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What Is An Anal Orgasm & How To Give One

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Anal sex can be extremely pleasurable, but you have to know what you’re doing. Here’s how to give an orgasm through anal penetration alone.

You might think that an orgasm is an orgasm, no matter which hole was being penetrated, but let me tell you that is not the case.

What Is An “Anal Orgasm?”

The anal orgasm is, as you’ve already figured out, an orgasm brought on by anal stimulation, such as from an inserted finger, penis, or sex toy. All women are able to achieve it, but only a few have the luck to actually experience it. The sexual climax can be either complete or incomplete, depending on your ability to touch, and thrust her at the right moment. Some lucky ones may come to experience an anal orgasm without even stimulating the anus, but by stimulation of the buttocks and anal cleft with the tongue.

How it actually happens: typically, through stimulation of the G spot, through the wall shared between the vagina and the rectum. Yes, it’s an indirect stimulation, but perhaps that’s why so many women (and men!) praise its intensity. As a matter in fact, anecdotal evidence suggests that some women experience anal orgasm as qualitatively different from clitoral or vaginal orgasm.

So yes, anal orgasm is not just a ‘convenient’ theory promulgated by men who want to get their respective girlfriends to try it. It’s real, it’s happening and it can be taught.

There are probably three different sources of sexual stimulation produced by anal intercourse: sensation from the anus, the rectum, and the G spot. Each of these tissues send sensory signals to the brain through different pairs of nerves- the anus through the pudendal nerves, the rectum through the pelvic nerves, and the G spot through the hypogastric nerves.

The orgasm thus achieved is described ‘deeper’, more global and intense, longer lasting and associated with greater feelings of ecstasy.

How To Give An Orgasm During Anal Sex

  1. Start with a firm/soft massage of her buttocks. Use contradictory moves- to enhance pleasure- light vs. firm, teasing vs. real pinching, etc.
  2. After separating the buttocks a little bit, start massaging the area near the anus, but this time use gentler moves
  3. With a well lubed finger start by circling the anal opening with light moves.
  4. Try the analingus technique called Rose Petals, in which you move your tongue in tiny circular loops, as if you are tracing the sepals (the small green leaves at the bottom) of a rose, and then move your tongue in a circle around the rim of the anus (this is known as rimming).
  5. 5. Once you insert a whole finger or a penis and you reach the rectum, another set of pleasures are involved. The outer portion of the rectum, like the vagina, has several nerve endings. The inner portion responds mostly to pressure. Rectal pressure is particularly important to enthusiasts of fisting, a form of anal sex in which several fingers or even the entire hand are inserted into the rectum and sometimes into the lower colon.
  6. 6. When you feel she’s ready to come, if you want to facilitate its appearance, additional manual stimulation of the clitoris is advisable.
  7. Also, for women who love a full feeling, try simultaneous penetration of the anus and the vagina, pairing it with clitoral stimulation, as mentioned above.
  8. The intensity of the anal orgasm can be achieved by psychological aspects as well as physical. The anal taboo adds to the thrill of the forbidden. The most common myth against anal sex (it’s dirty!) sometimes returns as a source of kinky excitement. Rimming enthusiasts may enjoy the feeling that they are being delightfully perverse. Other people regard the anus as a secret, special place. Sharing it with a partner is an act of openness and giving.
  9. The easiest way to NOT have an anal orgasm is to become determined to have one. Seeking it will create new pressures and disrupt the pleasure.
  10. Diet also contributes to the feeling of anal pleasure. Regular bowel movements and a sufficient amount of fiber in the system prevents irritation of the bowel tissues, which causes discomfort and adds up to muscular tension.

How To Prep For An Amazing Blowjob (For Her)

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A blowjob not only requires hygiene for him, she also needs to do a few things to get ready as well. Ladies, here’s what to do to get ready for a killer blowjob.

You might think that hygiene during a blowjob only applies to your partner being showered and trimmed or shaved down there. While his hygiene is important for both you and him, your hygiene matters too. There are a few things you want to observe before you go down on him, and many of these things may already be in your grooming repertoire. However, keep these things in mind before you go down on your lover and the blowjob will be that much sweeter.

Brush Your Teeth And Make Sure Your Breath Is Fresh

While a surprise blowjob in the morning can be lots of fun, morning breath isn’t. But dragon breath isn’t only present in the morning – you need to be aware of how your breath smells throughout the day. Most people are already concerned with this and keep gum or mints handy, especially if they have a profession in which they talk to people often or are in close quarters with others. You certainly don’t want to give your man head after you’ve just eaten garlic bread or had fresh onions on your sandwich!

To ward off bad breath before you go down on your man, consider carrying a toothbrush with toothpaste with you, tucked in your purse or pocket. There are actually travel toothbrushes out there that only require only water – they can typically be found in gas stations and grocery stores where you would find the gum. If you can’t carry something to brush your teeth, at least carry with you a pack of mint or cinnamon gum (fruit flavored gum will rarely kill dragon breath) or breath mints. Altoids are excellent because they’re small and travel friendly, but do an excellent job of fixing bad breath!

Make Sure Your Lips Are Soft

You don’t want to give your partner head if your lips feel like lizard skin. If your lips are dry or cracked, they can make your lover uncomfortable when you rub them up and down the skin of his penis when you’re giving him head. You want your lips to be kissably soft – because you’ll likely be kissing him on the lips too!

A great way to soften your lips on the fly is to use a toothbrush with plain water (another reason you should have a toothbrush handy). Dip the brush in water and “brush” your lips like you brush your teeth. You don’t want to do this as hard as you brush your teeth – make sure you’re using soft, gentle strokes. This will exfoliate your lips and remove the flakes of dry, dead skin that are responsible for rough lips.

When you’re finished brushing your lips and they’re soft and smooth, apply a good lip moisturizer or lip balm. This is something else you want to keep handy. Apply it regularly to keep your lips soft and in fellatio ready condition.

Have Clean, Soft Hands And Trimmed Nails

You’ll likely be using your hands at some point on your lover’s genitals when you’re going down on him, whether you’re just holding his penis in place for you to work on it, or using your hands as part of the action. Keeping your hands clean and soft is just as important as brushing your teeth and keeping your lips soft!

First thing’s first – you’ll want to make sure your nails are clean and trimmed or filed. Hangnails or ragged nails can be exceptionally uncomfortable if you accidentally end up poking or scraping your man when you’re giving him head. It’s an excellent excuse to get a good manicure! Exfoliate your hands with a good scrub and lotion them up afterwards, so you have the most gentle touch possible when you put your hands on your partner’s genitals. If you do get a manicure, they’ll cover the exfoliation and the lotion as well – so getting pampered with a manicure means you’ll actually leave the salon with blowjob and handjob ready hands!

Is Monogamy Overrated?

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Monogamy seems to be the popular choice for couples in long term relationships – but is it necessary? Can you have a satisfying relationship without it?

What Other Relationship Options Are There?

You can’t argue that monogamy isn’t exactly the one size fits all relationship type we were taught growing up. Don’t believe me? Just hit the internet! It seems like there are all kinds of relationships out there (open relationships, swingers, polyamorists, just to name a few) and they all seem sexier than monogamy and they’re getting way better press too.

Is It Still Sexy?

Religious organizations will argue that monogamy is under attack. Really? I didn’t know swingers were breaking into people’s homes and making them have sex with other people. While monogamy isn’t exactly under attack, it’s kind of lost its luster. It’s about as sexy as flossing or paying your taxes on time. Sure, there’s something to be said for it, but there’s a good chance that something will put you to sleep.

That doesn’t make monogamy overrated, any more than a gun in and of itself is a bad thing. It depends on the application and the situation. If you go on a date and your date pulls out a hand gun, it’s probably not a good night for you. If a burglar is breaking into your home and you call the cops and all they do is try and put the bad guy on “time out” you’ll be wishing he/she was packing heat (get your mind out of the gutter people!).

It’s Hard Work

Monogamy isn’t what we thought it was. It’s not like you get in a monogamous relationship and then that’s it. Since you’re not having intercourse with other people by design, you have to work to maintain the spark, probably a lot harder than non-monogamous people, because they have the benefit of the spark that comes with being with and being desired by other people.

It’s Also Safer

Then again, monogamy, by default, may not be sexy, but it is safer. Since you’re aren’t fucking other people (as long as there is no infidelity) then you don’t have to worry about AIDS, herpes or any of those STD’s that scare the shit out people who are fucking around. You don’t need to wear condoms, if you’re not screwing other people and since you know you’re both clean and safe, you can do all kinds of crazy sex, wild intercourse, anal sex and whatever else you like with a clean conscience (and clean health record).

That can make monogamy seem a bit more appetizing. If variety is the spice of life, then monogamy is like eating your vegetables. People who practice non monogamy (I wonder if they ever got it right yet) will argue that monogamy is dead and that it can’t work and that it will always end with infidelity or a sexless marriage. That’s crazy. It’s statistically impossible that all monogamous relationships end up like that. Some of them have to be really great. Some married people have to be fucking more than porn stars, right? It’s just simple numbers.

Decide For Yourself What Is Best For You

Monogamy seems overrated largely because we get such a bad view on it. Sex sells and if it bleeds it’s news. Fear sells. No one is going to buy a copy of People Magazine to find out about the happily married celebrity couple that have been monogamous for years, have amazing sex and fall more in love every day. You just don’t hear about that. You know why? It’s nothing compared to the crazy coke head celebrities who go off and have sex with the poolboy all while living in an apartment.

Monogamy is what you make of it, assuming you decide to make something of it in the first place. You may not want to. That’s cool too. If you are into it, great! If you’re not, that’s great too. Just keep your mouth shut to the people who don’t share your view point. You can’t change them and just because monogamy (or non monogamy) doesn’t work for you doesn’t mean it doesn’t work for them. Monogamy isn’t overrated or underrated. That’s like saying Spicy Brown mustard is over rated or underrated. It’s mustard people. That’s it. You put it on your hot dog, if you like it on your dog, and if you don’t well, you don’t.

It’s really that simple. Monogamy is what it is. It’s not good or bad, it just means you don’t mess around. Well, with anyone other than your husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend. It’s not rocket science. If it works, it works. If it doesn’t it doesn’t. If your relationship ends it’s not monogamy’s fault. It’s yours.

5 Sex Games To Play When You’re Bored

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Sex games are great way to not only improve your sex life and intimacy but to also sure a common problem of boredom around the home. Many couples find that six games can be an excellent way to pass the time on rainy weekends or as a way to break up the monotony during the week.

If you would like to increase the intimacy in your relationship while also spicing up your sex life, these sex games are the cure you have been looking for. Here are 5 that you and your partner will love when you’re bored.

1. Meeting For The First Time

If you have ever had a one night stand you know the excitement that comes with meeting a new person. Building of the sexual tension between the two of you and not really knowing the other person can be a powerful aphrodisiac. If you’re looking for great sex game to play meeting for the first time can help you live out a fantasy of meeting your partner in a whole new light. Pick a local bar that you can meet each other at.

Have your partner dress-up and go to the bar at a specific time. Meet your partner at the bar and pretend that you’re both meeting each other for the first time. Try to pick up your partner and take her back to your place. Reenacting this one night stand scenario is an excellent way to live out fantasies that you have never explored before.

2. Power Control

Power control is a great game for couples who like to mix up the dominance in the bedroom. Get an egg timer and set it to 3 minutes. Determined which partner is going to be dominant first. Allow the egg timer to start and that partner will be the dominant one until the timer has reached the three minutes.

Once the timer has reached the three minutes, the dominance will shift to the other partner. Reset the timer each time. See how long each of you can last under this power struggle game. If you or your partner has an affinity for being the dominant or the submissive one in the bedroom, you will definitely find that this game will bring you out of your comfort zone.

3. Blindfold

The blindfold was made for sex. In this game, you or your partner will be blindfolded on the bed. They have to keep the blindfold on the entire time. The other partner must tease and caress their partner while the other doesn’t know what to expect next. This is a great game that you can play with each other and it incorporates trust and intimacy into the relationship. One of the features of this game is that it relies on the element of surprise and anticipation. The only rule to the game is that you can’t peek.

4. Master/Slave

It’s not the most original game, it’s a staple for a reason. The master slave relationship is usually found in the BDSM scene, but you can use a much more light version of the game for your regular romps in the bedroom. One of your is the master and the other is the slave. You can choose whether or not to blindfold, tie up or do anything else you deem appropriate to the slave. The slave must abide by all of your rules at all times.

If you are the master, make sure that you’re not pushing the limits on what your partner is going to feel comfortable with. The last thing that you want is for them to break character instead of being completely enticed with your sexual dominance.

5. Strip Poker

Strip poker has been seen in movies, TV shows and in the adult industry for a reason: it’s fun! Try your hand at strip poker with your wife or husband to really get a prize for winning. If your partner does not know how to play poker, teach them. Each time they lose a hand, they lose a piece of clothing.

If you really want to make things interesting, each of you can also bet sexual favors. For instance, you can bet a blowjob or an erotic massage on the hand instead of clothing. This is one of the best games to play on a rainy night or on a weekend getaway. Make sure that you have a proper deck of cards so there is no cheating and so neither of you has an unfair advantage over the other.

Are You Following These 4 Rules Of Foreplay?

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Foreplay is essential for great sex, but do you really know what you’re doing? Here are some before sex musts that you definitely don’t want to avoid.

Most men and women do not understand these rules and are, as a result, not as good at foreplay as they could be. These are important to learn now because when you and your partner are in the heat of the moment, you won’t have time to check back with each other. So let’s take a look at how the rules of it work.

1. No Genital Touching

Foreplay does not involve genital touching. Some couples I’ve worked with had the belief that if the woman was giving the man a handjob or if the man was playing with her clitoris, then they were engaging in foreplay. WRONG! It does not involve touching your partner’s genitals in any manner.

So when it comes to it, keep your hands away from your partner’s vagina until you know that she is well into the second stage (plateau). Also, if she tries to touch your penis, you should pull her hand away. By holding back, you’ll be increasing sexual tension in both of you.

2. Oral Sex Isn’t Foreplay

Foreplay is not the same as oral sex. Another problem I’ve encountered with couples is that they falsely believe that oral sex counts. While it’s true that some people would agree with that idea, the truth is that oral sex is just another variation of vaginal intercourse.

Also, refer back to the first guidelines and keep your hands (and your tongue) off of each other’s genitals.

3. Go Slow!

It should be slow. It is not meant to be a quick hurdle men have to jump over to get to the finish line. Instead, it is supposed to be a slow, gradual increase in sexual arousal and tension. When it’s done properly, women become so aroused that they will actually beg for penetration. Imagine how that would make you feel as a lover!

4. Foreplay Can Happen Anywhere!

It can begin anywhere. Another misconception about foreplay is that it must begin in the location where sex is going to happen. For example, if you are going to have sex in the bedroom, then foreplay starts when you get into the bedroom. WRONG!