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You are here: Home / Archives for Sex & Intimacy

Sex Tips & Advice

5 HOT Fingering Techniques

By loveandsex

Fingering isn’t as “old school” as you might think. If you do it the right way, you can bring your lover to incredible orgasmic heights!

There are some moves that just don’t work without a lot of lubrication, even if you aren’t penetrating her yet. A drop or two just won’t do and most women will appreciate a bit of extra lube for these techniques, even if she is already lubricating on her own.

1. The Electric Slide

Place the tip of your middle finger over her clitoris, then slide the entire length of your finger by, slowly, keeping constant contact with her little bud. Don’t move too fast. Keep a steady hand and don’t put too much pressure on her sensitive parts. She’ll let you know if she wants to go further.

You may want to separate her lips a bit to ensure more intense sensation, but remember that if you move your hand upward toward her during fingering, you will be pushing her clitoral hood out of the way. As you slide your hand back toward her feet, you will push the hood back in place, covering her up and allowing a relief from any intensity. Take your time learning which direction she loves best, and how heavy a hand she prefers.

2. The Tick-Tock Clit Clock

This fingering move is designed to give you a better idea of which sides or spots around her clitoris are the most sensitive to touch. Use a well-lubricated finger on a well-lubricated clitoris, holding her lips apart, exposing her most sensitive area. Imagining her clitoris is a clock face. Use your slick fingertip to trace a small circle around the outside of this clock, stopping and rubbing in even smaller circles at every hour. This will be a bit more difficult than with the previous exercise, working with such a small space, but you may be surprised at what you find.

3. Jack & Jill

Now don’t get me wrong here. I’m not trying to say that her clit is the same as a penis, but I am saying that you don’t have a monopoly on jerking off. Called “jacking” by a lot of men, modern day sexperts like to refer to this little move as “jilling off.” Welcome to a whole new world of clitoral stimulation! Give this a read, then go and welcome your wife.

The essential factor of jilling is to stimulate the clitoris by pumping it, through the protective sheath of the clitoral hood, which acts like a foreskin for the clit’s sensitive head. Use the outer edge of your hand, under your baby finger, to push up gently on the mons and expose the clit. From this position, you can use the thumb and forefinger from the same hand to feel for the clitoral shaft.

Probe around beneath her clitoral hood, where it begins from the crevice of her inner labia. You will be able to feel the stem protruding and should be able to gently grasp it between your fingers. From this position, massage it up and down in steady, rhythmic motions. Keep your fingers on the shaft and don’t pull the clitoral hood back too far. You may not feel like your movements are doing much, but you should be able to tell from her reaction how many nerve endings you are hitting with this one!

4. Knuckle Down

This second-last move is only for masters of jilling, really just a modification of that fingering technique. Having found that super-sensitive clitoral shaft, you have a variety of techniques available to you with this little nub in your hand. Instead of using your fingertips, this method uses the knuckles of your index and middle finger to grasp and stroke the shaft. Don’t forget to experiment during fingering! A change in speed or pressure could make all the difference in making this orgasmic.

5. Turning On

You might have a hard time jilling the shaft if her clitoris is small, or the hood is very tight, but don’t fret! Using either fingertips or knuckles, as in the last two fingering techniques, instead of pumping the shaft, you can turn it from side to side like a key in a lock. Keep your fingering rhythm and don’t try to go too hard or too fast.

This particular movement is probably the best way to mimic her masturbation technique, though you’ll certainly want to take a good look at it before you make a comparison. Either way, this kind of direct clitoral stimulation is definitely at the top of a short list of fingering moves that will let you make her come single-handedly.

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: better sex, female masturbation, fingering, foreplay, masturbation, sex, sex tips

How To Achieve The Holy Grail Of Sex – The Simultaneous Orgasm

By serenapaige

A simultaneous orgasm can be a super hot and emotionally gratifying experience. Here’s how to achieve what is known as the “holy grail” of sex.

A simultaneous orgasm is something that a lot of couples strive for. This concept can even be something that people worry about on a constant basis. The most important thing to understand about a simultaneous orgasm is that it does not define your sex life or your relationship. People put way too much weight on climaxing at the same time.

Just because you and your partner to not have an orgasm the same time every time doesn’t mean that you have a problem in your sex life. However, if you would like to achieve a simultaneous orgasm, there are a few things that you can do in order to improve your chances.

1. Know That It’s Not Easy

There are men and women that have control over their orgasms and there are men and women that can’t keep it at bay for too long. When you are trying to achieve a simultaneous orgasm, it is important to realize that it might not be that easy. Timing your orgasm with your partner can put a strain on the relationship that is really not needed. Different partners have different sexual needs to even reach an orgasm in the first place. Don’t be afraid of failure and you will be much more likely to put each at ease during sex.

2. Prolonging Can Be Bad

Prolonging an orgasm by either a man or a woman is never a good idea. Some men find that prolonging their orgasm during sex makes it that much harder to actually have one. This can also make them that much more sensitive to premature ejaculation. Taking a man to the edge of his orgasm and then making him stop could be a recipe for disaster.

After prolonging the orgasm, the man could be that much more likely to have an uncontrolled climax during the same session. Forcing a woman to prolong her orgasm can also be bad. When a woman prolongs her orgasm, it can be harder to get her back up to the level of being able to climax.

3. Use A Lot Of Foreplay

Having a simultaneous orgasm is much harder for women than men. At the drop of a hat a man is usually able to achieve orgasm during sex. Using a lot of foreplay on a woman will bring her to edge of climax much more quickly. Guys, use oral sex and fingering to get her primed to have a female orgasm and you will find it much easier to achieve a simultaneous orgasm. Using manual stimulation on the woman’s clitoris during sex will give you much better results in trying to come together.

4. Use Multiple Orgasms To Have A Simultaneous Orgasm

One of the best tricks is to use multiple orgasms to have a simultaneous orgasm. If the girl can have multiple orgasms then the two of you will much more likely to be able to reach your goal. Not all women can have multiple orgasms, however, if your partner can, you can use this to your advantage. Although you might not be able to reach orgasm during the first one or even the second, you can have a simultaneous orgasm on the third or fourth.

5. Do Kegels

Kegel exercises can help a man control his orgasm during sex. If your boyfriend or husband has a problem with premature ejaculation, he should start to use kegel exercises during the day. These exercises can help him old his orgasm in rather than having to pull out and wait a few seconds for the sensation to pass. When a man has found the ability to control the muscles that affect his orgasm, he will easily be able to hold it in until the woman has reached climax.

6. Practice

Practice always makes perfect. When you are trying to have a simultaneous orgasm with your partner, it is important to keep the goal in mind during sex. Use all of these suggestions to help you master the learning curve and get to where the both of you are happy with your sex life. Remember that there are going to be times where you are not both coming at the same time. If you even hit 50% then you are doing better than most couples on the planet. Practice with each other and communicate during sex so you can both come together.

Filed Under: Orgasm Tagged With: better sex, female orgasm, orgasm, sex, sex tips, simultaneous orgasm

Are You Making These Mistakes During Sex?

By lloydlester

Sex doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but when you make mistakes you can really screw things up. Are you making these common sex mistakes?

Most articles on sex tips tell you what to do. But how often do you read one that tells you what NOT to do? There are many mistakes that men make in bed that turn off women quicker than the latter could say “not tonight”. Well, read on and see if you are guilty of committing any of these lovemaking “boo-boos.”

1. Lack Of Confidence During Sex

Confidence is a great asset that any guy could have. When it comes to sex, confidence is what gets a man going and giving his female partner an unforgettable night. A woman loves a man who is sure of his ability to charm her in bed. So once you have set your mind on a night of great lovemaking, don’t waver in your attempts and give up too soon. Sometimes, women give out mixed signals of not wanting sex when they actually yearn for it. Show her you know what you are doing. Create a romantic ambiance, sip on some wine and add a touch of sizzle through music. Once you get her in the mood, follow through with some sensual foreplay and amp up her temperatures for the night!

2. Making Out The Same Way All The Time

Do you use the same sex position each time you have sex? What about making love in the same place at and the same time, every time? Falling into a routine is probably one of the easiest ways to take the fizzle of out any sex life. Why not put the passion back into lovemaking by trying out new things, new positions, new places to make out? Even something as simple as making out on the floor instead of the bed can make a whole lot of difference in your sex life!

3. “Tuning Out” During Sex

Ever had sex when your mind is not really into it? Many men are guilty of this too! The worse thing you could do is to start making love and then stare into space! Here’s the thing: If you are too stressed to make love, or if you are simply too distracted by something at work to give her a great time in the sack, there is always another time.

So the next time you plan to give your lover a great time in bed, it would be wise to look back and reflect on whether you have been making any of these lovemaking mistakes.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, sex, sex tips

Get Ready For Hot Sex TONIGHT!

By loveandsex

Sex involves some preparation first if you want it to be really good. Here’s how you can get ready for hotter sex tonight!

Cleanliness Is Next To Sexiness

A big turnoff for a woman is a guy with bad hygiene. You need not just be neat and tidy to keep her interested, but also to prevent infection from bacteria and foreign materials, as you are going to be putting fingers in some of her most sensitive places.

Shower and shave or wash your facial hair thoroughly. Brush your teeth, put on some clean clothes, use deodorant. Trim your fingernails the day before, so you have a chance to wear down any sharp edges. Clean under your nails and, most importantly, wash your hands! Use soap and water, and if you have rough spots or calluses, use a pumice stone to soften these areas. Dab on just the slightest hint of a cologne you know she loves, or an aphrodisiac scent like sandalwood or vanilla, and then get ready to set the mood.

Figure Out Your Sex Routine

You don’t want to walk into the bedroom, spread her legs and lay out a set list of all the moves you want to try on her tonight. Not only will she think you’ve gone nuts, but you’ll be too distracted trying to figure out what comes next to focus on what’s happening right now. Take your time to practice a couple of the simpler moves from each chapter, some labia and clitoral stimulation, and some penetration.

Plan to spend at least an hour, from foreplay to finish, especially if you are exploring the possibilities of G-Spot orgasm. Don’t cut corners, and do remember to take your time on every step, from desire, to arousal, to orgasm and back again. Be calm and confident, and if you stumble on something she doesn’t like, just move on to the next thing you had in mind. If you run out of ideas, ask her to show you or, better yet, improvise!

Create A Sex Playlist

One of the best ways to create a setting for love is through the use of music. Rhythm is super important to the female orgasm, so pop in some tunes before the big event. Try to mix it up, with slow and sensual, get-down groovy and fast-paced frenetic in a cyclical manner. This will allow you to work up to arousal and orgasm slowly, reach a climax (hopefully in more ways than one!) and start all over again at the buildup.

Set The Scene

While music is a great start to setting the scene, think about how your wife described her “ideal erotic experience” and see what you can do to turn your bedroom – or living room, or kitchen, or back yard – into the place in her dreams. What was it about this dream world that you can recreate here and now?

Try appealing to all her senses: soft lighting like candles or a crackling fire, something to drink like hot cocoa or wine, a light snack to nourish your bodies and make refueling sexy, like cherries and grapes, and soft comfortable surfaces like lambskin or soft sheets and warm blankets. If you don’t have a fireplace or a campfire roaring nearby for lighting, try adding a space heater or cranking up the furnace a bit for the experience. Your naked skin and hers will be grateful during this time of exploration.

Get Her Consent For New Activities

Informed consent is required if you’re going to try something new, and you’re not sure whether she would like it or not. Just being married does not give you the right to do whatever you want to your wife. There are some things that you just have to talk about before you do them, like anal sex. You can’t just put it in there and expect her to be cool with it. If you haven’t discussed anal play, you don’t have consent. If you don’t tell her that you want to make her squirt, she might feel like she doesn’t have your consent to ejaculate, especially if she is self-conscious about making a mess, (or worried about having to clean it up all by herself) so bring it up at your earlier discussions.

If you have an inspired idea in the heat of the moment, you don’t have to put it off for later, but you do need to approach her to make a decision about how far she is willing to go with you. If your finger slides a little too far south and she jumps, don’t just pretend that nothing has happened. Apologize for startling her and tell her you thought she might enjoy something new. If she isn’t interested, you will just as happily move on to something else. No pressure.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, orgasm, sex, sex tips

Foreplay Moves That Guys Love

By dicksinthecity

Foreplay isn’t just for girls – guys actually enjoy foreplay before the action too. Check out these steamy moves guaranteed to make him hot.

First things first, foreplay was not invented for men. Most men are just in it for the benefit of women. Bless those men! Still, some men don’t give a crap about women. Of course, those men are jerks. If we are going to focus on foreplay moves based solely on pleasing men then all you need to know is that men are all about their penis.

Men are wired to go from 0-100 in sixty seconds. So any sort of “special moves” you think you need to learn or “erogenous zones” you think you need to touch are pretty much moot. I’m not saying women should forgo foreplay on a man all together, lets not get lazy here ladies, I’m just saying that the foreplay can all be penis focused.

What She Said About Foreplay Moves:

Focus On His Penis During Foreplay

That’s it. Men do not need long make out sessions, neck kissing or back massages. Once a guy is aroused, the only thing he is thinking about is how long it will take you to stop fussing with him and get your hands on his penis. So get a hold of that python and get comfortable.

Praise His Penis

Once you have laid eyes on his penis, tell him how big, huge, gigantic, large, superior it is. Any adjective that makes his penis sound like the biggest one you have ever seen. You can even say “That is the biggest one I have ever seen.” If you are not into talking, then gasps of surprise and arousal are always a wonderful move that guys dig. Once you have spent a few seconds admiring, its time to move on to the next foreplay move.

Work His Penis

You’ve seen it, you’ve commented on it and you’ve “oohed” and “ahhed.” Now you just have to touch it. So stroke it, caress it, give him a handjob. Keep an eye on your man and see what sort of pressure he likes and how he likes his penis to be pleased.

Put His Penis In Your Mouth

Just like stroking his penis with your hand, do it with your mouth. Although you have more opportunities with your mouth, saliva is a wonderful tool and your tongue is the strongest muscle in the body. Use your spit, use your tongue! Kiss his most prized possession, lick every where. Pretend its an ice cream cone or sucker and start giving that man a blowjob.

There you go. Four easy steps and in all honestly, most likely he was aroused and ready to go before you even got to step one. Foreplay for men doesn’t have to be an all day affair. They can get hit by a gust of wind and be aroused. I am not saying all men are solely about their penis for foreplay, but lets face it, that is where they want to be touched, licked and praised. So you can save yourself a lot of time and energy by focusing your foreplay on his best friend. Even after these tips, I’m pretty sure you could have probably just leaned over and whispered “Lets have sex.” That comment alone would have been all the foreplay you needed to do.

What He Said About Foreplay Moves:

There’s this notion that foreplay is for women. Men love foreplay too. Why? Cause we’re tired of doing all the damn work. We have to jump through all these hoops to get your number, to get you to go out with us, to get you into bed, and then you just take your clothes off and expect us to instantly begin dispensing the multiple orgasms. Really?

Why can’t men enjoy foreplay?

Just massage him. Give him a good one and get him relaxed. Work out the knots. You might think this is in his best interest, but really it’s in yours. The more relaxed and tension free he is, the longer it will last and the better it will be. He’ll be all zen like and won’t be focused on racing to the finish line, rather, he’ll be overjoyed with how good he and it feels and his pleasure will be enhanced, and then he’ll hit it like a rock star.

Filed Under: Foreplay Tagged With: better sex, foreplay, oral sex, sex tips

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