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You are here: Home / Archives for lingerie

5 Things Guys Really DON’T Want In Bed

By Kaylen Jackson

Sex tips tell you what to DO in the sack, but how do you find out mistakes to avoid? While men want to do a lot of different things in the bedroom, there are some things that just don’t strike his fancy and may very well turn him completely OFF. You don’t want to do that! Here are the things that your guy would really rather you leave OUT.

He Doesn’t Want To Try “Butt Stuff”

This applies to “butt stuff” on HIM. Most guys enjoy anal sex with women, but the street doesn’t go both ways. Although you can give him a totally fierce orgasm via prostate massage, he’s not likely going to be very receptive to it unless he’s very adventurous. Suggesting that you put a finger up his anus while giving him a blowjob might get you a strange look, or it may get you thrown out of the bedroom depending on how much the “butt stuff” freaks him out.

Some guys will politely turn you down, while others will be convinced that you’re trying to turn them gay and run for the hills. Read your man – if he likes a lot of naughty stuff, he might be into it. If he’s more of a “vanilla” guy, don’t even bother bringing it up.

Lingerie That Has Too Many Clasps, Buttons, Zippers, etc.

Does he love seeing you wear sexy lingerie? Hell yeah, he does! But he also wants to take it OFF. And if taking off whatever you’re wearing is more like diffusing a bomb than getting you undressed sexily, your man is going to become frustrated well before he ever gets to see you naked. Keep this in mind when choosing lingerie.

Garter belts are totally hot, but they’re also a pain in the ass to get on and off. If you want to go that route, just leave them on during sex and make sure he has full access to your breasts and nether regions. If you want to wear something sexy to bed, go for it. Just make sure your guy can actually get it off of you in a short amount of time. Because honestly, if you do the lingerie right, he’s going to want to rip it off you ASAP anyways.

Watching Porn With You

Lots of sex tips suggest watching porn with your partner to help you and him get aroused before sex. Yes, your guy watches porn. He likes it, he masturbates to it, but he doesn’t want to watch it with YOU. There could be many reasons why, such as he had a past girlfriend totally freak out on him about it or he just really enjoys you so much that he doesn’t want his attention drawn to other women (we’re going to pretend it’s the latter – it could be true).

Unless your guy suggests it or brings it up, leave it alone. Let the porn stay on his computer or under his bed and let him enjoy his solo time with it just like that – solo. But don’t be afraid to get your own porn stash going – if porn turns you on, why don’t you watch it the way he does? Solo?

Drunk Sex

Lots of great sex has been born from having a few drinks beforehand. But great sex does not come from being so totally sloshed you can’t get your underwear off. Yeah, we’ve all had our crazy nights and have woke up wondering what the hell happened (and from what you can remember, it was pretty damn fun) but that’s not something your guy wants to do all the time. In fact, being completely shitfaced during sex is probably something you want to save for one night stands, mistakes you’ll regret later, etc. and so on.

Another thing to note here is that if he drinks too much, it’s likely he’ll have “liquor dick” and won’t be able to get or maintain a good erection. So yeah, he doesn’t want drunk sex. Feel free to engage in having a few drinks beforehand to take the edge off and lower your inhibitions a little bit, but know when to put the drink down and head to the bedroom.

Kinky Sex That Goes Too Far

Many sex tips resources assume that all men like kinky sex and the kinkier the better. This is actually far from the truth. While most guys will enjoy the occasional bondage scenario (such as being handcuffed to the bed for a blowjob) or spanking their girl during doggy style, kinky sex that goes too far is actually going to scare you partner away. Don’t be afraid to try new things, but breaking out the cock cage, leather whip and dog collar will ensure that you’ll never see hide nor hair of your man again.

This is, of course, unless your man is super into kinky sex (which you would have already known if he is). If he’s just your average Joe, learn how to give an excellent blowjob instead. That will impress him far more than whipping out all the sex toys and kinky stuff in your nightstand drawer.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: anal sex, have better sex, kink, lingerie, porn, prostate massage, sex tips

What To Do When HE Is Lazy In Bed!

By loveandsex

Sex tips can often help you get out of a rut, especially when you’re putting more effort in than your lover. Many times in a relationship, the sex gets boring because one or both partners get comfortable and start doing the same thing over and over. If you want a super hot sex life, you have to bring variety to the table! Use these sex tips to get him trying new things!

Normal Sexual Progression In A Relationship

Often, sex can get pretty lame when you’re in a relationship – especially if your relationship is long term and you and your partner are monogamous. Many times what will happen in situations like these is that one or both partners start getting comfortable with the relationship and the sex, and don’t bother to use their imagination to come up with new things. It often happens to guys because once they figure out the “secret formula” to getting their girl to reach orgasm, they stick with it! They don’t want to go trying different strokes, techniques or sex positions because they found what works. If it’s not broken, why fix it, right?

This is not at all uncommon, however, that doesn’t make it any less frustrating. Girls don’t always want “A + B + C = Orgasm” sex. They want passion and variety! They want to experiment. A girl can spice things up in the bedroom but she’s got to have a game plan first.

Stop Bitching

One of the biggest reasons guys get less interested in making sex adventurous over time is because their partners get more and more comfortable griping about this and that. Women often do this because as the “warm fuzzies” begin to wear off as the relationship gets older, annoying habits start becoming more and more apparent. Most of the time, they’re not make-or-break-the-relationship types of things – but as a girl gets more comfortable with her guy, she will often want to “fix” him. She’ll think that by telling him what she doesn’t like that he’ll stop and start doing things her way.

You may think your nagging is letting him know that you don’t like a certain behavior, but all it’s really doing is killing his sex drive. He doesn’t see it as you gently guiding him in the right direction – he sees it as nagging, bitching, griping, etc. He’ll still leave his dirty underwear on the floor but he won’t bother taking yours off and throwing them down next to his.

Make An Effort To Be Sexy

While he probably thinks you’re cute in your flannel pajamas, if that’s all you’re wearing, he’s going to start seeing you as non-sexual and just wonderfully cuddly. While this can be an advantage on those cold days when you just don’t feel like doing anything but snuggling up in your man’s arms, if this is all you’re getting, you’re going to wonder what happened to make your guy not want to have sex with you as much anymore, or just not care about trying new things.

The truth is, he wants BOTH sides of you. Sweet, cuddly and wearing flannels without makeup. But other times, he wants to be reminded that he’s with an incredible sex vixen who will ride him all night long! So make a point to wear lingerie to bed sometimes. And heels. When you look sexy, you feel sexy. When you feel sexy, you look sexy. Don’t forget that confidence is truly the sexiest thing you can wear. Rock it like a bombshell and he’ll be on fire!

Don’t Underestimate Sex Games

A fantasy box is an incredibly fun, non-threatening way to introduce your lover to new things and ideas when it comes giving him sex tips and letting him know what you want in bed. This can be as simple or as elaborate as you and your partner want it to be. You can indulge your crafty side and make a fun fantasy box, or use something you have around the house. The more you put into this fun sex game, the more you get out of it. That is, unless you have some damn good imagination. If you do though, it won’t matter one bit if all you have is bar napkins and a Styrofoam cup.

With the “fantasy box” sex game, you and your partner each get to write a secret fantasy that you’d like to try out. Write a few down, three from each of you is a fun number to start with. What you actually write down can range from tame to super kinky, but agree on how hot you’re going to get before you start – you can always start small and up the ante later. It will be pretty awkward if you write down “Spank my ass hard and call me your whore while having sex doggy style” and his says “french kiss for 10 minutes.”  Consider thinking of different “levels” of how hot you want it to be, and decide on a “level” before you start writing down your ideas.

Throw your slips of paper in the box, mix them up and take turns fishing them out. You will, of course, have much more fun trying them out! This is often all that is needed to rev up a “vanilla” guy – simply because they don’t see the fantasy box as a threat to their ego/manhood/pride like they would if you outright told him what he was doing wrong and gave him sex tips.

Reward Him

Men are awesome like puppies – loving, playful and in need of praise when they do something right. When your man does something especially hot that you’re totally into, make some noise! Do NOT let the opportunity slip away – if he doesn’t hear anything, he’s going to assume he’s done something you don’t like and move on to the next ideas or sex tips. So if you don’t let him know when he does something spot on, you’re really screwing yourself because he’ll never learn what you like!

Let him know how much it turns you on when he does something good. Also, reward him by doing something he really enjoys – like giving him an amazing blowjob. This doesn’t apply only to sex either. You can mix and match. Reward him for a sweet gesture like filling up your car with gas by giving him road head. Or taking him on an impromptu shopping spree at the manly store of his choice. Either way, so long as you reward him for anything he does that pleases you. Because when you do, he’ll want to do it again!

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: have better sex, lingerie, Relationship Advice, sex games, sex tips

10 Advanced Tools For Incredible Handjobs

By loveandsex

A handjob doesn’t have to be any old handjob. These simple but effective accessories can turn something “ho hum” into something absolutely orgasmic!

While your hands (and some lube) are really all that is needed for a great hand job, some variety makes it more fun for you and him. Here are some ideas on elements that can be used to add some zest and excitement to your repertoire.

1. Candle Wax

You can buy candles that are specifically designed for body massages. As the candle burns and the wax is melted, you can pour the melted wax on your lovers body. It should be safe to pour on his shaft and testicles. His glans (head) might be too sensitive to the heat. Do a test drop first. I loved it when my wife did this for me but not something I’d want every time. I personally think warm oil/lube is better for a handjob overall but for a man, the smell, sight and feeling of the candle wax being lovingly poured on your penis is special indeed and worth doing now and again.

2. Scarf Or Tie

Take some of your silk scarves or his old ties and put them to good use. Drape the over his body, wrap them around his rod and pass them between his legs. He’ll go crazy from the soft, silky, breezy fabrics touching his sensitive spots. Do this BEFORE you get out the lube to keep them from getting soiled. If you want to get real kinky, use them to “tie him up” while you give him an exciting handjob experience. And while you are at it you can also use them to blindfold him. That adds another very interesting dimension to a handjob. It puts all his energy on assessing the pleasure of your touch.

3. Silk Or Satin Lingerie

Taking off your lingerie will certainly get his blood pumping and you can do one better. Rub your silky nightie or underwear around his shaft and balls. He’ll go nuts. This is what it did for one of my subscribers: “My favorite hand-job spin is this: my girl will take her satin Nighty, turn it inside out, and rub my hard-on with the silky material…WOW I throb big-time! She may add a vibe to tingle my balls with her other hand. Sometimes I can’t hold back and I’ll jizz now.”

4. A Vibrator

As you just read, battery operated toys are not just for women. They work exceptionally well on men’s sensitive areas. Buzz his nipples, his sack, his rod. He’ll even like it if you touch his anus with it (you can put a condom over it if you want to keep it sanitary). If you don’t have a “dildo” on hand, simply use an old battery powered toothbrush. Just keep the bristles away from him.

5. Beads

No, not anal beads (although some men would really go for that too). I am talking about pearl necklaces. If you have a bead necklace that is smooth, wrap it around his shaft and pull it back and forth to massage his manhood. Just be aware that some lubes and oils might eventually break down the string so don’t use an expensive necklace.

6. Fruit

This is for the adventurous. Take a melon and cut a hole in it the size of his erect shaft (make it a little on the tight size. Slide it on his hard-on, then move the melon up and down to push his cock in and out. He’ll smell and taste wonderful. If the suction is too strong, cut a small hole in the opposite side of the melon. You can also use a banana. Cut the end off the banana and gently scoop out enough flesh so that his penis will fit in tight. You can also put the banana in the microwave for a few seconds to warm it up but be VERY CAREFUL to test it with your finger to make sure it is not too hot. If you like the taste of kiwi then cut the top and bottom off a kiwi fruit and take a little flesh out of the center and use the “sleeve” to masturbate your guy.

7. Vegetables

Same idea as above but use a zucchini, eggplant or cucumber. Instead of scooping out the flesh you can often press in a broom handle to create a hole deep and wide enough.

8. Condoms

Put lube on his member and them roll down a condom and use it as a sleeve to jerk off your guy. A nice side benefit is that clean up is a cinch. Also, try a “ribbed” condom and turn it inside out before putting it over his manhood. The ribs will give him lots of wonderful sensations all over. Here’s something else to try with a condom. Blow it up into a balloon, a little smaller than a bowling ball. Quickly insert his penis into the hole to seal it up. If air starts to leak hold it tight around his shaft (or ask him to hold it). You will both be able to see his penis inside the “balloon.” If you can manage it, get him to come and see him squirt all over the inside. Guys will really like this visual.

9. Plastic Baggies

Fill one zippered baggie with warm water and one with ice water. Use them at different intervals touching various parts of his body to bring your man different sensations.

10. Fan

You can use a hand fan or an electric fan to blow air over your man to create a slight breeze. It feels quite refreshing on the testicles which aren’t used to a lot of fresh air.

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: better sex, condoms, handjob, lingerie, lube, masturbation, sex tips, vibrator

3 Juicy Tips That Will Drive Her Wild In Bed!

By lloydlester

Sex tips are helpful when trying to give a girl an orgasm, but many guys fall short of this. Check out these three strategies to make her insane with pleasure!

There is a difference between having good sex and enjoying amazing sex. Good sex is one that gives you that pleasurable feeling of being erotically fulfilled. Amazing sex, on the other hand, involves more intense lovemaking and evokes tantalizing moments of hot passion that is truly unforgettable.

It is clear which kind of sex men and women would love to have. If you want to ignite sizzling fireworks in her, there are a few simple tips that will bring a whole new level of excitement into lovemaking that both you and her will truly enjoy and savor. Try these for good measure!

Discover Her Body Before Sex

Lovemaking will soon become a humdrum affair if you let things stay the way it is today. But you can bring her to the heights of sexual ecstasy even without engaging in any sexual intercourse. In fact, it is better that you enjoy each others’ bodies without penetration. The key lies in bringing your imagination to the forefront and getting a little naughty and provocative, if you will.

Bring on some “erotic aids” to the bedroom – chocolate body paint, blindfolds, feathers, massage oils, handcuffs etc. Use these to discover and explore her body and bring her to a suspended state of ecstasy though playful teasing. Many couples reported that they had the most sensational sex just through this journey of erotic discovery!

The “Fantasy Box”

Every woman has her own ideas and fantasies about the perfect sex – one that she is probably too shy to bring it out into the open. To keep her on the erotic edge all the time, ask her to write down her fantasies on one of those small post-it pads. Drop them into a small box and tug it away in your bedroom. Every now and then, when you want to sizzle things up, just dip into the box, retrieve one of these and relive her fantasies on the spot!

Sexy On The Outside Means Sexy On The Inside

Know what is the easiest way to hike up her sexual desires? Make her feel sexy about her body! Many women feel somewhat shy or even conscious about their endowments and body contours. Get into a bubble bath with her and give her some erotic massage on her back.

Buy her some sexy lingerie, put them on for her and compliment the way she looks. The soft silky feel of the lingerie on her skin and the words you speak to her can make her feel a lot sexier and help her loosen her own inhibitions in the sack. Well, when she starts feeling a little naughty, you will be in for some fireworks for the night!

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: have better sex, lingerie, making love, sex tips

How To Choose The Perfect Sex Toy As A Valentine’s Day Gift

By loveandsex

Your Valentine’s Day gift should be a great one! You want to show your partner that she’s important to you and that you care for her – but you wouldn’t mind if you could also let her know that she’s super sexy and you love getting it on with her. If you want to get your girl a toy, here’s how to make sure you’re getting one she’ll really love.

Pay Attention To What She Likes

If you want to successfully give your girl a sex toy as a Valentine’s Day gift, you really need to know her. You need to pay attention to what she likes in bed! Think about it – does she like it when you stimulate her nipples? What about when you play with or suck on her clitoris? Does she really get off on deep penetration, or does she like anal play? Really think about what she seems to respond to the most during intercourse.

This will help you understand what toy is best to get her. For example, if she prefers nipple stimulation, try gifting her with a high end pair of nipple clamps or nipple vibrators. If she likes clitoral stimulation the best, why not get her a cute little clitoris vibrator that she can use discreetly? If she likes spanking, get a soft but kinky paddle to use when you do it with her. Whatever it is that seems to float her boat, that is what you want to stick to when purchasing a toy for her.

Go For Quality

Don’t expect your lover to open a box with a $20 vibrator in it and be very excited – she won’t be. She’s seen better stuff at novelty shops in the mall. If you’re going to really get her a toy for Valentine’s Day and you really want her to like it (and not throw you out in the dog house for the night), then be prepared to spend a few bucks. While you can spend over $100 on a vibrator, you don’t have to.

Make sure you’re purchasing something that is made from quality, high end materials. Get her something phthalate free and easy to clean – hard plastic or soft silicone are excellent sex toy materials. If you get her a jelly dildo that stinks like toxic plastic, she’s not going to be very appreciative and she’s certainly not going to want to get it near her nether regions. Most high end sex toys will come in a nice enough package to gift, but if yours doesn’t, either have it gift wrapped or do it yourself. Don’t just slap a bow on a box with a naked chick on the front demonstrating the toy.

Get Another Gift Too

It may sound like you’re racking up the Valentine’s Day gift bill here (and you are), but don’t make a sex toy her only present this year – and don’t give it to her over dinner. If you don’t want to spend enough money to do gifting a sex toy successful, then find something else to do! Sure, sex toys are fun and all, but only giving her a sex toy for her (or one that you can use together) is pretty lame. It will peg you as being only interested in her for the sex!

Instead, give her another gift over dinner, such as jewelry or chocolates – or another well thought out present – and save the sex toy for a more private place such as your house or hers. She’ll be smitten by your earlier gift already, and when you are both in a more intimate setting, she can really look at and enjoy the sex toy without worrying about stuffing it in her bag right away so no one at the restaurant sees what you gave her. Just be classy about it!

A Note On Lingerie

Don’t give your girl lingerie as a Valentine’s Day gift for her. While this is perfectly acceptable to give her on Valentine’s Day, realize that this really is a gift for you. She’s not going to get off on it at all, unless it’s really nice and comfortable lingerie that she can wear around the house or under her clothes. A bustier and garter belt set is not an acceptable gift for her on its own. Get her something else you know she’ll love, and then enjoy the lingerie as a gift for you. 

Filed Under: Valentine's Day Tagged With: dildo, lingerie, sex tips, Sex Toys, Valentines Day, valentines day gift, Valentines Day Ideas, vibrator

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