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You are here: Home / Archives for lube

How To Become The Sensual Seductress Your Man Fantasizes About!

By brendalyttle

Most sex tips are going to be lost on you if you’re hiding your erotic side. However, these sex tips will teach you how to become the naughty girl your guy wants!

If racy undergarments, racks of sex toys, and adult videos make you want to hide beneath the sheets, you sure are oblivious of what real moments of ecstasy and fun feels like. It is indeed a curious exhilaration to discover your sensual side and embrace a whole new world of sexual fun.

Before we get to the point, the first of these sex tips would be – relax! Put your guards down and you, the uptight lot – think less, and feel more. Now that you are ready to experience the best of your body and carnal desires, here is a list of suggestions that would transform you into a seductive tigress:

Wear Sexy Lingerie That Reveals Your Curves Just Right

When you feel sexy, you look sexy. If thongs are what caters to your fancy, try going in for a nice lace thong that has a wider back to ensure better comfort, like the popular 4811 thong from Hanky Panky, or the Never Say Never by Cosabella. Another secret is hidden in boy shorts. Guys love them – really! So get yourself one that fits you, and gives a small glimpse of your cheeks. Sometimes the idea of sex is itself so erotic. Lace boy shorts are a good pick.

Also, you cannot deny how hot garter belts are! You can either keep them hanging loose on your bare legs, or simply clip them to some thigh-highs. Both ways, it’s gonna be irresistible!

Dive In With Sex Toys

Do not complicate. Since you would be a beginner with sex toys, start on with anything that is small and easy to use. A LELO Mia or Nea are discreet choice for masturbation. For some adventurous fun, the We-Vibe and Pleasure Commander are some of the best selling sex toys for couples. One thing that you must not forget is that these are mere toys and not a replacement of your lover – they simply make lovemaking more fun and brings in versatility to your bedroom.

Try Lube

Silicone-based lubes, such as Pjur or Swiss Navy are great choices as they do not contain any biocides or parabens, and often remain slippery for a longer duration, in comparison to their water-based counterparts.

Be sure to stick to glycerin-free lubes, as anything that contains glycerin is bound to have sugar that can instigate yeast infection. Lubes that have warming ingredients have also been known to have caused some allergic reactions, so they are also a big NO! But you can always take lube in your hand and rub them for a few minutes, it will warm up on its own.

Watch Some Good Porn

Yes, there are adult videos that both men and women can enjoy together. Anything that will have some stimulating foreplay and a bit of storyline will get you started well. Couples videos usually make for a good watch as they normally focus shots, face shots, have attractive performers, as well as more sensuality that will get you going between the sheets right away. The Masseuse starring Jenna Jameson or the Chemistry Series starring Tristen Taormino are a big hit among the couples. Eyes of Desire or The Bridal Shower are some good bets if you want some story to go along with it.

Grab Some Erotic Books

Instinctively you may be thinking of picking up some how-to books to explore new ideas. There are many books out there that can inspire you immensely. A game of truth or dare, or reading aloud an erotic fiction to your lover can also ignite that fizzle and make the passion burn forever.

Creativity in bedroom keeps boredom out of your relationship and entwines you with him for love, lust and more, that is bound to last until eternity.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: female masturbation, have better sex, lingerie, lube, masturbation, porn, sex tips, Sex Toys

Lube – The Lowdown On Why You Need It And What To Get

By loveandsex

Lube is essential for sex to be really great – no matter what you might have heard before. Here’s what to get and why.

Why Lube?

Sexual lubricants add a lot to the lovemaking process. Depending on their function, timing, and use, they can help a woman achieve orgasm faster, make sex feel better, and alleviate uncomfortable aftereffects (like chafing or burning). Sure, your own spit works just fine it’s free, always available, and works. But it only works for a short time, and sometimes you want a lubricant that will last a bit longer, taste somewhat different, or serve another function that will heighten the sexual pleasure for both of you.

Factors That Decrease Lubrication

There are some factors that will add or decrease from a woman’s natural lubricant, such as:

  • Age: Plays an important part of the lubrication process. As a woman gets older, she stops producing as much natural lubrication because of hormonal fluctuations.
  • Having Kids: It’s common for a woman to have extra moisture when she’s pregnant, and less when she’s breastfeeding. Blame it on the hormones again.
  • Drugs: A large number of drugs (both prescribed and otherwise) play with a woman’s wetness. Any medication that warns of dry mouth, antidepressants, cold medicines and alcohol all contribute to lower lubrication.
  • Stress and Travel: Stress reduces anyone’s sexy feelings, but travel could go either way. Some folks use traveling as a way to relax and enjoy some space away from home, but those who travel for work, for instance, may see it as a chore or necessity. Some women who fly a lot have even coined a term called ‘lube lag’, where they find their natural lubrication severely reduced because of their lengthy travel times.
  • Condoms and Dental Dams: Even though lubricated themselves, condoms have a tendency to dry a woman out, so make sure to have extra lubricant on hand when playing with either.
  • Menstrual Cycle: It goes without saying that during a woman’s cycle, the amount of lubrication available to her is going to differ. However, you’ll notice that, for some women, the middle of the month (around ovulation) is when she’ll be the wettest, only secondary to when she’s actually menstruating.
  • Extended Sex Sessions: If you’ve ever had a marathon oral sex session, you’ll be nodding your head as you read this. Not only will you feel raw and dry after about 30 minutes of stimulation, but she’ll be walking a bit funny the next day because of the lack of wetness.

Different Types Of Lube

There are different types of lube to look out for when going shopping. Look for these:

  • Water Based: Most lubricants on the market today are water based, such as the infamous KY Jelly. This type of lubricant is most people’s favorite because it doesn’t stain and can be used anywhere on the body even ingested in small amounts so there’s little worry when going down on a woman. Having said that, even the best water-based lubricants dry out with extended use, and some folks have developed allergies to them.
  • Oil Based: Oil based lubes are fantastic for anal play, because they last forever and warm to the touch. They are also lovely for body massage. The only caveats with oil-based lubricants is that they make things so slippery that condoms and dental dams can slide right off, as well as if you’re using latex based products, the oil in the lube will break the latex down.
  • Petroleum Based: These lubes, such as Vaseline or baby oil, are also great for anal play, but they will degrade condoms or dental dams and can potentially cause infections in a woman’s vagina so most people avoid these lubricants.
  • Silicone Based: It isn’t as easy to find silicone lubricants as the others, although most sex shops do carry them. They have a silky, soft feel to them and last longer than all of the other types other than oil-based. They are safe to use on all parts of the body and will not stain. However, make sure to test silicone lubricants before using them internally, as more than a few people have allergies.

Whichever lubricants you decide on with your partner, just remember to not squirt it directly on your partner. Instead, put the lubricant in your hands, rub them together a bit, and warm it before putting it wherever it is you’d like to get slippery.

Filed Under: Oral Sex Tagged With: condoms, lube, personal lubricant, sex tips

How To Lick Her Clitoris And Make Her WET!

By loveandsex

Oral sex can be divine for a woman. If you do it just right, she’ll be dripping on the sheets when you’re done.

Men are incredibly penis-centric beings. They love to look at it, touch it, talk about it, and some men even name it! However, women are not as into your penis as you are. In fact, they tend to orgasm significantly more often when it’s not your penis doing the job. The vaginal wall has very little in the way of nerves. It’s the clitoris, which is on the outside, that makes the O-face happen. That is, if you treat it right.

Don’t Go Straight For The Clitoris!

Do not just dive right in. It will only irritate her. I know you’re thinking, “But it feels so awesome every single time someone touches my penis, so how can it not be the same for chicks’ clits?” The clitoris and the penis are extremely similar in shape and function, but there are some differences. Her pleasure organ is largely internal, and not as weathered as your well-beaten member, so it is quite a bit more sensitive.

She Gets Erect Too, You Know

When she is in a neutral state, the head of her clitoris is exposed. The head is the home to over 8,000 nerve endings, which is why it is so much better than your penis is at having orgasms, but also why your fingers feel like cheese graters on her under-stimulated organ.

However, when the woman is aroused, the erectile tissues fill with blood, and the clitoris becomes erect (sound familiar?) In its erect state, the head slides under the clitoral hood where it is protected and coated with sebum produced in her body. Meaning, she gets wet.

Wetter Is Better

The importance of wetness can never be over stated. Without it, you shouldn’t even bother to get an erection, because she’s not going to let you touch her with it. So how can you achieve that desired state? Well, you could immediately run to your trusty water-based, mango flavored lube, dump it in your hand, smear it all over her vulva, and jam your penis in there, or you could do it the way she likes it.

That means foreplay. A sweet kisses, nipple biting, and everything in between is what she really needs. If you can provide her with ample stimulation before you even go near her clitoris, it will significantly cut down on the awkward prodding that takes place when you try to go in cold.

Lick Slowly And Softly

Start out by licking slowly and softly, as though you were enjoying a delicious treat – because you are! You may think that as soon as you put your tongue down there she’s going to explode, but she’s going to need plenty of time to build up an orgasm. So don’t rush it!

Lick her clitoris every few times, in between licking the rest of her vulva as well. Yeah, the clitoris is where it’s at, but her labia and vaginal opening have super sensitive nerves that feel divine when you run your tongue over them. Do all of this and she’ll be dripping by the time you’re done!

Don’t Forget About The Rest Of Her Body Too!

Women are walking erogenous zones. They don’t have just the one sex organ that is the epicenter of awesomness. A woman’s whole body is covered in little spots that get them hot. Where those exact spots varies from woman to woman, and day to day. But figuring out where they are is all part of the fun.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: clitoris, female orgasm, foreplay, lube, oral sex, orgasm, sex tips

How Much Anal Sex Is Too Much?

By loveandsex

Anal sex requires some gentleness to begin with – you’ve really got to be aware of how hard you’re going, how fast you’re going and how much lube you’re using (probably not enough!) If you follow all of the anal sex “rules,” you should be pretty safe – but what if you’re doing it pretty much non-stop? Sure, you’re observing all of the precautions, but how can you tell if you’ve gone overboard with the backdoor action?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OORQSqlL7WA[/youtube]

Taking Precautions With Anal Sex

If you’ve read anything about anal sex at all, you probably already know that you have to take precautions. It’s not at all like vaginal sex. The anus doesn’t lubricate itself, so you want to make sure to use plenty of lube when you do engage in the backdoor fun. Also, going slow, communicating and working your way up in size (do not start with a giant dildo) is in order when it comes to anal sex. The tissue of the anus is very tender and thin, and can tear easily, so always be gentle and slow!

Make Sure You’re Relaxed And Aroused

A vagina can often be penetrated at any time – lube or no lube. There have been countless women who have succumbed to their partner’s wishes for a “quickie” and got it on without being relaxed or aroused – but the sex still took place, right? Not so with anal sex. The receiving partner must be relaxed and aroused for this to work properly! If the anus is not relaxed, it is going to be much, much more difficult for anything to be inserted – if it is possible at all.

Also, lube is not optional for anal sex! You may think it is for vaginal sex (and in some cases it is, but lube is always handy), but it is absolutely MANDATORY for backdoor action! Use a good, thick lube that doesn’t get sticky or dry out easily.

Starting With Sex Toys

A lot of people like to start anal play by using sex toys. This is because they can start small and work their way up (often, starting with just the fingers or a penis is too much at first) – and that’s a good thing. You can start with a tiny butt plug (they make ones that are really small) and graduate to larger objects as you become accustomed to the feeling. Always make sure that your anal sex toys have a flared or ring style base, or they can get lost in there!

When To Stop

It’s not hard to tell when you’ve had enough anal sex – in fact, knowing when to put the brakes on things is relatively easy. If you experience pain at all, it’s time to stop! Plain and simple. There’s no grey areas here – if it hurts at all, find something else to do! Other reasons to stop may be if you notice any bleeding, or if you just feel like something isn’t right. Listen to your body and when it tells you that it’s had enough, you should know it!

The “amount” of anal sex that crosses the line varies from person to person. One person may not be able to tolerate as much as another, so only you will know what the right “amount” is for you. Again, let your body guide you. If you feel discomfort, pain or just want to stop, go ahead and stop!

A Note On Desensitizing Lubes

Never use a desensitizing lube on your anus during any type of anal play. This actually “numbs” the area from feeling pain – which can seem like a good thing, but it’s not. If you’re not aware of any pain during anal sex, it’s likely something could go very wrong and you wouldn’t be aware of it until later. Pain is your body’s way of saying “Stop!”

Symptoms Of Anal Sex That Is Too Intense

If you’re having anal sex that is too intense or goes overboard, you may notice these things:

  • If you’ve been using big sex toys, such as a large butt plug (or your partner has a really big penis), you may notice that your anus stretches and it becomes more and more difficult to control your bowel movements
  • Pain or discomfort that goes beyond just when you’re having anal sex
  • Bleeding or hemorrhoids

Communicating With Your Partner

Communication is essential for successful anal sex. You want to be in constant communication about what feels good, and more specifically, what doesn’t. If something hurts, don’t be tempted to just “endure it” or “push through it” just because your partner enjoys it. And if you’re the giving partner, you definitely want to be asking your lover if everything is going okay on a regular basis.

Filed Under: Anal Sex Tagged With: anal sex, anal sex toys, lube, sex tips, Sex Toys

4 Things You Need To Know About Anal Sex

By loveandsex

Ah, anal sex. Depending on the person, it is the greatest fantasy or the worst turn-off. Some women run in fear at the thought, while some practically beg for it. There are men who will do anything to get in the backdoor, and others who couldn’t imagine putting it in the poop shoot (FYI, not even all gay men like anal). If you’re one that wants to see what all the fuss is about, here is a step-by-step guide to making it a pleasurable, or at least tolerable, experience for both. Warning: this is a high-risk activity.

Use Plenty Of Lube

Unlike the vagina, the anus does not produce its own lubrication. Use a water based lubricant. You can get something flavored if you want to put it on her before you stick your tongue in there. However, never, EVER attempt anal sex without lubrication. It will cause tearing in her anus, not to mention a lot of pain.

Relaxation Is Key!

Have her take some deep breaths. Perhaps you can give her a massage first to loosen her up. If she is a little ball of tension, it causes the sphincter to tighten. If that’s tight, you’ll never get in. Engaging in some oral sex or other foreplay to get her turned on is one of the best ways to get her to relax.

Warm Her Up First

Slip a finger in. Start small, especially if this is her first time. Meaning, use your pinky. Once you’re all lubed up, glide it in and out slowly and gently to get her used to insertion. Next try your ring finger. Really work it out. Insert it, swivel around, tickle. The more time you can spend the better. If she can’t handle your finger, she sure as hell won’t be able to handle your penis. That is, and I hope for your sake, if your penis is larger than your digits.

Go Slow

Now you’re ready. Don’t go jabbing your member straight into the no-no hole. You will be immediately kicked out of bed, maybe forever. Particularly amongst anal virgins, this needs to be gradual. Tease the anus a bit, and then slide in just the head. Pull out, and then slide it in a little deeper. Keep doing it until you can comfortable get it all the way in. Don’t add speed or pressure until she is ready for it. Well, now you can take it from here.

Filed Under: Anal Sex Tagged With: anal sex, lube, sex tips

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