch her outer vaginal lips before making contact with the area just above her clitoris, since direct stimulation might be painful for her.

The second method, you are probably already familiar with: cunnilingus. Using your mouth and your tongue, you can bring her to a mind blowing orgasm by eating her out. Enough said.

3. How to bring sexual fulfillment through clitoral stimulation

At the end of the day, it all boils down to the fact that vaginal intercourse alone is about as exciting for a woman as a bumpy ride on a beat up car. If you want to take her to new sexual heights, never take the clit for granted. Try to communicate or learn her body language so that you’ll know when to go faster or harder, when to stop or not stop.

Through clitoral stimulation, you will be able to send that special woman in your life to greater sexual heights and give her the best ‘ride’ of her life.