A blowjob can be incredible pleasure for a man – sometimes, it can be even better than traditional intercourse. But you don’t want it to turn into an epic fail and even if you think you know it all when it comes to oral sex, you could still probably use to learn a few things. Just follow these simple blow job “do nots” and he’ll be wild with passion instead of cringing in discomfort!
1. Using Your Teeth
Using your teeth is probably the worst blowjob faux pas you could make. This always hurts and never, ever feels good. Even under the “right” circumstances. There’s no way to make your teeth an acceptable oral sex tool, so tuck those pearly whites under your lips for a smooth ride down his shaft.
2. Not Acting Excited Enough
Have you ever gotten oral sex from a guy who was less than thrilled to be down there? Was he silent, or even worse, begrudging? Did he act like it was a chore, or even act like impassive? It probably wasn’t very good then. Guess what? The same applies to oral sex for him. He wants you to be excited about giving him head. He wants you to love fellatio as much – or nearly as much – as he does. Bonus points for you if you love it MORE than he does! So don a smile, tell him how much you love sucking him off and act as though you’d rather not be anywhere else.
3. Sucking Too Hard At First
Sucking is awesome, but if you do it too hard at first – before he’s fully warmed up – can have the same effect as him rubbing your clitoris with a dry finger when you’re not turned on. It hurts! Suck gently until you’re sure he’s absolutely aroused and begging for more. Gradually build your way up to sucking harder, gauging his reactions the whole way. Use his body language as your cues to keep doing what you’re doing, suck harder or go softer.
4. Gagging (Or Worse, Vomiting)
If you can’t deep throat, that’s okay. But if you can’t, don’t try – at least, don’t try on him. Gagging really isn’t attractive, and vomiting on him is even worse. If you want to learn how to deep throat, practice on a peeled banana to learn how to control your gag reflex. Don’t try it on your man unless you’re absolutely sure you won’t gag – and if you’re not entirely sure of that, be certain you won’t at least vomit.
5. Doing It Too Soft
You know not to suck too hard when giving a blowjob, but did you also know that having too soft a mouth is equally as frustrating for a man? You don’t want to give head like a pansy, do you? Feel free to start out with soft licking and sucking at first to get him erect and turned on, but that phase shouldn’t last much longer past the initial erection phase. Get busy, girl!
6. Not Discussing Semen First
He probably wants you to swallow. He may want to ejaculate all over your breasts. You may not desire either of those things, but if you don’t discuss it first, you may end up with semen in your mouth and he may get offended at your spitting it out immediately and dousing your mouth with any liquid you can find within reach. So discuss where the semen is going to go before you start giving head. Surely you and your partner can find a compromise.
7. Not Keeping It Wet Enough
You’d think it’s impossible to have a dry blowjob, but it is. Of course things are always going to be damp (that is the nature of oral sex, after all) but it feels much better if it’s really, really wet. So don’t suck all your saliva back in. If you don’t have enough saliva, use flavored lube. Either way, make sure there’s plenty of moisture to keep things going smoothly (wet n’ nasty is preferred, however).
8. Not Using Your Hand
During masturbation, he usually will stroke his shaft and may play with his balls. So leaving these parts unattended can leave your guy feeling pretty neglected. If you can’t bring your mouth all the way down to the base of his shaft, try using your hand instead. Using your hand on the shaft of his penis and his scrotum while sucking on the head can multiply how much pleasure you give him by quite a bit.
9. Keeping Just The Head In Your Mouth
Although you definitely don’t want to shove his penis so far down your throat that you gag or vomit, you also don’t want to stay focus solely on the head. You want to at least go partway down his shaft with your mouth, if you can’t get it down all the way. If you can’t, again, use your hand to stimulate the base of his penis while your mouth works on the head and upper part of the shaft.
10. Playing With His Anus If He’s Not Okay With It
Some guys like anal stimulation during a blowjob while others really, really don’t. And there are usually no grey areas here, so if you aren’t sure where he stands on anal play, definitely skip it. The last thing you want to do is shove a lubed finger up his ass without his prior consent and ruining the blowjob – and possibly your relationship. If you want to experiment with his anus while giving him head, make sure you talk about it first and get the green light from him.